What To Live For!
by Shyloe
Summary: Bella struggles through her last year of school and losing a loved one. She wonders what she really has to live for. She is continuously bullied and has no one to turn to. Will she survive her last year? AH!
1. Ch1 Ugly Stick!

**Stephenie Meyer Owns these Characters!**

**Enjoy!**

Chapter 1: Ugly Stick!

Bella's POV

It all started in grade eight, during elementary school I had friends. I enjoyed school and people in it.

On the summer after my last year of elementary school my Mom ever so softly told me she was shipping me off to my Dad's in Forks. She told me it was her turn to get freedom, her turn to shine… whatever the fuck that meant. So I packed up my belongings and boarded a plane.

I wasn't upset to live with Charlie, my dad, because we were so much alike. We were both quiet and didn't need to fill in the quiet space with ridiculous banter, like my mother, but I was upset that I had to leave my friends behind.

I barely had any clothes for Forks cold wet weather, since I lived in Florida before, so on my first day of school I looked ridiculous. I was wearing Capri's with boots and a oversized sweater that made me look like I had absolutely no form at all. I wore my hair down trying to just fade into the walls. But it did the complete opposite.

There was a guy walking towards me, actually a whole group of people, but the guy was the only one I could focus on. He locked his eyes with me and was walking right to me, one side of his mouth turned up into a handsome grin, and I couldn't help but smile back. I felt my face flush as he got closer and I just stood there in the middle of the hall staring and smiling at him. He had bronze hair, bright green eyes, he was tall and thin. When he got closer I noticed his grin didn't look that friendly and then he spoke.

"My my look at you, who the fuck beat you with the ugly stick?" Now I will start off with saying that yes he did have a smooth velvety voice, but the words he spoke were harsh, and I stung with rejection. I blinked furiously and looked down biting my lip. Everyone in the halls turned and laughed at my ridiculous outfit. The people the god like boy was with were sneering and laughing at me. I felt sick. I walked past them and ran to my locker. Thankful that I had gotten all of my info and locker the week before.

After the first week I knew the name of the bronze haired boy, his name was Edward, his friends were James, Rosalie, and Jasper, and Emmet and Alice was his siblings. James was very attractive too, he was more built and had long hair pulled back. After the first comment they didn't do much but snicker and point. A month into it, I finally broke and asked Charlie for some money so I could go shopping, he allowed it and drove me to Port Angeles he went to the food court while I walked around the mall.

I picked out some nice jeans and shirts, even a new pair of shoes and a nice rain jacket. The next day at school I thought people would realize I'm not that bad, but instead it was the opposite effect. Everyone laughed harder, calling me a wannabe.

That was my first year of hell. I tolerated it. No one would speak to me, some would fear that they would be called down too, others just didn't want to give me the time of day. So I kept my head down, and my grades up.

Grade nine was pretty much the same, a little bit worse. Edward was a little more built and so was James. They were always the ones to bug me the most. I seemed to be there outlet. Sometimes they would call me ugly duckling, other times they would shove by me. I just ignored them. At home I would cook and clean for Charlie and the minute I was behind closed doors I would cry into my pillow. Then start all over again.

By the end of grade eleven I was a depressed teenager and felt like I couldn't take anymore. Not only would Edward and James pick on me, but now so were there whores. Jessica, Tanya, Lauren, Victoria. The guys were mean but the girls well they were brutal. Calling me horrible names. Tripping me, pulling my hair as they walk by. I was so ready for summer. I got a job at a store in Port Angeles, I was working 6 am to 2pm it was a little shoe store and I loved it.

"Oh great, what the fuck are you doing here." I looked up to see non other than James and Edward. It was Edward who spoke. I looked over at my supervisor Marie. Her eyes narrowed at them. When they noticed they were being watched they changed there tune. I looked at my watch thankful that my break could start now.

I looked over at Marie. "I'm due for a break, and I need some air." Marie's eyes softened when she looked at me and nodded. The thing about not having friends at school, you get close to people you work with. Marie knew all about my trouble at school.

After that day, my work became my hell. They told all of there friends and whores where I worked, so I was always seeing them, listening to there horrid comments, telling me how the customer service sucks here. I quit two weeks before school started not being able to take anymore. Marie felt awful, but I told her it was no biggie, I was used to it.

I went to school early, driving my decrepit truck. It was old, it was rusty, it was slow, it was perfect… for me. Charlie had bought it off a friend of his during the summer, so I had wheels for work.

So when I pulled up and seen the shiny silver fucking Volvo right behind me, my heart started to race. I knew this would be a bad day, I knew this would be a bad year. I could feel it in the pit of my stomach.

I parked and turned off my truck. Edward pulled up beside me and a black mustang parked on the other side. I looked over and sure enough it was James.

I grabbed my bag and opened my truck stepping out and closing the door behind me. I ran past the Volvo and towards the school, before Either of them could step in my way. When I got to my locker I felt like maybe I was safe for a couple hours. Till I heard them behind me.

"That is one ugly fuckin truck." Said Edward.

"It goes with one ugly fuckin chick." Said James.

I shook my head and opened my locker. I emptied my bag, putting all my new folders and binders in it. Along with the laptop I bought with one of my checks. I grabbed my art folder and headed towards the class. "Hey Swan, why do you keep running away from us?" Yelled Edward. I put my head down and kept walking. Once in class I relaxed and waited for the teacher to start.

By the time my day was over I was exhausted. I had three classes with Edward and one of those classes also included James. I was tired and I walked to my locker putting my homework and laptop into my bag. I ran out, and raced to my truck.

When I got home I felt like I was suffocating, I walked to the bathroom and took a shower, chanting over and over, its only one more year, I can handle one more year.

When I got out I made lasagna, and waited for Charlie. He came in around seven and told me he was working on a hard case. He ate quick and went to bed. "I will be gone before you go to school Bells, I have to leave at 4 in the morning so make sure to lock up."

"Okay Dad, sleep well, and be safe." He nodded and said a quiet 'I always am.' before walking up the stairs.

I cleaned up Charlie's mess and went to bed myself.

The next day I was walking to my art class, and someone kicked my leg hard making me scream out and topple over. Laughter filled the halls. My leg was throbbing. When I looked up Lauren, was there. "Oops did I do that, Must've slipped." She smirked at me and turned on her high heels.

I tried to get up but fell again, my ankle was throbbing, it felt tight and strange. I hobbled to class leaving very little pressure on it.

I walked out of my third class, holding onto my laptop, and trying not to fall. James walked by me and shoved me hard. I put pressure on my swollen ankle and cried out, I fell over and my laptop flew out of my hands. James snickered and walked away. I looked over and my computer was smashed. Several chunks lay around it. Tears started to fall out of my eyes. "Fuck." I screamed loudly, it echoed down the halls, since I was the only one there. I grabbed what was left of it and threw it in my locker. Grabbing my Biology text book. I wiped my eyes quickly before entering the class room. Edward sat in front of my seat, smirking at me.

I sat down in my seat. Too pissed and upset about my ruined laptop to even think about biology. I rested my head in my hands and fought back the tears. "Only one more year." I whisper out quietly. There was a knock at the door and two police officers appeared. One was someone I knew as Jack, he worked with my Dad a lot. The other officer had a out of town uniform.

"Is Isabella Swan in here." I stood up and looked at them. "Can we speak with you?" I nodded and started packing up my stuff.

In front of me Edward spoke up "Maybe your dear sweet Daddy finally got killed in the line of duty." He snickered and I panicked. He looked up at me and seen my panic and rolled his eyes. "Take a fucking joke Swan."

I turned and limped out to the hallway. "What's wrong?" I asked immediately.

Jack looked at me with sad eyes. "Lets go somewhere more private."

"No no just tell me right now, what is going on, where is Charlie." I was on the brink of panic. I could feel it, I knew right then that it was bad, very bad.

"I'm so sorry Bella, Charlie was shot earlier today. We were in the middle of a drug bust, and your Father was killed."

I covered my mouth, and started to whimper. My body shook and I fell to the floor. "No no no no no this cant be happening. I just saw him last night, I JUST FUCKING SAW HIM." I screamed loudly.

**Okay Guys there is the first chapter of my new story…**

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	2. Ch2 Crossed A Line!

**Stephenie Meyer Owns These Characters!**

**Enjoy!**

Chapter 2: Crossed A Line!

Edwards POV

"Maybe your dear sweet Daddy finally got killed in the line of duty." I snickered Ugly Duckling looked at me with scared eyes, fuck she can be stupid. "Take a fucking joke Swan."

I started to write more notes that were on the board when I heard someone cry from the hallway. I looked over towards the door and Isabella was sliding down. The cops looked pained and lost. I missed the first part of what she said, but heard the last as clear as day.

"…last night, I JUST FUCKING SAW HIM." She bellowed out.

My stomach twisted uncomfortably when I realized that my fucked up comment was now Isabella's reality. 'fuck' I muttered under my breath feeling like utter shit.

Yeah I was an ass to her, and yeah I fucking hated her, but I didn't wish death upon her or her Dad.

One of the cops lifted Bella up and she hugged him closely while he carried her away. Her cries disappeared the further she got.

After class James my best bud came up to me. "Dude did you see the duck getting carried out of here, I didn't think Lauren kicked her that hard." He laughed loudly but stopped when he seen my face. I told him what happened in biology and his eyes damn near bugged out of his head. "Fuck man, that's messed up. You crossed a line bud, to say shit like that." I nodded knowing he was right.

"I don't know what the fuck I was thinking, I just wanted to get a rise out of her, its hard to fuckin do you know."

James nodded. "Yeah I know what you mean. She is pretty unresponsive now."

When the rest of the crew came out of the school, James and I let them know what was up. Everyone shrugged not really giving a shit, except for Jasper. He was always empathetic about people, he never did partake in the ugly duckling games.

I drove home by myself, leaving Alice to ride with Emmet. Emmet failed his grade twelve so he is taking it over, and Alice is my twin. When I got in, my Dad Carlisle, was sitting in the living room his head in his hands. "Hey Dad, what's wrong?" I asked sincerely, I hated seeing him upset.

"I lost the Chief in my OR today son. I couldn't save him and now his daughter is all alone." My chest tightened and I felt sick again.

"I'm sorry Dad, that's awful." Dad nodded his head and stood up, leaving the room silently. I sat there wondering what would happen to Isabella, and if she would stay. Would I stop bugging her? Probably not, it was the best part of my day.

I walked into the kitchen to find my Mother Esme baking and crying. I kissed her on the cheek and asked what all the food was for. "Comfort food, for Bella, I am making her some meals since she wont be in the mood to do so herself." I furrowed my eyebrows confused. Wondering who Bella was… then it clicked, Isabella. Mom was cooking for the duck.

"That's very sweet of you Mom." I said sweetly not wanting to sound rude. I hugged her tightly then went to my room.

The next day I went to school and the duck was no where to be seen. I forgot about her quickly as Tanya dragged me to the girls bathroom and sucked me off before first period. I knew I was good looking all the girls swooned when I gave them my crooked grin. I was more built now, no longer the scrawny fourteen year old boy. So it was a regular occurrence to have one of my girls pleasure me. I didn't offer anything in return and they didn't care.

James had his own swooning girls, he was built about the same as me. We worked out at the gym together four days a week. We didn't share chicks though, that was a fuckin deal breaker.

"Hey man did ya hear about the duck?" James questioned as he joined me in English. I shook my head no and he continued. "She is staying at her Dad's house, they are letting her live there. She gets some sort of monthly allowance to help her live. Fucked up eh?"

"That is fucked, doesn't she have any other family." I asked feeling bad for the duck.

"Yeah I guess her Mom is some kind of free spirited hippy and doesn't want her back." James said shaking his head with disgust.

"How the fuck do you know all this." I asked feeling slightly annoyed.

James just shrugged his shoulders. "Mom works at the cop station, secretary remember." I nodded remembering that he had told me so before. I didn't go to his place much since his Dad was a drunk and liked to lash out, so my place was like a safe haven for him. He didn't talk about his family much.

After school I waited for my brother and sister since they were riding with me today. James was going to come over but said he had something to take care of. I raised my eyebrow wondering what he was keeping from me.

"Don't worry about it man just some chick shit, I'll catch up with you in a couple hours." I nodded figuring he was catching up with Vickie to get his dick wet.

**I think I am going to Enjoy writing this story!**

**Next POV Bella's!**

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	3. Ch3 How To Deal!

**Stephenie Meyer Owns These Characters!**

**Okay guys I know I said I would do a Bella POV this chapter, but I think we need a James, to see what type of person he is, and why he is a bully.**

**We all know now why Edward does it, he is a spoiled ass. Ha ha anyway here is a little bit of James for you. **

Chapter 3: How To Deal!

James POV

I was sitting in class when I heard someone crying, I looked up just in time to see a cop carrying Isabella out, she was clinging to the officer for dear life. Lauren snorted beside me and I looked over, raising an eyebrow. "I didn't kick her that fucking hard." She growled out.

"What are you talking about whore." I asked, yeah I always called her a whore, that's what she was. Lauren just rolled her eyes at me and looked down at her fake assed nails.

"I kicked the stupid bitch this morning and she fell over like a ton of bricks." She smiled sickly sweet and I was disgusted. "Anyway, you can clearly tell she is making it look good to try to get me into shit." I could only hope.

Yeah I was a dick to Isabella, but those girls were brutal. Then I remembered pushing by her in the hall not expecting her to cry out and fall like she did, she was probably already hurting. When I watched her laptop fly out and smash against the floor, I immediately felt guilty, but there was nothing I could do about it, damage was done. If I did apologize to her, Edward would make me feel like shit.

Edward was my best friend, even though sometimes I wanted nothing more than to punch him in the head. He is the only one who knows about my shitty home life, and I know that if I do something that will piss him off, he would gladly tell people.

After class when I talked to Edward about 'Duck' he looked guilty as shit. When he told me her Dad was dead and what he had said to her, I felt sick to my stomach. The girl had no one now. "Fuck man, that's messed up. You crossed a line bud, to say shit like that." I told him trying not to fucking growl it out. Edward agreed, which shocked the shit out of me.

After school I went straight home to make sure my Mom was alright, my Dad woke up with a hangover this morning and my Mom was using the hairdryer. He yelled at her and told her it was too loud. She turned it off quickly, hoping it would be fine, but we both knew it was too late. He backhanded her and she fell the floor unconscious.

My Mom is a small woman, she didn't eat properly or take care of herself. My Dad was the opposite. He worked out a lot, he was built like a body builder, and drank like a fish. He was a mean drunk, but he was even worse when he had a hangover.

I had a series of small burns on my back, from when I was younger, and my Mom would be at work. He would burn me with his cigarettes, if I played to loud in the morning, after he would drink. I learned by the age of six, not to make noise in my house.

I was bigger now, and I worked out a lot, but I was still not as big as my Dad, I swore the day I can overpower my father I will kick the shit out of him until he was within an inch of his life. Then I will take my Mom and leave.

My Mom had tried to leave with me twice before, but he always found us, and the last time he beat us both so bad and told my Mom if she ever left him again, he would kill me. So she never tried anymore, she would never risk me.

When I walked in the door the house was quiet, except for the loud snoring of my passed out father. I breathed a sigh of relief and walked to the kitchen knowing that is where my Mom would be.

She was peeling potatoes, her back to me. "Hey Mom, how are you feeling?" I questioned quietly. The minute she heard my voice, her shoulders slumped and her body started to shake.

"Oh James, I don't want you to see me this way, please don't look at me." Fuck he did worse when I left. I tried to stay home, but there was no way my father would allow it. I reached out and put my hand on Mom's shoulder, turning her slowly.

When I looked at her face I was so angry, so sickened. She had two long cuts on her one cheek, both eyes were black, he bottom lip was split open. I pulled her towards me and hugged her fiercely wishing there was more I could do. "Fuck Mom we need to leave, you cant do this anymore, this is so fucked up."

Mom shook her head quickly and pulled out of my arms, turning around to finish the potatoes. "No James only one more year and you will be in college, then I can leave." She always told me this shit, thinking if I go to college that will be the get out of jail free card. I fuckin hoped so, because the beatings were getting worse, and more frequent.

At exactly 6:30 dinner was served, if my Mom was even a minute late, she would be 'punished'.

"Did you hear about Chief Swan?" Questioned my father, staring at my Mom waiting for her to answer.

"Yes I received a phone call from Tara, who was working today, apparently Isabella is going to be living in the house by herself, her Mother doesn't want her, she is a… free spirit, I guess."

My father scoffed at that. "Sounds like a careless bitch, reminds me of someone else I know." He laughed loudly at his sick fucking joke and dug in to his food once more

"How is she supposed to live?" I asked Mom as I helped her clear the table. I felt horrible for Isabella her Mom not wanting her, I couldn't imagine that.

"They are giving her an allowance, and her father had a plan that will keep her comfortable for awhile." I nodded feeling a little better. "Maybe you could check on her tomorrow, see how she is, make sure she is okay." She offered, obviously seeing the turmoil on my face.

She would not want to see me, I was sure of that. If I told my Mom that, she would question why, and if I told her why, she would be hurt and disgusted the way I have been treating her, especially since she gets bullied every dad from her own husband. So instead I nodded and said I would.

The next day at school I had told Edward about Isabella, and he looked annoyed that I cared, so I bit my tongue about going over there.

After school I walked to the parking lot with the crew, telling Edward I would come over a little later. He looked at me with a raised eyebrow wanting a god damn play by play. So I told him the one thing he would not question me about later. "Don't worry about it man just some chick shit, I'll catch up with you in a couple hours." It wasn't really a lie, Isabella was a chick.

Edward left the parking lot first, and I left a minute later, so he wouldn't see where I was headed. The drive to Isabella's house was short, too damn short. When I got there, the only vehicle was Old Rusty, that Isabella drove.

I got out and walked towards the house. When I walked up the three steps onto the patio, I noticed Isabella in a small, old patio couch, she was sleeping curled into a ball. I panicked at first, hoping she was alright.

I walked over to her slowly and knelt down in front of her. She had a small frown on her face, her cheeks were wet, a little pucker in the middle of her forehead, eyebrows furrowed. Her sleep looked anything but peaceful. Her body was shaking, from the cold air. I knew I had to wake her up, but fuck I didn't want her to scream.

I reached out and tucked a strand of hair behind her ear, and her eyes popped open quickly. She gasped when she seen who was touching her and I pulled my hand back quickly. "What-what do you want from me." Isabella whimpered. Her eyes starting to water, lip quivering.

"I was just coming to check on you Duck, no need to start freaking the fuck out." I said standing up. "It's cold out here, you should go inside."

"Why did you want to check on me?" Isabella asked.

"My Mom wanted me to." I said simply, while shrugging my shoulders. "Now why the fuck are you still sitting there, your gonna freeze to death, go inside." I said a little loud, hoping to scare her to go inside.

"No, I cant go in there, I- I just cant go in there. It's just not the same its so -so quiet." She was sobbing now, hiccupping. My gut twisted uncomfortably, seeing her closed off and emotionless was something I was used to, but seeing her crying and break down. Made her a real person. I couldn't let her stay outside, she would fucking die of hypothermia. I grabbed her arm and lifted her up swiftly. When she landed on her feet she screamed out, falling over and crashing into me.

I growled in frustration, pissed at myself for forgetting about her damn leg. I lifted her up bridal style and her arms went around my neck, gripping me tightly afraid I would drop her I suppose. She had fear in her eyes, and I was sick with myself for making her feel that way.

I walked her to the door and used the hand under her back to open it, since she was gripping me tight enough not to fall. Once inside I walked into the living room depositing her on the couch. "Don't go back outside 'Duck' your gonna fucking get sick and shit." She just nodded and tenderly put her foot on the table wincing slightly.

I rolled my eyes and walked over to the table sitting down beside her foot, I pulled her pant leg up and her sock down, and fuck it looked bad. "What are you doing." Screeched Isabella, trying to tug her foot away, but stopped instantly when she realized how painful that was.

Her ankle was swollen and purple. It looked broken. "I think it's broken Duck, you should get that shit looked at."

"Whatever." She mumbled, looking at her hands.

I couldn't handle being in there anymore, and Isabella was obviously uncomfortable. So I gently put her foot beside me and found her kitchen quickly. I looked in the freezer and grabbed some peas, then and then a towel. When I walked back in the living room, she was tuned and laying down on the couch, I put the towel over her bare ankle then the frozen peas. I walked out right after without saying a word.

I took off to Edwards. When I got there Dr. Cullen answered the door. I quickly looked around to make sure no one was around.

"Maybe you could go to Isabella's and check on her ankle, it looks broken." I whispered in a low tone. Dr. Cullen nodded without saying a word, or asking why I was whispering. He was a great man. He told Esme he was going to check on a patient and grabbed a leather bag before heading out.

I walked up to Edwards room, acting like I just got laid, instead of just telling him I checked on Isabella.

"So Eddie boy what are your plans for the night?" I questioned, as I sat down on the leather couch.

Edward snickered at me then rubbed his hands together. "Well I was thinking about going to the Duck residents, maybe scare the shit out of her." He was smiling widely and I just shook my head, this shit is fucked up.

"Dude her Dad just fuckin died, she is all alone, and you want to make it worse?" I was getting pissed.

Edward shrugged. "Whatever man, you don't have to come, Emmet and I have it all planned."

"Alright, I'm out, see you at school tomorrow." I said, not wanting to stick around, and hear what shit they have planned.

**Okay there ya go! Now next Chapter will be Bella POV promise.**

**What will Edward and Emmet do?!?**

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	4. Ch4 Never Ends!

**Stephenie Meyer Owns These Characters!**

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Chapter 4: Never Ends!

Bella's POV

When I woke up to James standing over me, I damn near pissed myself, worst case scenario ran through my head, he was going to kill me. I know, after waking up a bit I knew it wouldn't be that bad, but the week I had it wouldn't have surprised me as much, as him helping me inside did.

I was shocked into silence when he picked me up. I clung to him, half scared he might drop me and half because I was desperate for any human contact.

After he dropped me on the couch and put frozen peas on my ankle he left, slamming the door behind him. I just lay on the couch, staring at the television which was black. The remote was too far away for me to reach, and I really didn't want to move.

Twenty minutes after James had left there was a knock at my door, I really didn't have the strength to get up so I just called out "Come in." I heard the door open and shut and seconds later, Edwards Dad Dr. Cullen was standing in front of me, with a bag.

"Hello Bella, James tells me you hurt your ankle pretty bad." My eyes widened in surprise, that James went out of his way to tell Dr. Cullen. I nodded timidly and pointed to my ankle.

After poking and prodding at my poor defenseless ankle for ten minutes, he said it was only a bad sprain. He wrapped it up and ran to his vehicle to grab me some crutches. "Keep the pressure off of your ankle as much as possible okay Bella."

I nodded. "Okay Dr. Cullen, thank you." I said with a shy smile.

"Of Course Bella, my wife will be stopping by later, she made you some meals, and comfort food, in case you may not feel like cooking." My eyes widened again.

"She didn't have to do that… but that was very sweet of her." I felt so helpless in that moment, like I couldn't even take care of myself.

"Of course she didn't have to, she wanted to." Said Dr. Cullen with sincere eyes. I just nodded and stared down at my lap. "Okay, now rest easy I will leave some pain killers for you, take one every four hours, and don't exceed five a day." With that he put a bottle of pills on the coffee table. "This will be enough for a week, after that it should be well enough that you can just use Tylenol. I will grab you some water, so you can take one now."

After Dr. Cullen fed me a pill and some water, I dozed off. Several hours later I heard a woman's voice, I suspected it was Esme. She put her hand on my forehead and told me to sleep well. I woke up shortly after hearing the front door close.

Grabbing my crutches I hobbled to the kitchen, sure enough my kitchen counter was full of different food items, all looking freshly baked. Cookies, cinnamon buns, muffins, bread. When I opened my freezer there were several dishes of what looked like meatloaf, and lasagna. My refrigerator had a single plate with ham, potatoes, and corn. I'm guessing leftovers from her meal she had made that day.

A note on the kitchen table had said if I need anything to call her, with her number below. As sweet as that was, I would never call there, in case Edward answered.

I crawled up my stairs, that right I fuckin crawled, there was no way I would try to use my crutches. I soaked in the bath, leaving my bandaged foot out.

Once out I dressed in some PJ's, which consisted of my old raggedy poor excuse for shorts and a wife beater, and went back downstairs, not wanting to sleep so close to Charlie's room. I grabbed a bottle of water out of the fridge and took another pill.

Half an hour later, I was feeling the effects of the little white pill, and laid down on the couch, falling asleep within seconds.

*CRASH* I jumped up, disoriented. "What the fuck was that?" I mumbled to no one in particular. I looked at the VCR that was below the television and it said it was just past eleven. I couldn't shake the foggy feeling from my head. I tried to stand up but fell right back down. I sat there completely silent for several minutes, listening for anything. I could hear creaking above me, which was where Charlie's room was.

My heart started to race like mad. Someone was in his room. I grabbed my crutches and stood up. I made my way to the stairs and just stared up. What was I supposed to do. How could I defend myself. I heard another loud crash and jumped. I covered my mouth with one hand, holding the crutch with my armpit.

"Who- who's there." I called out timidly. No one answered, of course. What the hell was I thinking. I scream show yourself and they walk down the stairs with there heads down.

I very slowly hobbled up the stairs holding my crutches tightly. Once I got to the top of the stairs, I noticed that Charlie's bedroom door was open, earlier it was closed. I stood there breathing heavily, wondering why I didn't call the cops. The thought of cops made me feel sick. I went forward another three feet when I could hear something rattling, then a sound the sounded a lot like a aerosol hairspray can.

"Who the fuck is in here." I said louder. I heard a couple snickers, and I knew, I fucking knew it was Edward and James. I went forward quickly, angry that they would graffiti a dead mans room. The chief of police. Fucking sick.

Why did James have to act like he gave a shit earlier, just to come back and destroy my Fathers belongings.

When I made it to the door, I felt like retching. It looked like a horror scene. There was red paint all over, and in my fathers bed was what looked like a dead body, in his police uniform. A picture that was of myself and my father was broken near my feet, and on the opposite wall of me, there was the words. _Sleep Well_. I covered my mouth and cried out. I felt dizzy, my vision blurring. I felt like I was looking in one of those tricky mirrors that disorients everything. They were already gone, the window open, spray cans were gone. When I looked closer at the uniform with red paint, I noticed it was a blow up sex doll, with a painted mustache.

I hobbled to the bathroom, vomiting up the little bit of a muffin I had eaten earlier. After making my way downstairs I called the police, Jack was there in minutes. He was fuming mad. "Who did this, did you see anyone?" Asked Jack, trying not to show his anger to me.

I shook my head. "I didn't see who they were, but I know who it was. The same people who have been tormenting me at school, the same people who make my life a living hell." I was gritting my teeth and Jack shook his head.

"I'm sorry Bella, but unless you have evidence, unless you seen something, we cant do or say anything." He did look apologetic. I just nodded, knowing it was the truth, I had my father tell me the same about a similar case that had happened almost a year ago.

"I cant go up there, I cant clean that, I don't know anybody who can." I told Jack, feeling absolutely defeated.

"Well maybe I will come over some time next week, and help you alright."

I just nodded at Jack and said a small thank you. He went into Charlie's room, and closed and locked the window. He did the same with mine and every other window. I made sure to lock both doors when he left, and lay back down on the couch.

Sleep didn't come for me again that night, and every time it was close, I would remember my Dad's room and bolt up.

It was Friday and I decided I would go to school, being stuck in the house knowing what was upstairs, it was driving me crazy.

No one pushed me when I got there. I even had a few people tell me they were sorry. I just said thank you and kept moving.

I spotted Edward a couple times, snickering at me. I just ignored it as I usually do. I knew yelling at him and telling him how sick him and James were would not get me anywhere but knee deep in shit.

After lunch I had a class with both of them, I knew it would be the worst class. I wobbled in with my crutches sitting down close to the window. I stared out waiting for class to start, when it began.

"So Duck did you sleep well?" It was Edward of course it was. Why did he wait till this class to ask that simple question, well misery likes company, and that miserable excuse for a human being wanted the other miserable excuse by his side.

"Wonderfully thank you for asking." I gritted out, not removing my eyes from the window. Instantly pissed at myself for responding, I knew it would only make it worse.

"Oh really, I heard there was a disturbance in your Dad's room, looked like quite a blood bath." Edward snickered at his lame ass joke.

"Yeah you could say that.." I turned my face towards him and James sitting beside each other. "Although you guys would fucking know wouldn't you, you sick fucks." Edward's face turned cold, and James looked confused.

"Don't you dare speak to me like that you stupid bitch." Edward spit out.

I laughed dryly. "Oh I'm so fucking sorry your highness, next time you and James decide to break into my dead fathers room and make it look like a 'blood bath', as you so eloquently put it, I will be sure to watch my attitude." James eyes went even wider and Edward slammed his hand on his desk it rang through the room. "Oh and before I forget, would you like your sex doll back, or did ya buy a new one." I slammed my hand down on my desk copying his move. My hand stinging fiercely, I resisted the urge to shake it out.

James face went pale and everyone was staring at us, even the teacher was silent. James looked at Edward wide eyed. "Dude what the Fuck, is she talking about."

I couldn't stop myself I just kept going. "Oh fuck off James, everyone knows you two are joined at the hip, you don't have to lie."

James turned to glare at me. "Watch your mouth Duck, you don't know what your fuckin talking about." I scoffed at him.

"Okay class that is quite enough, if there is anything else you three need to discuss, you can take it out to the hallway." said the teacher, finally hearing enough gossip.

I shook my head and turned back to the front. Seconds later James stomped by me leaving the classroom with his things in hand.

"You are going to regret ever speaking to me like that you ugly fucking duckling." Whispered Edward behind me.

I snorted. "Yeah because my life could get so much worse than it is now, isn't that right Eddie." I Packed up my stuff and hobbled out of class. I didn't even bother staying there, I just grabbed the rest of my shit from my locker, and headed to the parking lot. I was just about to open my door when something hard hit the back of my head.

I felt the back and looked at my hand, there was blood. As soon as I seen it I felt woozy. Turning around, there was Edward, holding a handful of golf sized rocks. I looked down at my feet and sure enough, there was the rock he had thrown.

I shook my head and turned back around, opening my door as quickly as possible, without falling, and jumped in. Just as I slammed my door, another rock slammed against it. Thanking god he didn't hit the glass, I started my truck and drove away. Not even giving him a second glance.

As I pulled onto my street I could see James' black Mustang, I knew I had nowhere else to go, so I figured I would just deal with it. There really wasn't much more he could do.

I stopped and got out, with my crutches, my backpack on my shoulders. I hobbled right by him and into my house, leaving the door open. I needed a pain killer bad, and I could feel the blood trickling down my neck. I needed a cold wet cloth.

I was wetting a cloth at the sink when James spoke up. "What the fuck happened to your head?" I shook my head.

"You should ask your best bud Eddie that." James came up behind me and grabbed the cloth from my hand. Wiping my neck and then placing it over my wound. "Why are you here?" I asked him, while throwing a pill in my mouth and taking a pull from my water.

**Hmm, why is he there??? Only James can answer that one!!**

**Isn't Edward mean, the spoiled brat cant even handle being yelled at, even when he fully deserves it. Jerkward!!! Lol**

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	5. Ch5 Gone!

**Stephenie Meyer Owns These Characters!**

**HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE!**

**Enjoy!!**

Chapter 5: Gone!

James POV

"Dude what the Fuck, is she talking about." I gritted out to Edward, sickened by what I was hearing. Then Isabella snapped at me, making assumptions.

I stormed out of class minutes later, not knowing what to do. I had never heard Isabella talk like that, and the fact that she talked back to both me and Edward let me know how serious the situation was.

I drove to her home and walked up to her patio. Sitting on the seat she was using the night before. I figured I would have a couple hours to sit there and think everything through, so when I heard her truck only twenty minutes later I was surprised.

I watched her hobble up her patio unstable and looking pale, I expected her to stop in front of me, I was definitely surprised when she walked straight to her door and opened it. She left it opened and walked inside.

I considered it a good enough invitation for me. When I walked into her kitchen doorway I noticed the blood on the back of her head ad dripping down the back of her neck. I tensed immediately knowing it was Edward. He was never one to take people talking back to him…even when he deserved it.

"What the fuck happened to your head?" I asked hoping I was wrong.

"You should ask your best bud Eddie that." I cringed at that, seriously wondering why I was friends with him, and why I treated her so damn badly. I walked over to her, grabbing the cloth she was wetting from her hand and squeezed it out, before wiping her neck down and placing it over the wound on her head. "Why are you here?" She asked as she placed a pill in her mouth, and chugging some water.

I cleaned her wounds and placed the dry towel over her wound, before speaking. "I want to see what kind of damage they did to your Dad's room." I said quietly.

Isabella turned around slowly, and clutched the counter with her hands, staring at me. "You mean you didn't help?" She questioned, obviously bewildered.

I shook my head. "No, fucking hell Duck, I am a prick, but I do draw the line at some fucking point." I said through gritted teeth.

She didn't say anything for several minutes, just looking down at her feet. She looked so broken. "It's Bella… My name is Bella." It was so soft I barely heard her.

I didn't say anything, I knew it was Bella, but I didn't want to call her that, the lines were already being crossed enough, I didn't need to make it worse. "Whatever Duck just point out the room." She sighed heavily but didn't look up.

"Upstairs, last door or that right." I nodded and walked up the stairs without another word. When I opened the door, I damn near screamed, it was messed the fuck up. I couldn't believe Edward and Emmet would stoop to that low. I picked up the phone and dialed his number immediately.

"_This is Emmet, who the fuck are you_." I rolled my eyes as his introduction.

"I need to ask you a simple question, and I want a simple answer… what were you thinking when you decided to redo the Chiefs death, when he only died three days before?"

Emmet sounded like he was choking and then cleared his throat. "_I thought it would be fun, what the fuck is the big deal man, no harm done._" Emmet sounded nervous.

"Oh alright, so making Duck clean up after her fathers fake death, with the real one fresh in her mind, should be a breeze right?" I questioned. Emmet sighed on the other side of the phone.

"_Well fuck, I didn't think about it like that, why the fuck do you care, listen Eddie boy wants to talk to ya_.." Before I could say no Edward spoke.

"_What the fuck is your deal man_." He said through gritted teeth.

"My deal is that I don't want to go down for something that I would never do. That shit is sick, it takes some fucked up individuals to torment someone after there father dies." I spoke lowly into the phone, not wanting Isabella to hear.

"_So your father would be a perfect candidate wouldn't he_." Edward snickered into the phone.

"Yep he sure would, I think you are getting close to his standards, since abusing women is your latest thing… oh nice work on Ducks head, very impressive work Eddie. Maybe next you will be getting drunk and punching your sister in the face." I could hear Edward growl into the phone.

"_I don't know what the fuck you are talking about, she stood in the way, I didn't aim the rock at her_." I laughed loud at his ridiculous cover up.

"Just be happy she doest need stitches, I don't think your Dad would find it as funny as my dad." With that I hung up the phone, vibrating with fury.

I walked to the walls to see how hard it would be to scrape the horrid paint off, it was stuck. The only thing to do would be to prime and paint, or sand that shit off.

I closed the door and walked back down the hall. I noticed another bedroom and stepped inside knowing it was Isabella's. She has a couple paintings on her wall. Sunsets, and waterfalls. I noticed a sketchpad on her desk so I walked in and grabbed it.

When I looked inside I damn near threw it down. It was a picture of Isabella on the floor, eyes wide and a pool of blood around her, above her was myself and Edward, we both had guns in our hands, and both were smoking, pointing at her. When I looked closer, she had two holes in her back. The detail was deadly, and if it wasn't so gruesome I might have even complimented her. It was all in pencil, but she had every detail so precise, so exact, that it was almost like she copied my features from a picture.

I put the sketch pad back quickly, not wanting to see any more brutal sketches, and went back downstairs.

Isabella was in the living room, laying on the couch. She was watching a blank television, looking like she was in a daze.

"I'll be back tomorrow to redo your Dad's room, there isn't much I can salvage, but it at least it wont look like that…" Isabella jumped at my voice, and started to protest, I put my hand up to stop her. "Listen Duck, I may not like you, but that shit is fucked up, I'm fixing it, just say thank you, and fuckin leave it at that."

Isabella's face went red and she looked down nodding. "Thank you." With that, I left heading to the hardware store for primer and paint.

I grabbed a dark blue paint for the walls, just winging it. I bought a new bed spread that was also a dark blue, I am so not a fucking home decorator, so it was better than nothing.

When I got home, I knew something wasn't right. I walked inside and everything was quiet, my Mom's car was gone, and she was always home by four, it was now ten after. I looked back outside and then noticed my father's truck was gone too. I looked around, running in and out of rooms, looking for something, anything that told me what happened. When I got into my room, I instantly noticed the note on my pillow.

_My Dearest Son,_

_I love you more than you will ever know, and I am so very sorry._

_I had to leave, and I know you are strong enough, to live without me, your father will not hurt you the way he used to, he cant, and he knows that. I will get in touch with you when I can. Please remember I love you, I know this will make you angry, I know this is not a noble thing for your Mother to do, but I had to leave or he will kill me, and if I take you with me, he will hunt me down. I love you._

_Love Always and Forever. Mom_

_XOXOXO_

She left, my mother left me. I ran into there bedroom and flung open the closet, and sure enough her side was empty. I was scared. I knew I would get the brunt of this if he cant find her, I would get the beats. Maybe I deserved this. My Mom was right, I could handle it better than she could.

I made sure dinner was on the table at 6:25, and sure enough My father was in the door at 6:30 on the dot.

I could tell he was disappointed that I had it right, he wanted to hurt me. "So your mom decided to leave you behind I see, guess you weren't that important after all." I didn't say anything, just choked my food back. "Did you hear me boy?" Dad bellowed slamming his fist on the table, making me tense.

"Yes Sir." I said simply. My father ate the rest of his food in silence, and by the time he was done, I could see him practically vibrating with anticipation, fuck this was going to be so bad.

It didn't take long, as soon as I cleared the table, Father laid into me. He tripped me and knocked me to the ground, kicking me in the ribs repeatedly, he broke three fingers on my left hand, and I was coughing up blood by the time he 'dismissed' me.

My ribs hurt like hell and I painfully reset my fingers. My nose was bleeding, but thank god, not broken. I lay in bed that night, both pissed at Mom, but also thankful, that she would not be hurt by him anymore.

Redoing Chief Swan's room was going to be hell now. But there was no way I could back down, out of everything I have fucked up and let down in my life. This would not be one of them.

**Hope you Enjoyed! Happy New Year Everyone!!**

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	6. Ch6 Red Handed!

**Stephenie Meyer Owns These Characters!**

**Enjoy!**

Chapter 6: Red Handed!

Bella's POV

I went to sleep shortly after James left, the pill I took, in full effect. I knew I would be up early, but it didn't matter, it would just give me more time to get ready.

By 5am I was up and my ankle was feeling a little better, so I decided to skip the heavy duty pain killer, and pop a couple extra strength Tylenol instead.

I took a long shower and then re wrapped my ankle, the way Dr. Cullen showed me how to. I ate a cinnamon bun that Esme had brought me, and I damn near moaned, it was delicious. So I grabbed another one and packed it in my lunch.

When I got to school, Edwards car was there, I knew this would be a bad day. I searched for James' vehicle, thinking maybe, just maybe he would tell Edward to simmer down… but it wasn't there.

Edward was standing at my locker when I got in the school, my palms started to sweat, heartbeat racing wildly.

"Hey Ugly, how's the head wound treatin ya? You should really learn how the fuck to duck… 'Duck'." He laughed at his own ridiculous joke. Like usual, the dude had no idea how the fuck to make a joke.

I stood in front of him, waiting for him to move. He just smirked at me and moved out of the way. I gasped and covered my mouth, feeling humiliated. _Ugly Duckling _was spray painted across my locker, with a picture of a grey baby duck underneath, my face glued over its face. I quickly composed myself and opened my locker. Grabbing my art folder, I turned and walked away.

The rest of my day was worse than usual. Almost everyone was pointing and laughing at me, shouting out ugly duckling. By the time I hit the parking lot after school, I was choking on my sobs. People were so cruel.

I jumped into my truck and pulled the door to close it, it didn't budge. I looked up and Edward was standing there smiling widely holding it open. "So did you have a good day 'ugly duckling'" I just bit my lip hard to keep from sobbing out.

"Just leave me alone Edward. I don't know why you hate me so much, but you are above and beyond sick and twisted." I choked out, looking at my door and not him. Edward growled and grabbed my arm painfully, next thing I know I was flying out of my truck, and landed face first on the ground.

"Keep talking back to me Bitch I dare…" Edward was cut off by two very angry voices behind him.

"Edward Anthony Cullen, what in the fuck are you doing?" Screamed Dr. Cullen.

"Oh my god EDWARD, what are you thinking?" Screamed Esme.

I looked up and Edward was tense and glaring at me. I could feel blood trickling from my nose. Dr. Cullen ran by Edward and picked me up from the ground, placing me on the seat of my truck, going into doctor mode. He used his top button up shirt to mop up the blood. My sobs that I was desperately trying to hold back, broke loose and it was free falling.

Edward was standing in the same spot, arms crossed, glaring at the ground, where I had been.

"Edward, your Mom is going to drive you home, give me your keys NOW." Edward jumped at his Dads volume and his eyes went wide. Obviously he wasn't used to getting yelled at.

"But Dad, I was just messing with her, she is overreacting." Edward whined out, like a fucking two year old.

"Are you kidding me, messing with her. I-no We raised you better than this, you were raised to respect and cherish women, not to abuse them." Esme said a sad, firm tone.

"What, Mom, I'm not abusive, god why would you say that." I snickered at that, because in my books he was definitely abusive, both physical, and mental.

"How long has this been going on?" Asked Carlisle staring at me, I didn't know what to say, I looked at Edward, wondering if it would be worse or better if I told the truth. "The truth Isabella? don't you worry about my Son ever again, he will not be bothering you." I nodded and took a deep breath.

"Just this last week." Said Edward before I could speak. I looked up and Edward had pleading eyes. So I did something I shouldn't have. I agreed.

"Yeah, just last week." Dr. Cullen nodded and held his hand out for Edwards keys. Once Edward and Esme walked away Dr. Cullen looked at me again.

"Your nose is not broken, thank god. If my son, ever does anything to you ever again, I need you to tell me." I nodded in agreement and thanked him for the use of his shirt.

After he walked away I say there for a couple minutes, hands on my steering wheel, scared out of my mind that Edward might get worse, now that his parents caught him red handed.

When I got to my place, James' car was there but he wasn't outside.

When I got to my door, sure enough it was unlocked. "Hello, James." I called out when I got inside.

"Yeah up here, don't worry about comin up its kinda a mess right now." I nodded even though he couldn't see it, and went to the kitchen to grab a water and a pain killer. My face was killing me, along with my ankle.

After rooting around in my freezer, I decided to heat up the lasagna that Esme had put in there. So I set my oven.

"Hey James I am heating up some Lasagna, it should be ready in half an hour if you want some." I called up to James. I heard a little bit of shuffling and moving around, then James walked down the stairs and came into view.

"Sure that sounds good…. Shit Duck, what happened to your face?" James questioned, though I was about to ask him the same thing. Both of his eyes were dark purple, his left hand was taped up, his lip was swollen.

"I should ask you the same thing." I said back. "But this was from Edward, when I decided to mouth him off again. I guess this new back bone thing, isn't suiting his needs at all." I smirked.

"Well fuck he's getting out of control… and I just walked into a wall, no big deal." My eyes widened, I knew he was lying, I seen him bruised up before, I also heard stories from Charlie, about his drunk father.

"You don't have to make shit up, if you don't want to tell me just say its none of my business. But either way, its not like I have anyone to say shit to." I shrugged my shoulders and turned around to walk to my living room, when James spoke.

"My Mom left yesterday, without me. My Dad decided to take it out on me, since he doesn't have her as a punching bag anymore. So I will be missing a lot more school, while I'm living under his roof." I turned back around and just stared at him horrified.

"I'm so sorry James, I wish there was something I could do, to help." I said sincerely.

"Well fuck, just let me crash here for a couple nights, give me time to heal before round two." James tried to say this like it was no big deal, but his eyes looked scared and sad.

"Okay, I guess so. But there needs to be some sort of ground rules…" James raised his eyebrows. "Like if you call me Duck one more fucking time I may have to cut your fucking pony tale off." James' eyes went wide before he snickered.

"Fine fine that is fair enough, no more Duck, I might slip but it wont be on purpose. But at school, don't expect me to hang out with you or talk to you."

"As long as you stop pushing me around, that's good enough for me." I said honestly. James nodded in agreement, before heading back upstairs. "I'll tell you when food is ready." I told his retreating form. He said okay and left the room.

After dinner, James took off to go grab some of his clothes. He said he was going to sneak into his room. I wished him luck, and hoped he didn't get caught.

James returned an hour later, looking disheveled and beyond upset, his knuckles were torn and bloody, his hair was everywhere, he had blood on the knees of his pants.

"Are you alright James?" I questioned, as he sat on the couch beside me, elbows on his knees, and put his head in his hands. He shook his head back and forth.

I sat there for a bit waiting for him to say something, after awhile he leaned back into the couch, and stared up to the ceiling.

"My Dad kicked me out, told me not to step foot in his house again." James said in a hollow, low voice.

_Well fuck, what was I supposed to do now_.

**Okay there ya go, Next will be James POV, going over what exactly happened between him and Daddy Dearest.**

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	7. Ch7 Fighting Back!

**Stephenie Meyer Owns These Characters!**

**Enjoy!**

Chapter 7: Fighting Back!

James POV

Being at Duc….err Isabella's place was a lot easier than I thought it would be. Dinner was easy, there was no awkward silence.

When I asked her if I could stay there for a couple days, I was prepared for her to tell me to go fuck myself. I deserved that and I knew it. So when she told me yes, just as long as I retire her nickname, I was pleasantly surprised.

I was on my way to my place to pick up some clothes, I knew if my father caught me, it would not be pretty, since I didn't make him supper today. I parked a little down the street and snuck into my window. I went through my drawers grabbing a weeks worth of clothes, hoping she wouldn't mind me there for that long. I opened my door and quietly walked to the bathroom that was right beside my door. I needed my razor and shower stuff.

I couldn't hear anything in the house, everything seemed so quiet, except for the low hum of the television downstairs. So when I walked back to my room and seen my Father standing in the doorway I damn near pissed myself. Fuck this was gonna be bad.

"So you trying to leave like your Mother, you ungrateful little prick." My father said before cuffing me across the face. My head swung to the side and pain shot through my cheek. "You are just like your stupid, pathetic, good for nothing Mother."

I snapped, at that moment, I lost it. My Mom was a loving caring woman. "Fuck you, the only stupid, pathetic, good for nothing person around here is you _Dad_." I sneered. My fathers eyes widened and his nostrils flared. He pulled his fist back about to strike, and I kicked him hard in his left knee. He screamed out and fell to the floor. I jumped on him before he could get back up, and I attacked. I punched him repeatedly in the head, knuckles stinging. His nose gushing, lips split. I was screaming while I was hitting him. "How does it feel, how the fuck does it feel, to be on the other side of the fists?" I roared as I continued to hit him. After several minutes, I got up and grabbed my bag, walking away. I thought it was done but it obviously wasn't.

My Father kicked his foot out, successfully tripping me. I jumped up quickly just in time, to move away from his foot to my face. I grabbed the back of his head and started to smash his head against my knees, alternating between left and right. By the time he had fallen to the ground, he was groaning and gasping, his face was close to looking like mush.

I grabbed my bag again and my father spoke. "Don't you ever step foot in this house again, you are no longer my Son, you are dead to me."

I laughed bitterly at him before walking over him to pack another duffel bag. I grabbed everything that was important, including my Mom's letter. And started walking down the stairs. I turned around to look at him, still on the floor, looking defeated and I was satisfied.

"Being dead to you is a good feeling father, knowing that I will never bleed or bruise from your hand again, makes me feel like the world is lifted from my shoulders. Do us all a favor and end your miserable drunk existence." I chuckled and turned around continuing down the stairs, and out of the house.

I had a week to find a full time job, and to find a place of my own.

Once getting back to Isabella's I had a hard time saying anything. My emotions were all over the place. What she said after I told her I was kicked out, shocked me

"Well, after you fix up my Dad's room, its just gonna sit there gathering dust. I wont ever use it. Move in there. But you will have to put in money towards food, everything else is already taken care of." She was staring at her hands the whole time, looking uncomfortable. She was so selfless it was almost painful.

"You don't have to do that Isabella, I don't want to make you feel uncomfortable in your own home. I'll figure something out." I told her, trying to let her off the hook.

She looked up at me finally, wide eyed, shaking her head. "Trust me James, I am doing this for myself as much as I am for you. I cant live here alone, I cant handle being in this house by myself…" she took a deep unsteady breath and continued. "So you are saving me from having a total fucking breakdown." I finally understood just how alone she was. She had absolutely no one. Not at school and now not at home. I felt horrible that I was partly to blame for this… emptiness inside of her.

So I agreed. "Okay then, I will move in here… thank you Du…. Umm thank you Isabella." She narrowed her eyes slightly then smiled, nodding. "Can we uh- uh keep this quiet, I would rather everyone not know." I felt badly for asking her, but I really couldn't handle people assuming we were a couple, that shit just didn't sit well with me.

"Yeah sure, I don't care if anyone knows or not." Isabella mumbled out, looking down and picking at her nails.

"Good, I'm gonna go grab my stuff from my car, and get back into that room, to finish up. I got the primer done earlier and a coat of the paint. I can probably finish the second coat tonight, but I cant sleep in there with the fumes still fresh… so where can I sleep."

Isabella was quiet for a minute, but when she spoke up her voice was shaky and unsure. "You sleep here, I'll sleep in my room, I have to start sleeping in there again sometime." I nodded and walked out to my car.

When I got back inside Isabella wasn't in the living room anymore. I sat my bags down by the doorway and headed back upstairs.

I had finished painting the walls at 2am. My ribs were aching and my fingers that were broken the day before now felt like they were going to fall off, with all the punches I fed to my father. I had the window open, airing the room out, and turned to tear the old bedding with red paint off of the bed.

I left the room quietly, closing the door behind me, so the smell didn't go through the rest of the house. I walked toward the stairs stopping suddenly when I heard Isabella whimpering. I walked to her door about to knock, but stopped myself. It wasn't my place to comfort her, nor did I know how to. I stood there for several minutes, at a loss for what to do. But I finally just walked away and headed to the living room, grabbing my pillow from one of my duffel bags I passed out in my clothes I had worn all day.

I woke up to the smell of bacon and eggs, my stomach growled loudly and I jumped up from the couch. Regretting it instantly, every bone and muscle in my body protesting, and aching. I walked slowly, into the kitchen Isabella was standing over the stove, flipper in hand and ear buds in her ears. She was swaying back and forth, and humming softly. I leaned against the doorframe, crossing my arms, smirking at her. She seemed totally at ease, not insecure, or closed off. She was obviously comfortable in these surroundings, I almost felt like an intruder… I guess in a way I was.

I cleared my throat loudly and Isabella jumped and turned around. She quickly pulled her ear buds from her ears. Her face flushing brightly. I chuckled and her and walked into the room. "And why aren't you at school." I asked smugly.

Isabella smirked. "Well I may be considered a geek, but the day I start going to that hell hole on the weekend, will be the day pigs fly." My eyes widened when she said it was the weekend.

"Fuck this week went by fast." I mused. Bella laughed dryly.

"Speak for yourself. This week has been the longest fucking week of my life." Bella said lowly.

"Shit I'm sorry Isabella, I didn't think….fuck I'm sorry." I cant believe I forgot about her father dying.

"No don't be, its fine… and please stop calling me Isabella, I hate that name almost as much as Duck, we are living together now James, get used to calling me Bella." She said with a small smile playing on her lips.

"Fine then _Bella_." I purred out. She rolled her eyes at me and put her ear buds back in finishing breakfast.

After we ate I headed up to finish the room, the only thing left was the bed spread. I pulled the bedding out of the package. It was a full bed in a bag.

I grabbed the fitted sheet and started with one corner. By the time I got to the third corner, it wouldn't stretch. I pulled and growled and started cussing, but it wouldn't fucking fit.

Bella came in several minutes later, asking what my issue was. "This fucking sheet wont fit, it says for queen size bed but it isn't fitting." Bella hobbled over and removed the sheet, turning it and refitting it. The damn thing slid on like a glove. "How in the fuck, did you do that?" I growled out, feeling partly frustrated and partly in aw.

Bella laughed loudly. "You had the wrong corner, no big deal." I couldn't help but smile at her laugh. I had never heard her laugh before. Bella started putting the rest of the bed together.

"Hey no you don't have to do that." I objected, trying to take the top sheet and quilt from her.

"I know I don't have to, I'm doing it because I want to. Why don't you do the pillows." I nodded and walked out of the room, going to grab my pillow from the couch. When I got back Bella was finished making my bed, and was sitting on the end, staring at the wall that had graffiti on it before. "You did great in here, it looks awesome James." She spoke quietly, and I could hear the emotion in her voice.

I felt bad for her, I didn't realize how hard this probably was for her. "Are you okay Bella." She nodded and stood up, opening one of her fathers drawers.

"I am going to throw all of his clothing in bags, are you alright with helping me get them to the attic?"

"Yeah for sure, did you need some help?" I asked knowing it would be hard.

"Um yeah maybe, that would be quite great actually." She said shyly.

We spent the rest of the day going through the Chiefs stuff. Half of it Bella decided to throw out, like his underwear and undershirts, old jeans and dress shirts. She kept some of his clothing, that he had worn often his favorite plaid shirt and a couple pair of his pants. I found a drawer that had a bunch of old pictures. Bella got a little choked up, so I excused myself and grabbed a cinnamon bun downstairs, since I didn't really know how to comfort her.

I had spent so many years making fun of and hating Bella, I was having a hard time around her. She really was a pleasant person to be around, it just felt odd, I didn't know how to act around her. I was almost afraid to get close to her, worried what my friends would say, or worse what Edward would say. Everything seemed so fucked up.

When I made my way back upstairs, the drawer was emptied into a box, that Bella was just taping up. She sniffled a little before looking at me. Her eyes were red rimmed, she looked so unbearably sad. I felt my stomach tighten, my heart clenched at her sadness. I walked over to her and pulled her into a hug, before I fully understood what the hell I was doing.

Bella stiffened when I pulled her to me, but after a couple seconds she melted into my body, she grabbed the front of my shirt fisting it in her tiny hands. Her body shook with her sobs as she broke down against me. I squeezed her tighter, and rested my chin on the top of her head. She felt good in my arms, not awful or uncomfortable at all. Her frame was small. My arms easily reached all the way around her.

We stood there for a good twenty minutes. Bella's sobs finally subsided and her grip loosened on my shirt. I rubbed her back reassuringly and she pulled away wiping her eyes. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to break down like that. It's been awhile since I've had anyone hold me." Her face went beat red and covered her face in her hands.

I pulled her hands away from her face and lifted her chin. "Don't apologize Bella, it's fine." I smiled lightly at her. And she nodded before pulling away and walking to the door.

"Everything is packed up, we just have to move it to the attic." She walked to the hall and pointed to the roof, there was a little door. "I cant reach it, but I'm sure your tall enough." Sure enough I reached up and easily got a hold of it. I pulled it down and a ladder came out. We quickly moved everything to the attic. It was a little chilly, and very dark, so there was no exploring.

After that Bella said a quiet goodnight and went into her room. I went back into my new room and unpacked my belongings, placing my clothing in the drawers and my shower stuff on top of the dresser.

I undressed, wearing only my boxers, and slipped into bed. Feeling absolutely exhausted, I was just about asleep, when I heard Bella's whimpers in the room beside mine. I got up and walked down the hall to her door, I knocked lightly and opened it. "Bella are you okay." I whispered into the room. She didn't answer, but she whimpered again. I walked into her room and up to her bed. Her hair was fanned around her head, her lips slightly parted. She was whimpering in her sleep.

My hand reached forward on its own accord and brushed her cheek softly. She leaned into it, and I could feel little sparks of electricity going through my hand and up my arm. I felt like my stomach had a million butterfly's in it.

I moved my hand away and Bella burrowed her face where my hand was. I turned back and walked towards the door, "James" I heard Bella say my name, I turned around and she was doe eyed and staring at me. I all of a sudden felt very naked as Bella's eyes were raking over my naked torso. I cleared my throat and her eyes snapped back to mine, I could see her face turning red even in the dark room. She covered her face before speaking. "Oh god I'm so sorry, I was practically eye fucking you…" My eyes widened at her words, definitely not expecting her to say that. "What are you doing in here." her voice turning accusatory, which just annoyed me.

"I came to fucking molest you Bella, Jesus Christ…" I growled out. "I heard you whimpering, so I came to check on you. I realized you were asleep so I was leaving, when you woke up."

"Oh, sorry." Was all she said. I shrugged my shoulders, turned and left.

I crawled into bed once more. Feeling more than a little fatigued. I was out in seconds.

I dreamt of some weird shit that night. It was like Bella's drawing, but instead of her laying on the floor it was my Mom, and instead of Me and Edward, it was Me and My Father.

I woke with a start, sitting straight up, sweat pouring off of me, my breathing was ragged. Seeing my Mom's lifeless body on the floor, was something I hope never truly happens. I grabbed some clean clothes and boxers, and headed for the bathroom. It was closed but my stupidity, and lack of thinking in the early hours, I thought nothing of it. When I opened the door, the sight was beyond incredible.

Bella was facing away from me drying her arms, she was naked. Completely naked. Her hair was dripping wet down her back, her perfect perky ass her long lean legs. I snapped out of it when Bella gasped. I snapped my head up to her face staring back at me. "Fuck, I'm so fucking sorry. So sorry." I practically yelled before slamming the door and sprinting back to my room. I had a hard as a rock boner, that was not going anywhere until I dealt with it. So I leaned up against my door and dropped my shorts, I wrapped my right hand around my erection and closed my eyes, thinking back to Bella's sexy ass in the bathroom.

It didn't take me long to get off, and I came violently into my other hand, gritting my teeth, whispering out Bella's name like a fucking mantra as my orgasm racked my body. I kept as quiet as possible, and used my dirty shirt from yesterday to clean the evidence from my hand.

It seems living with Bella, may be harder than I thought…. In several different ways.

****

Hmm Do you think James was quiet enough!?! He he he

Hope you guys enjoyed, I am having a blast with this story…

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	8. Ch8 Hot Showers, Cold Breezes!

**Stephenie Meyer Owns These Character!**

**Enjoy!**

Chapter 8: Hot Showers, Cold Breezes!

Bella's POV

I felt a tingle in my cheek, and moved into it. The feeling was wonderful. Then it was gone. I woke quickly looking around my dark room, and there was James walking away. When I said his name he turned around, and in that moment I thought I'd died and gone to heaven, the man had the body of a god.

He had crazy abs, nice big arms, even his legs were built nicely, no chicken legs here. James cleared his throat and I looked up, feeling humiliated with my eye fucking. After he left my room I felt like an idiot. I fell back to sleep soon after that, and instead of dreaming of my fathers death, I dreamt of James, his body hovering over mine, his hands roaming over my most sensitive places. Kissing down my neck, his hand finding my center. I was moaning and writhing feeling so close to something, but I couldn't quite figure out what. I woke up panting heavily and my panties soaked.

I know how things work, I have explored myself a time or two. But never in my life had I ever been so turned on. I jumped up and grabbed some clothes, needing a hot shower. My shower was awkward with my sore ankle, but it helped take my mind of the crazy sex dream I had.

I was standing there, enjoying the heat of my bathroom, slowly drying myself, starting with my arms, when I felt a cold breeze, I looked over my shoulder and there was James staring directly at my very naked backside. I gasped and James looked up at me. After apologizing very loudly, he slammed the door, and I could hear him running down the hall.

I shook my head and could feel my cheeks heat up all the way to my hairline. I felt ugly, the guy damn near screamed and ran away. I dried off and got dressed quickly. I opened the door and noticed James had dropped his clothing and towel. Good god he was in a hurry.

I swallowed my embarrassment and walked to his door, to tell him the bathroom was free, but before I could I heard a soft grunt. He sounded like he was right against the door. Against my better judgment I leaned forward and place my ear softly against it, I could hear his breathing it was ragged and quick, I could hear a slight repetitive movement, then I clued in oh my god…. He was masturbating. Only inches from me, I should have walked away, I should have left him alone to do his private business…. But I couldn't stop myself.

I closed my eyes and imagined him thinking about me. God I was sick…. His breathing was becoming faster and so were his movements. Next think I knew he was whispering something, I listened harder and then I heard my name, fall off his lips, while getting off. Damn I was turned on and a little stunned. I tip toed away and went into my room, closing it a little loudly to let him know I was out.

I lay down in my bed for several long minutes, I heard James come out of his room, and I heard the shower turn on. I decided to go make breakfast.

I was making French toast and when James came down, I could feel the awkward tension. I stayed starring at the frying pan, watching the butter sizzle. All I could think about was James cumming to my name. My name.. James cleared his throat behind me and spoke. "I'm really sorry about walking in on you this morning." I personally had completely forgotten about him walking in on me.

I shrugged my shoulders and turned around. "No harm done, it was my own fault for not locking the door." I gave him a small smile and looked up at him through my eyelashes… feeling very bashful. James eyes widened then he nodded. The tension simmered down after that, besides my sexual frustration. I needed to take care of myself later, like James did. I groaned at the thought and closed my eyes, having a hard time concentrating.

"Is everything okay, is it your ankle?" Asked James, he was closer now, only a couple feet away.

"Umm yeah, just thinking.. About..stuff….?" I trailed off feeling my all too familiar blush. James nodded and leaned over me, I could feel his chest against my upper back. My panties just fucking ruined, my hormones in overdrive. I don't know what I was expecting, maybe for him to rub up against me, whisper sweet nothings in my ear… well none of that happened. James quickly grabbed a cup that was in the cupboard above my head and said a quick sorry before moving to the sink. I finished up the French toast and set the table.

Breakfast was quiet, and a little uncomfortable. After finishing up I grabbed both our plates and put them in the sink, filling it up. I was about to put my hands in the water when James stopped me. "Let me… you cooked, the least I can to is clean." I nodded saying thanks, and took off to my room as quickly as my ankle would allow me to.

I knew if I didn't take care of my built up sexual tension I may explode or make a fool out of myself and dry hump James.

I locked my door and lay down on my bed, unbuttoning my khaki pants, thankful they were loose enough that I didn't have to take them off. I made sure to be quiet, no noises. Only my heavy breathing. I could feel myself getting close but couldn't seem to get myself over the edge, I was getting frustrated, needing the release. I closed my eyes and pictured James holding his erection moaning my name, that did it. My toes curled, my back lifted off the bed, it was intense and sudden. The heals of my feet pushed into my bet as I was cumming, which caused my euphoria to crash down quickly and I yelled out in pain, my ankle screaming at me. I could hear James running up the stairs and my heart took off. I started to button my pants up quickly pissed at myself for not being able to do anything right. "Bella are you ok?" Yelled James as he turned my door handle. Thankful it was locked.

"I'm fine." I squeaked out, fighting with my top button. James knocked on my door again.

"Bella open up." James said a little louder. Sounding slightly panicked. So with a red face, disheveled hair, and of course my top button of my khakis undone I unlocked and opened my door. I ran my hands over my hair again. Feeling beyond humiliated. "Are you okay…?" He trailed off, seeing my appearance. His eyes flickered in understanding and his mouth open and closed like a fish out of water. My face turned even more red. He looked down and noticed my button.

I clasped my hands together in front of me, successfully blocking his view from that. "I … um… fell." I stated lamely. Feeling like an idiot.

James looked amused and nodded. His composure coming back. "That must have been some fall." He said while leaning close to me. I felt his breath hit my face, and my eyes closed shut. James chuckled and they snapped open again. The guy was having way to much fun at my embarrassment. I put my palm against his forehead and pushed him back.

"Okay James enough poking fun at me, get outta here, I have homework." I said before shutting my door once more.

"Oh is that what the kids are calling it now a days." Laughed James through my door. I just growled and didn't say anything. "Alright, alright I can take a hint, have fun with your _homework_." With that I could hear him retreat back downstairs.

I flopped back down on my bed feeling horrified. I cant believe I did that, during the day, with James downstairs. I shook my head at my stupidity.

I lay there for awhile, and eventually dosed off. I woke up to James banging on my door. "Go away, I don't want any." I mumbled. Rolling onto my side, facing away from the door. I could see there was barely any light outside now. James opened my door, letting the hall light spill in.

"Come on Bella, get up, I made supper." James said while flicking my light on. I got up lazily, and hobbled downstairs. "I made steak, potatoes, and steamed carrots, so I hope you like it." I breathed in deeply, loving the smells.

"Mmm it smells great." I stated, before sitting in front of a massive plate. I kept moaning and complimenting all through the meal. That man can cook, the steak was melt in your mouth delicious. James just snickered at me, saying a thank you when I complimented.

I sat there for a couple minutes, full and satiated. Once the dishes were finished, I walked to the living room and sat down. "So you wanna watch a movie." James asked. "Because there is fuck all on TV and I really don't want to go out tonight."

"Umm sure, you can pick one, I like them all." James sat in front of the movie stand for a bit, humming and hawing over which movie to watch. He settled on an old Jean Claude Van Damme movie. Kickboxer. I lay down and scrunched in a ball so I didn't invade James' space. I got through most of the movie, but ended up falling asleep, I woke up to James carrying me up the stairs. "I can walk." I mumbled out, feeling a little out of it.

James smiled and shook his head. "Too late, we're already there." He lay me down and covered me in my blankets. "Goodnight Bella, see you in the morning." I mumbled a goodnight back and fell back to sleep before he was even out of my room.

I woke up to my alarm blaring and shut it off quickly. I stretched feeling great from all the sleep I had. I grabbed some clothes and had a quick shower, making sure the door was locked.

It wasn't until I made my way downstairs that I noticed there were no other sounds in the house except my own. I peeked out the window, and noticed right away that James' car was gone. Then reality came crashing back into me. He doesn't want to be seen with me, and doesn't want to have to acknowledge me at school. I tried not to let it bother me and got ready for school, grabbing the last cinnamon bun for my lunch.

As I got to school, I seen James car parked nicely beside Edward's. Ugh as soon as I think his name I feel sick to my stomach. Just praying he doesn't do anything, maybe his parents talked sense into him.

I got to my first class without being disturbed, I knew I wouldn't be so lucky since he was in my next classes. Besides sneering at me and calling me Duck, Edward didn't say much to me, that is until his class with James.

"So Duck, how's your face feeling?" Edward asked snickering. I didn't even bother to say anything. I was just done with talking back to him, it only made things worse. "Hmm what's wrong Duck, don't feel like talking back today?… or did you finally learn your fucking role?" Edward spoke this time closer to the back of my head. I could feel his presence, it was an uncomfortable zap in the air, I was tense waiting for him to hit me, or push me out of my seat. "Look at this James, ugly duckling wont play with us, how sad." Edward said in a mocking sad tone. I was hoping that maybe, James would tell him to knock it off, but instead he snickered and shook his head, I could see him in the corner of my eye. "Fuck I want to hit you so bad, just to get a reaction, you piss me off when you ignore me." Edward was sounding angry now and I shrunk against my desk. Trying to move as far away from him as possible.

"Jesus Christ Edward, shut the fuck up, I'm trying to hear the teacher." James ground out.

Edward snickered and told him to stop being a fuckin bitch. "besides, I'm having fun with my friend Duck." Edward sneered. He grabbed a hold of my ponytail and tugged on it slightly. I tried to pull away but Edward held tight. "Do you have any fucking idea how much shit I got in because of you… huh do you? You ugly fucking bitch. I was grounded all weekend, I missed a party, which means I didn't get the opportunity of getting my cock sucked… do you want to suck my cock Duck." My eyes widened and I ripped my ponytail from him, crying out as he tried to hold on.

"I would never suck your cock even if it was the last one on earth Edward Cullen, and that is called sexual harassment." I whispered loudly. Edward's eyes widened and narrowed.

"Don't worry bitch, I wouldn't trust you with my dick anyway." He pushed my head roughly and my forehead hit my desk. I didn't even cry, I didn't do anything. I just got up and left. I was done with his shit, I was done with school, and I wanted to kick James the fuck out for not sticking up for me… but I already knew he wouldn't, he told me he wouldn't. It still hurt.

I went straight to my truck and drove home, not even worrying about my homework, I didn't even know if I was going to go back.

When I got home I took one of the pain killers, not because I was in pain, but just because it numbed me out, made me drowsy, made everything easier. "Maybe I can twist my ankle again and get some more." I mused to myself.

I went upstairs to my room and flung my stupid jeans off, I threw on my comfy old ratty shorts and wife beater, and crawled into bed. I grabbed my I-pod from my bedside table and threw my ear buds in my ears. Blocking everything out but my music and my pain killer high.

Later that night James stormed into my room ripping my ear buds out, glaring down at me. "What the fuck do you want?" I bit out, still angry about school.

"Well I have been banging on the door for the past three fucking hours because I don't have a god damn key, and I had to climb through the kitchen window which I just realized wasn't locked. I thought something fucking happened to you Bella." He was looking angry and worried all at once.

I snorted at him. "Wow now you care, that would have been great fucking help when your homeboy there was sexually harassing me, and pulling chunks of my hair out." I huffed and rolled over, away from him, not interested in discussing anything. "Listen James, there is a spare key hanging up by the door, keep that one…" I readjusted my pillow and closed my eyes, hoping he would leave. No such luck.

"I fuckin told you I didn't want anyone to know that I was living here, and I told you I'm not your friend, so what the fuck is the big deal Du.. Bella." I rolled my eyes when Duck almost slipped out. Feeling like a complete moron to even think for a second, that he could be interested in me. I will always be Ugly Duckling to him, and he just proved it.

"No your completely right James, I don't know what my problem is, its just been a rough week." I said very monotone.

James growled and cussed under his breath before walking out. I squeezed my eyes shut not wanting to cry over this stupid boy. Telling myself that no matter how rude he is to me, he has had it so much worse.

I was dozing off again, when James stormed back into my room flicking my light on. "Jesus fuck James, you cant keep barging into my room like you own it, what the fuck do you want." I was speaking into my pillow so it sounded muffled and disoriented.

"I know you are helping my Bella and I appreciate it I really do, but I'm not your superman, I'm not someone who is going to swoop in and save your day. So please don't lay the blame on me, don't put that weight on my shoulders." I looked over and James was standing there with his arms crossed and staring at me, his face void of any emotion.

"I already said I was sorry James, I know its not up to you, I was just pissed because Edward is getting worse. Don't worry I don't expect anything from you okay." I said seriously, partly because I wanted him to get the fuck out of my room, and also because he was right, he sure wasn't my superman. He didn't even care about me,

James nodded and shut my light out, leaving me alone in my sanctuary.

**Okay there is another one, I hope you enjoyed!**

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	9. Ch9 Conflicted!

**Stephenie Meyer Owns These Characters!**

**Enjoy!**

Chapter 9: Conflicted!

James POV

Once I carried Bella to bed, I went into my room. I didn't know why I carried her to bed, I could have just woken her up, but she seemed so peaceful.

All I could think about was Bella's disheveled appearance when she opened her door, her cheeks flushed and her skin shiny with a light film of sweat, her top button undone, her appearance screamed 'I just had an orgasm' This woman was driving me crazy. Her naked body in the morning, her orgasm glow in the afternoon. I was close to a breaking point… already.

I woke up to my cell phone alarm early the next morning. I got ready as quiet as possible then I left the house. I headed over to Edwards as I usually did in mornings. Edward answered the door with a scowl. "Hey dude, what's up with you?" I questioned as Edward stomped away.

"I tried fuckin calling you all weekend, where the fuck were you?" He growled out running his hands through his hair.

"What the fuck man I was busy, I didn't think I had to answer to you. What's your beef?" I asked getting pissed that he was treating me like his fucking property.

"Sorry man…" Edward said sheepishly. "Long weekend, Ugly Duckling got me grounded, so I didn't get to go to Lauren's party." I raised my eyebrow, questioning on how Bella was to blame. Edward rolled his eyes. "I got caught throwing her out of her truck, she landed on her face, there was a little blood, but the parents seen, and went on a war path." My eyes widened Bella had said Edward was to blame, but she never did say how he did it.

"since when did you start physically attacking women?" I asked him, feeling disturbed, and thinking about what my Mom went through. Edward laughed, loud hysterical laugh.

"That Duck, is anything but a woman." I wanted to disagree, but decided against it. I was no longer going to pick on Bella, but I sure in the fuck wasn't going to protect her either… especially from my supposed best friend.

So when we were in class with Bella and Edward grabbed her ponytail I bit my tongue. I tried to get him to stop, without letting him know it was for Bella's sake, telling him I was trying to hear the teacher, but Edward just laughed. So I sat back and let it happen, with clenched fists.

When he mentioned to Bella about sucking his dick, I opened my mouth to tell him to shut the fuck up. Feeling crazy protective all of a sudden, but Bella spoke up first. After getting her head smashed against the table Bella just got up and left, with a blank and eerily calm mask on her face.

I turned to Edward, gritting my teeth. "I should set you and my Dad up, you would be a great pair, it seems you have a lot in common."

"What the fuck does that mean." He asked in a angry tone.

"Well you both like to make women feel weak, and helpless. And you both love to hurt and pick on women with low self esteem." I said looking straight ahead.

"Keep talking to me like that James, and you wont have anywhere to run to, next time your Dad lays you out." He was smirking at me, probably waiting for me to cower like I usually do when he brings that shit up, but instead I laughed.

"Hmm I don't think that will be a problem anymore, and I no longer need to hide in your home. So if you want to continue treating me like trash, I just might not take it anymore." I looked back at him, our eyes meeting. He knows I can take him if I had to.

Edward shook his head and looked to the front of the class, obviously changing his tune. "No worries man, I know I keep fucking up with Duck, but I cant help it, she is so fucking pathetic." I didn't say anything back, I didn't need to. I had a lot of shit to reconsider, and being friends with Edward, was one of them.

I skipped my last classes needing to head back home, knowing that's where Bella was. Sure enough when I pulled in Bella's truck was in the driveway. I walked up and tried to open the door, but it was locked. I knocked on the door loudly and called out her name. There was no answer, I figured maybe she was pissed so I sat outside for a bit, I kept going back and knocking every twenty minutes. Abut two hours later I started to get really worried.

I walked over to where her window was, and started throwing little rocks at it. Trying to get her attention. Nothing. So I checked all the downstairs windows, and the kitchen one was open. I quickly scrambled inside, making sure not to knock any of the dishes that were on the counter.

I ran to the living room, calling out Bella's name. Worst case scenarios running through my head. When I got up stairs I burst into her room seeing her immediately. There she was sleeping with her headphones in. I went from worried to pissed right off in one second flat.

I ripped her ear buds from her ears and she practically snarled at me, asking what the fuck I want. When I told her I was worried she snorted and said something about needing that reaction at school.

I instantly felt guilty but I had also warned her that I didn't want anyone to know. I told her this much, almost calling her 'Duck' in my fit of anger. Bella's shoulders deflated and when she spoke she sounded emotionless, almost dead. "No your completely right James, I don't know what my problem is, its just been a rough week."

I growled and said 'fuck' as I stormed out of her room closing her door.

I paced back and forth in the hallway outside her door, pissed at her and pissed at myself. After awhile I sat against her door, my head in my hands, I felt beyond helpless, not knowing how to act.

I needed her, as fucked up as it was, right now I needed her. She was helping me through this really shitty time. But I couldn't be her savior, I couldn't be her superman, I could barely keep myself together right now, I cant take care of her too.

I stood up and burst into her room again, this time turning her light on. Bella snapped at me again, pissed that I keep barging in on her personal space. But I had to get it out, I needed her to hear me, and understand why I cant stick up for her.

"I know you are helping my Bella and I appreciate it I really do, but I'm not your superman, I'm not someone who is going to swoop in and save your day. So please don't lay the blame on me, don't put that weight on my shoulders." I said this in a very calm tone, trying not to let my emotions get in the way.

Bella took a deep breath and looked at me. Her eyes looking sad, defeated, and so lonely. I wanted to run to her, but it just wasn't my place. "I already said I was sorry James, I know its not up to you, I was just pissed because Edward is getting worse. Don't worry I don't expect anything from you okay." I nodded, not really having a response. I turned off her light and left her alone. I walked downstairs and made a bowl of cereal, not in the mood to make anything, and went to the living room, to turn the television on.

"James, wake up." I heard a soft voice, and my arm was being nudged. "Wakey wakey sunshine, your gonna be late for school." I jumped up quickly looking at my surroundings. I was on the couch, I didn't even remember passing out. "School starts in twenty minutes, you might want to get going." Said Bella, her arms crossed and her face still void of emotion. I finally took in her appearance, she was wearing some tiny brown shorts and a white wife beater, her hair was in a messy bun, and she had little fuzzy slippers on. I was staring at her pale, long legs, when Bella cleared her throat.

My head snapped up as I put my hands in my lap, successfully covering my erection. "Aren't you going to school?" I questioned. Bella just shook her head and turned to leave. "Why aren't you going to school Bella? Your gonna end up behind in class." Bella turned back smirking.

"We are roommates James, not friends, my tardiness at school is none of your business." with that she walked away, and I heard her walking back upstairs and slamming her door shut.

I shook my head, wondering why I was being so nosey, she was right it was none of my business. I clearly told her several times that we were not friends and I didn't want that on my shoulders. So why in the fuck was it bothering me so much.

I ran to my room and changed quickly, pissed that I couldn't get a shower in. My raging hard on was finally gone. I grabbed the key by the door and locked it before leaving.

School was slow and Edward was on a war path, because Bella didn't show.

"That stupid bitch ruins all my fun." Said Edward as he slammed his fists down in the cafeteria. "I got her locker painted all nice and she didn't even show, the janitor with have cleaned it off by tomorrow." He looked so angry and I was sickened by the person he is becoming. I stood up abruptly not able to be around him another second. "Where the fuck are you going." Edward bellowed pissed that I was leaving during his rant.

I turned around fuming mad and lost it right there, in front of a shitload of people. "I am going anywhere that you aren't Ed man. Bella's Dad just died a week ago, and here you are making her life a living hell. I get that we have been asses to her, and I was all for making fun of her. But hitting her, and breaking into her Dead Fathers room to make it look like a murder scene… that shit is fucked up. I cant be around you anymore. I feel like every fucking second I spend with you is tainting me you fuck nut. Leave Bella alone, she doesn't deserve the shit and abuse you have been dishing to her lately. IT HAS TO STOP." I bellowed out the last part, everyone staring wide eyed. Jasper was smiling and nodding, obviously agreeing.

Edward started laughing hard. "Bella, when the fuck did you start calling the ugly pathetic Duck, Bella."

So I went against everything I was going to do at that moment. "She is far from pathetic you douche. After everything I have put her through, she is letting me live at her home, because I was kicked out of mine. She swallowed her fucking pride and let me, one of the guys who has been torturing her for years, into her home. You need to stop attacking her, its getting out of hand now." I could feel myself getting upset, I wanted to punch him in the head.

His smile faltered and his eyes went hard. "Your fucking the ugly Duck aren't you? You are banging ugly, Jesus James you have enough women around, I'm sure they can help you." I threw my hands up in the air feeling exasperated.

"You are just so mental now a days Eddie man. I ain't fucking Bella, I cleaned up the mess you and Emmet made in Chief Swans room, and I'm staying in there, we are roommates. I kept it a fucking secret cause I didn't want to hear you make fun of me, but really Ed, the only person that should be pushed around and made fun of is you. The shit you do to her, your physically harming her now, you smashed her head against the desk in class and asked her to suck your cock." Alice gasped beside Edward, and Emmet looked down, obviously ashamed about the Chiefs room.

"Edward, what does he mean physically harming her." Said Emmet as he placed one of his big hands on Edwards shoulder. Emmet was massive, and could damage either one of us easily. Edward stiffened and shook his head. "Fuck Edward, your laying your hands on her? What the hell is wrong with you. I cant believe your not feeling sick to your stomach for laying your hands on her. If I ever hear of or see you hurting any girls including Duck, I will rip you apart. I don't believe in abusing women, and neither should you." Emmet was shaking his head looking remorseful and weary. Edward had his head in his hands, his shoulders slumped.

I turned around and walked away, not interested in hearing anymore, thankful that Emmet has enough of a brain to know not to hurt women. I went to the rest of my classes, and the one with Edward was quiet, he didn't say anything, he just sat there looking sick and remorseful. I didn't say anything to try to make him feel better, because really, I had enough on my plate.

When I got back home the house was quiet. I walked right up to Bella's room and knocked on her door. I heard her grumble and so I went in. She was laying on her bed, still in her deadly, barely there shorts and shirt, reading. I sat down on her desk chair which was a couple feet from her bed. She still hadn't looked up. I felt nervous, and her lack of clothing was not helping at all. "So what are you reading?" I asked.

She snickered and held the book up for me to read the title. _Wuthering Heights _I nodded and she went back to reading. So I sat there watching her, waiting for her silent treatment to falter. It took another twenty minutes and me humming a toneless tune for her to finally snap her book shut and look at me. "Ok James what do you want?" She said in an annoyed clipped tone. I couldn't help but smile at her attitude, she was definitely getting more of a backbone.

"I just wanted to apologize to you. I have been fucking horrid these past five years, and I don't have any excuse for it, I cant take it back, all I can do is apologize and hope that one day you can forgive me." Bella's eyes widened and she was biting her bottom lip. I didn't lose the eye contact, I kept it, wanting her to know just how sincere I was being.

Her eyes started to water and she leaned forward wrapping her arms around her legs, before speaking. "Thank you James, I- really thank you." She said blinking furiously, trying to stop her tears it seemed. I didn't think she would become so emotional, and I didn't like seeing her upset, just like last time my gut twisted uncomfortably. A single tear slid down her cheek, and I instantly got up and walked over to her bed, I sat down beside her and ran the pad of my thumb over her cheek, successfully removing the offending tear. She smiled kindly and said thank you again, before throwing her arms around me. We sat there like that for awhile, my upper body twisted sideways while my lower body sat forward, not comfortable at all, but I couldn't bring myself to let her go. So I kept my arms wrapped around her, holding her close to me.

After awhile I pulled away slightly so my mouth was by her ear. "Are you okay now Bella?" She shivered slightly and nodded. The atmosphere in the room changed. I could feel her breathing pick up, and also my own. I ran my nose along her cheek breathing in her strawberry and vanilla scent. I moved back and looked into her eyes, the same need and want I was feeling was in her eyes.

I pulled my hands from her back moving them up her arms until I was cupping her face. I moved closer to her and Bella's eyes slid shut. The minute my lips touched hers, my eyes closed too. Her lips were warm and soft. She moaned against me, the vibration went straight through me and straight to my cock. I reached down and grabbed her hips, pulling her onto my lap so she was straddling me. We both gasped as her center was pushed against my hardness. I swept my tongue across her lower lip begging for entrance, when she opened and slid her hot little tongue out I groaned and deepened the kiss. Her hands reached up and gripped my hair. Then I stopped. I pulled my lips away wondering what the fuck I was doing. I knew this was so wrong. I leaned my forehead against Bella's and tried to catch my breath.

"Fuck I'm sorry Bella I shouldn't have done that." I said as I got up and lightly deposited her on the bed. I looked at her again, rosy cheeks and swollen lips, looking so totally fuckable. I shook my head apologized once more and left the room.

I walked straight to my room and closed my door. I didn't know how to feel. My mind was in a whirlwind of thoughts, my dick hard as a fucking rock, I was about to undo my pants and take care of business when my cell phone went off. I grabbed it and it said text from Vickie I opened it up read it.

_Cum C Me Babe!! I need a release!_

I stared at my phone, trying to decide whether or not to go…Take care of it myself, or get help?!?

**Hmm What does he do?!?**

**Review Please!!**


	10. Ch10 What A Day!

**Stephenie Meyer Owns These Characters!**

**Enjoy!!**

Chapter 10: What A Day!

James POV

I quietly walked downstairs and grabbed a bottle of water, before slipping my shoes on, as I opened the door I heard a noise behind me, I spun around and there was Bella, standing in the doorway of the living room. She looked upset and I had to clench my fists to keep from running to her. "Are you leaving?" She asked, she knew what I was doing, I could see it in her eyes, so I just nodded once and she turned around, heading back to the living room. "Make sure to take your key." She threw over her shoulder before she disappeared behind the wall.

I ran back up to my room, grabbing the key, and flew out of the door, before I could change my mind. I got to Victoria's place in ten minutes, shut my car off and sat there breathing heavily. 'Fuck' I cursed, holding my head in my hands, trying to decide whether to stay or to go back home. I heard a knock at my window, and jumped. Looking up, I could see Vickie smirking at me, wearing a very short, green baby doll dress.

She opened my door for me, and got in, straddling me. Closing the door behind her, in seconds her hands were in my hair, her tongue down my throat. She was grinding against me. I could smell her arousal, clear as day in the small space. But as soon as I closed my eyes, it was Bella grinding against me. Images from earlier still fresh in my head.

I leaned my head back, successfully pulling our mouths apart, but instead of her stopping she kissed, bit and licked down my neck. "Fuck Vickie I cant do this." I said, while grabbing a hold of her arms and pushing her back slightly. "I have so much going on in my head right now, this just cant happen, I'm sorry." I said. Her eyes turned hard and she reached down grabbing my dick through my pants. "What the fuck." I said through gritted teeth.

Vickie smiled sweetly. "I want to fuck, so fuck me." I let go of her arms and instead grabbed her hands, pulling them away, from my now very painful erection, seriously reconsidering just having a quick fuck. I shook my head knowing that wasn't good for anyone.

"I said I cant, so stop. Jesus fuck Vickie." I was getting pissed and she still had an amused expression on her face. "What." I yelled out. Her grin faltered, and she huffed pulling her hands away and crossing her arms.

"Its Duck isn't it, you got a thing for the Ugly Duckling." I opened my door, and gently lifted her off of me, and deposited her outside my car.

"You shouldn't fuckin call her that, she isn't Ugly." I gritted out. Victoria laughed and tried to look like she didn't care, but her eyes said something different. I hurt her feelings. "Listen, I'm sorry I came here, I didn't mean to upset you Vickie. I don't know how the fuck I feel about her anymore. I wish I didn't like her, it would be a hell of a lot easier." Victoria looked down at the ground, pulling her too short dress down, obviously starting to feel self conscious cause I turned her down. "You look fucking hot by the way, that dress is smokin." I said to her, her face brightened slightly and she stopped fidgeting. Victoria uncomfortable was a painful thing. I didn't want to be the one to take her confidence away.

"Thanks, but I already know I'm smokin." She shrugged like it was no big deal. "Are you sure you don't want any of this." she said while lifting her dress up, showing off her bare pussy, no panties. I groaned and shut my eyes. Willing myself to stay fucking strong. I opened my eyes and Victoria was smiling widely. "Well get your ass out of here then, go back to Duck." She said waving me away, with a smirk. I glared at her and she laughed. "Fine fine, _Bella_." She drew the name out, and turned around. I sat there to make sure she got inside safely and then took off down the street.

I closed the house door, and locked it. I peeked into the living room, but Bella wasn't in there. I figured she went back to bed. I wanted to talk to her and I had only been gone for no more than thirty minutes, I was sure she would still be awake.

I walked upstairs and was about to knock when I realized I really needed to change. My pants had a nasty stain on it from a panty less Vickie. So I decided just to shower and take care of the massive stiffy I had, before I had a serious talk with Bella.

Once the warm shower water hit me, I wrapped my hand around my cock and started to stroke. I closed my eyes and leaned my forehead against the cool tile. The hot water hitting my back.

I was thinking about her once again in my lap, grinding against me, this time we were both naked. I enter her slowly, her breasts pressed against my chest, nipples hard as pebbles. My hands gripping her hips, setting the pace. I could feel myself getting close, started pumping faster, thinking of thrusting into Bella fast and deep. A couple more thrust, and I came hard. I clenched my jaw grunting and moaning as I spilled my seed onto the tile wall. I stood there for a couple minutes, chest heaving, and feeling exhausted. Once out I grabbed the only towel, which was a damn hand towel and started to dry myself off. It was then that I realized, I forgot clothes.

I rolled my eyes at my stupidity too worried about getting myself off I forgot my towel and clothes. I put my ear to the door, making sure I couldn't hear anything I didn't want this conversation to be had while I had no clothes on, that would just cause a lot of trouble. I was satisfied with the silence and opened the door, holding the hand towel across the front of me. One step out of the bathroom and Bella's door opened. I turned towards her, so she couldn't see my naked ass, and I stood there frozen.

Bella looked up at me and gasped, her face went red and her breathing picked up. She was no longer wearing her shorts. It was just the same top and a pair of black, boy cut panties. I could feel myself hardening at the sight in front of me. Bella was 'eye fucking' me again, her eyes lustful. When she seen my neck, her lust faded and she instantly looked upset. My eyebrows furrowed and she said a quick sorry, backing into her room and slamming the door, successfully cutting me off of that amazing view.

I went to my room and threw on a pair of boxer shorts and grey jogger pants, with a black muscle shirt. I was about to walk out of my room, but caught something in my reflection, on the mirror that was on the back of the door, a small bite mark on my neck, it was bruising. That would be why Bella looked upset, she seen Vickie's bite mark, obviously thinking I fucked her. God this day was just getting more and more fucked up.

I could do one of two things, I could either wait till tomorrow and let her sit there thinking I stopped kissing her to go fuck another woman, or I could storm into her room once again and explain how much of a fuck up I really am.

I opened my door and stomped down the hallway. I knocked on Bella's door loudly and turned the knob to open it but it didn't budge. Damn it was locked. "Bella, can I talked to you?" I asked, my face practically pressed right against the door. She didn't answer, and I couldn't hear movement, so I knocked again. "Bella, please can I talk to you?" I was starting to whine and I knew it. I heard Bella growl on the other side of the door. And I continued to jiggle the door knob and knock. Finally I could hear her walking towards the door, so I let go of the handle.

She swung the door open and glared at me. "What do you want James?" Her voice was quieter than I expected, she sounded exhausted. I walked past her and sat down on her bed. "Oh by all means James, come in and invade my space. But can you warn me with your next mood swing… your making my head spin." She said sarcastically, I couldn't blame her. My feelings were all over the place.

"I'm sorry about that Bella, I'm kind of all over the place right now…" Bella sat down against her headboard. Waiting for me to continue. "I'm sorry about earlier…the kissing thing I - I just… fuck I don't know how to explain this." I said starting to feel frustrated with my own incompetence.

"I get it James you were horny, I was here. No worries. I see you got your fix, I know it

wasn't me I was just the closest body to you." I looked up at her wondering what the hell she was talking about, then I remembered the stupid mark on my neck.

"Well sorry to burst your bubble Bella, but you have it completely wrong. The reason I stopped earlier, is because these feelings I have for you are new, and strong, and I don't fucking get it. I have spent the last five years of my life, angry with you and hating you for reasons I don't even know myself… and this…" I said pointing to my neck. "is not quite what you think. After I left your room I was… hard as a rock and going to finish myself off, when Vickie text me." I looked over at Bella her eyes wide and face red, with my revelation. "So I went there, against my better judgment, we didn't get very far, before I stopped her…because all I could think of… was you Bella." She was staring at me, mouth opening and closing but nothing coming out. "I am really sorry that I am so fucked up, I know that the shit I did to you in the past was fucked up, my living here is fucked up, my kissing you was beyond fucked up. I just, I don't know what else to say, I should let you get to sleep." I stood up feeling like an idiot, hoping to god that she wouldn't kick me out and tell me I'm a freak, or a womanizer. I was both of those things, but it was different with Bella, she made me feel protective over her. I wanted to hold her close and keep her safe. I felt so frustrated.

I walked to my room and lay down on my bed on top of the covers, not feeling much like sleeping. I put my hands behind my head, and stared up at the ceiling. Pissed at myself for leaving Bella earlier, I should have done things differently.

An hour had passed and I could feel my eyes starting to droop, when Bella threw my door open. I sat up quickly throwing my legs over the edge so I was staring straight ahead at her.

She walked over to me, standing maybe a foot away and crossed her arms, she looked angry and she was breathing heavily, she had obviously been stewing over this since I left her room. I was waiting for the blow, for her to tell me to get the fuck out of her house, but when she spoke it was not what I expected.

"How could you leave me like that earlier, you start dry humping me and then dump me on my bed for fuck sakes, why the hell would you do that… and then you leave to go and hook up with someone else…" I was about to remind her that it didn't happen put she silenced me by raising her hand, which was now a mere inch from my face. "I know you didn't go through with it, but fuck you still left. I was well past ready do to some heavy petting then you fucked off." she growled in frustration and I realized quickly it was sexual frustration.

I grabbed the hand in front of my face, and yanked her closer, so she was now standing in-between my legs, then I ran my hands up her back, pushing her closer down, bringing her lips to mine. She instantly melted, and wrapped her arms around me tightly, maybe worried I was going to bolt again… that was definitely not gonna happen. I would take whatever this goddess gave me tonight.

**Alright there ya go, As you can see James treats women half decent, even if it is just for a lay, the only one he ever picked on was Bella, which was mostly because his best friend was doing it so he thought he would follow, remember when they started picking on her they were young, grade eight would be 13?.…. So as soon as James started looking at her like a woman, and not a Duck, he changed his tune quickly, considering he watched his mom get beat down physically and mentally from his father, he knows what it can do to someone, so the guilt and the confusion he feels is deep. He has to fight against the urge to lash out at Bella, because of two things Edward, and his father. Edward is doing it so it would be easier for James to do it too, and he had been around it his whole life, it is easy to slip into that role, it's scary at how easy it becomes**

**Edward is the opposite, he was raised to treat women with respect, but also raised to take everything for granted. His parents have lots of money and don't like telling him no. So when he first seen Bella, in her crappy clothes and her short pants, looking something close to a bum, he saw her as beneath him. Not worthy of his acceptance.**

**With the James and Edward friendship, Edward also sees James as beneath him, but also a worthy opponent because James is hot and built and smart. But he sees him as beneath him, because his home life is crap. In parts of this story I have mentioned things about Edward bringing shit up James was afraid Edward might spread rumors about his family, to make people look down on him, or Edwards comment about not letting James stay there next time he gets laid out by his dad. Edward is a control freak, he has to be able to control his friends, his family, and most importantly Bella. She was so easy and fun to control. But since her Dad died she is done with it all. Which is why Edward started lashing out, he figured, hurt her once and she would fall back in line, but when she didn't he couldn't stop himself from trying it again. **

**I know I am vague on some issues like about Bella's mom. Her mom is a bitch, she didn't want Bella back because she was enjoying the childless life way too much. And Bella is almost 18 so they figured it would be fine to leave her be.**

**Emmet, Alice, Jasper, Rosalie, don't have big parts in this story, Alice is not going to jump on Bella one day begging her to go shopping, and Emmet isn't going to treat her like a sister, at the end of the day they stick with Edward, it is James who finally realizes how wrong he was, in the way there crew worked, everyone else just shrugs it off. Although Emmet was telling Edward the truth, if he EVER raised a hand to a woman again he will beat him down.. I just don't know if that is going to happen yet….. **

**Anywho just giving you guys a little more insight.… any questions at all about the characters, just ask!!!!**

**Review Please!!**


	11. Ch11 Dizzy!

**Stephenie Meyer Owns These Characters!**

**Enjoy!**

Chapter 11: Dizzy!

Bella's POV

When James kissed me and pulled me to his lap, I should have been shocked, maybe even slapped him. But instead I felt relief. Feeling his tongue his hands, his erection pushing against me. I should have been scared, this was the first time I had ever kissed someone before. Then as abruptly as it started it stopped, he placed me gently on the bed, and bolted, I sat there for maybe five seconds before standing up and walking downstairs, I didn't want to think about it right now, so I figured I would distract myself with television, five minutes after I entered I heard something in the other room, I got up and James was holding a bottle of water and throwing his shoes on.

I knew where he was going, he was going to see another woman, to get away from the thought of me. I should have known he didn't want me. Watching television didn't seem to appeal to me anymore, I knew I would just be watching the door, hoping I was wrong. So I went back upstairs and threw my headphones on, listening to music. Not even half an hour later I heard a noise, I removed a headphone and heard James walking up the stairs, and into the bathroom. "That was quick." I giggled quietly then felt sick about it after. I turned my music off, listening to the shower start. Then I could hear him groaning, like he was pushed right up against the other side of the wall. His groaning and grunting got faster, then he stopped. I knew he was getting himself off, which means I was wrong, he didn't go to someone else.

Everything went quiet so I thought he went back to his room, I needed to use the washroom, without thinking about what I was wearing, since I had changed my panties after the very wet incident on his lap, I didn't put anything else on. I opened the door and started walking out, and there was James in all his fabulous glory, with my tiny hand towel in front of him, trying to hide his dick. I looked over his entire body, thinking maybe I could just jump him right here, or drag him in my room, then I noticed the bite mark on his neck, so he had went elsewhere. I apologized and quickly went back to my room.

Why would he have to get himself off, when he just got back from having sex with someone else… maybe she didn't satisfy him I smirked… then it faded quick when I realized if someone experienced cant satisfy him, than I don't stand a chance.

I could hear James stomping down the hallway and banging on my door.

When he told me he stopped her because all he could think of was me.. Well that blew me away. And the way his feelings were all messed up about me, I felt the same way about him. I should hate him, but instead I cant stop thinking about him. I was still hurt and confused by earlier and after he left my room I sat there for awhile thinking about it. Finally I went to his room and told him.

After I told James how much it bothered me, him leaving me like that, I felt a little whiny, but the sexual frustration was rolling off of me. He pulled me to him, so I was between his legs, and we locked lips. I leaned against him, eagerly taking what he was giving me. Hoping he wouldn't bolt again.

James scooted back onto the bed and pulled me down so I was laying beside him. He was kissing me slowly, almost savoring. Then he moved and started kissing down my neck, I had my eyes closed enjoying the feel of his lips, but when I opened them and stared up at the ceiling I froze, I felt sick to my stomach. I sat up quickly like I had been burned and gasped. "What's wrong Bella?" James voice sounded concerned and scared.

"I- I cant do this…" I said with a shaky breath, not able to get my whole sentence out.

James nodded and looked down. "Oh yeah, I'm sorry, I probably shouldn't have done that." I furrowed my eyebrows in confusion, when I realized how my half sentence sounded.

I stood up and grabbed his hand, he looked up at me shocked that I was pulling him out of his bed. "I meant, I cant do this in here, it doesn't feel right, at all." James eyes went wide when he realized what I meant.

"Oh fuck, yeah sorry, I didn't even think…" He trailed off.

"It's fine James neither did I until I opened my eyes." Being in my fathers room was hard enough, laid out on my fathers bed with a hot as fuck guy… just not cool at all.

I practically dragged him to my room, not wanting to stop before we even started, and once we had my door closed, which was crazy, it was only us who lived in the house. James pushed me against the back of the door, I wrapped my arms around his neck, and stood on my tippy toes trying to reach him. Instead he reach back, moving his hands slowly over my bum, and down to my inner thighs, he gripped them tightly and pulled me up, so I was now wrapped around him.

I could feel his erection against me, and my hips pushed forward on there own accord. James moaned against my mouth and pushed back. I never realized, grinding against each other, with clothing on, could feel so damn good. James moved faster against me. His arms around my back. I was panting and sighing against his mouth. While he bit and sucked on my lips. After several minutes James pulled me away from the door and laid us both on the bed, my legs still tight around him. He pushed against me harder and faster. His hair was falling out of his ponytail and clinging to his face, we were both sweating, and breathing erratically.

I could feel my orgasm coming close, the warm coiling in my stomach, ready to snap. I threw my head back and gasped for breath, feeling the inevitable euphoria about to surface. James moved quicker now. His erection pushed up against my very sensitive clit. His jogging pants, and my panties, thin enough that we could feel each other. My wetness seeping into the material of his pants… I would be embarrassed but I just couldn't. "You feel so fucking good Bella, you smell so fucking good." James whispered into my neck before he started sucking on the sensitive skin, and right there, it caused the coil to snap, I screamed loudly, pulling his face harder against me.

I could feel James' body go rigid over me, then he groaned a fuck, and then my name. We lay there for several minutes, catching our breath. James still had his head down in the crook of my neck kissing it softly. I held him close to me, not ready for him to leave. After several minutes James chuckled and pulled away. "I really have to clean up, its been a long time since I came in my pants." He told me, a small grin gracing his lips. I blushed at his words and James laughed lightly and leaned over me again, placing he lips by my ear. "I rub myself against you, making you moan, writhe, and cum, and you don't blush at all, but when I say the word cum, your beautiful blush appears." My face went redder, and my panties got wetter, I moaned softly at his words and when he pulled away he had a very satisfied grin.

James stood up and walked out, heading back to his room to change. I got up and grabbed some panties and a long t-shirt and went for a shower. I made sure to shave everywhere, thinking I may have a reason. But by the time I started pulling my shirt on, I was afraid maybe it was a game, maybe he doesn't care that much, is he going to come back to my room tonight, or sleep in his own… do I want him to sleep in my room… I opened the door and walked out, I stopped in my doorway and stared at the god like man laying in my bed, shirtless. He looked so damn good in my bed. "What are thinking." Asked James as he pulled me from my thoughts. I shook my head and blushed…. Stupid blush. James chuckled and reached over grabbing my hand, pulling me to him. "Now you have to tell me." I lay down beside him, as he burrowed his face against my neck.

"I was thinking about how good you look in my bed." I told him honestly. James just moaned against my neck and pulled me closer. I wrapped a leg around him and realized the only thing he had on was a pair of boxers. I was in heaven.

"So since I only have one piece of clothing on, don't you think its fair that you only get one piece too?" James question, with a devious smile on his face. As he reached for my shirt.

I smacked his hand away and told him to behave, or he would go back to his room. James chuckled and cuddled into me, not making a big deal of it. I was thankful for that, knowing I would not enjoy much more tonight, I had way too much info from the last three hours, that I needed to sleep and think.

I slept peacefully that night, the first time in a long time. I wasn't worried about my school, I didn't dream about my Dad. I didn't remember dreaming at all, I just slept peacefully, tangled up in James.

**Ok there you go…. I will do another Edward POV soon!!!! I am so putting more bumps in this story, so don't get too comfy tee hee hee!!!**

**Thank you Everyone for your reviews!!**

**and thank you "potter people eater", and "Jaspers temptress" for your wicked ideas!!! You have helped me through several blocks :D **

**Please Review!!! it makes me want to write faster :P**


	12. Ch12 Rude Awakening!

**Stephenie Meyer owns these Characters!**

**Enjoy**

Chapter 12: Rude Awakening!

James POV

I had fallen asleep shortly after Bella, feeling content for once in my fucked up life. I could feel something poking at my temple, but didn't want to move. It was becoming persistent and harder. My eyes finally shot open and I yelled "What the fuck." into the dark room. Bella shifted beside me but didn't wake up. I looked over and there was Edward standing beside the bed, he was poking me with his middle finger. "What are you doing here you creepy mother fucker?" I growled out. I heard Bella gasp beside me and then she was pulling on her blankets covering herself. I looked over and she was wide awake. Her eyes fearful. I put my hand on her shoulder and told her everything would be fine.

"I just thought I would come pay you and Ugly a visit since you decided to embarrass me in front of my family." I shook my head and scrubbed my face with my hands, trying to wake up. Wondering what the hell psycho Edward has up his fucking sleeve.

"Get the fuck out of her man, you have caused Bella enough shit, get out of her home." Edward laughed manically and shot me a deadly look. He moved back and stepped aside, there in the doorway was my father, pissed drunk and angry as hell, he had a tequila bottle in his hand with a couple gulps left. I looked at Edward and he was grinning like a fool.

I jumped up quickly and threw Bella behind me. My father laughed and stepped into the room. "Well I see you decided to stoop pretty low son, that is one ugly bitch you got right there." His words were slurred and his eyes were steeled and mean.

"Dad you need to leave, I don't want you here." I told him through gritted teeth, trying to diffuse the situation. He laughed loudly and took the last couple swigs of the golden substance before whipping it at my head. It hit me in the jaw, but didn't break. I was thankful there was no shards, but my face fuckin hurt…bad. I cried out and covered my face quickly, Bella screamed behind me. "I'm fine Bella, don't worry everything is okay." I said in a rough voice.

"Oh you think so _Son_." My father sneered and I shivered, scared that maybe he would kill me this time. He took another step towards me and stood only a foot away now. I was taller than him, but I felt small, I felt like he was the taller one. The look in his eyes, said kill. He wanted me dead.

He reached forward and wrapped both his hands around my neck, squeezing hard. I started to struggle immediately, feeling the life being squeezed out of me. "You will never see the light of another day, you good for nothing little shit." My father growled out. Bella jumped up and started to scratch at him and slap him, screaming for him to stop. I could see Edward from the corner of my eye, his smug look gone, now he looked like he would shit himself… what the fuck did he expect telling him where I live.

I could feel myself weaken. My struggling lessened. My father laughed and looked at Bella, who was trying desperately to break his hold. "You're next you little BITCH, though I may have fun with you first." Bella gasped and screamed, scared now not only for my own life but for hers.

I seen red at his threat to Bella, and I lifted my knee to his groin. He broke his hold and crouched over. I laid into him then, as I coughed and gasped. I kicked him over and over, until he was unconscious. "Call the cops Bella." I said loudly. Edwards eyes grew wide and he turned to run, but I was quicker. "You little puke, you almost got me and Bella killed tonight… no more free bees." I punched him in the jaw and he dropped to the ground. "Get up you fucking pussy, what will people think when you went down with one hit, I didn't even put my all into it." I nagged at him. He got up and growled. He pulled his fist back, but I hit him again before he could strike. I grabbed the back of his head and smashed his face into my already bruised knee, but I didn't give a fuck.

After a couple minutes the cops showed up along with Esme and Carlisle. Esme ran right past Edward and to me. "Oh James, are you alright, I-I'm so sorry about all this, I don't know what has gotten into Edward." She whimpered and pulled me into a hug.

"What the fuck Mom. He kicks the shit out of me and you hug him, that's fucked up." Said Edward, as he was being pulled from the room by a cop.

"I wish I could tell you it was alright Esme, but its not, Edward has been crossing a line for awhile now, and since I decided not to go along with it anymore, its just gotten out of hand. He is controlling and he needs help… before he does get someone killed… we could have died tonight." I said the last part more to myself, and Esme sobbed into me. Apologizing over and over again.

After being questioned about Edward and my father, everyone left, leaving myself and Bella alone.

She didn't say much, she just sat on the couch in the living room, I grabbed her hand to hold it and she pulled away shaking her head. "I need to think James, just give me a bit okay." Her voice was sad and broken, I wanted to be angry at her, it wasn't my fault, I didn't bring them into her home. But I just nodded and went to my room, closing the door behind me.

I heard Bella come up the stairs a couple minutes later and go into her room, she closed her door, and I heard her bed squeak.

I felt sick to my stomach, I finally opened up to her, and now she wont let me touch her all because of my father.

I lay there trying hard to choke back the tears, my throat feeling sore from my fathers hands. He wanted to kill me, he wanted to end my life. I knew my father was angry, and abusive, but I never thought he would purposefully kill me. I was disgusted by it and I was hurt. I had no one. My mother left, my father wants me dead, I turned my back on Edward even though that sick fuck deserved it, and now Bella didn't even want me, my life was too fucked up for her.

It had been years since I had cried, the last time I had shed a tear was when I watched my father slam my Mom's head into the kitchen stove when she hadn't finished supper quick enough. There was blood everywhere and I thought she was dead.

But as I lay in bed, I could feel the tears fall down my cheeks. I felt like I would never feel happiness, or love. Maybe I was better off just to leave Bella alone, walk away and never look back. She deserved to be treated better than how I treat her, she deserved love that I may not be able to show her.

I rolled over on my side facing away from my door, and stared out the window, the sun was beginning to rise, and I was formulating a plan. There was no reason for me to be here any longer. I would fill up my gas tank, and just leave. Leave my so called life behind.

I could hear Bella whimpering in the next room, I didn't know whether she was asleep, or upset about the night. But I couldn't bring myself to get up and go to her. I was a wreck myself, I couldn't comfort her, when I couldn't even comfort myself.

I lay there for hours, I could hear Bella toss and turn, then I heard her get up, go downstairs, I heard her in the kitchen cooking. I couldn't move or think. She didn't come up and talk to me, part of me knew that she wouldn't, but I hoped anyway. She was done with the drama, and I brought it into her home, so she would be done with me.

I got up around supper time, needing to take a piss bad. I didn't feel hungry, so I didn't need to go downstairs. After I got back to my room, my mind was set. I packed up all my clothing and my shower stuff. I would nap and then leave once it got dark. I had over $1000.00 in my bank account, I was thankful my Mom set it up for me privately. She put fifty dollars in it every month and told me never to touch it, in case I needed it one day… I was thankful that over the years, I never did. It wasn't much, but it was enough to help me get away, and start anew.

I heard Bella walk up the stairs and held my breath, waiting for her to knock… but it never came. I closed my eyes and fell into a dreamless sleep.

I woke to my cell phone alarm… It was past nine and it was time for me to fly. I quickly got changed, cursing myself that I didn't have a shower before packing.

I couldn't hear any noise and I hoped that Bella would be in bed. I had a hold of all three bags, only wanting to make one trip. I got to my car and popped the trunk, after I got in and started my car, I noticed that I still had Bella's key. I shook my head and walked back inside, I fought with the key ring, trying to remove it from the chain. I finally got it, and put it on the hook. "Your leaving." Was Bella's voice behind me. I lowered my head and didn't turn around.

"I know you don't want me hear Bella, there is no sense living uncomfortably for my sake. I am sorry about my father, but what happened last night, that shit wasn't my fault, and for you to blame me and shut me out, its fucked. I need to leave, before I fuck you up even more."

Bella was about to say something but I flew out of the house before she had a chance. I backed out of the driveway, and before I drove away I looked up to see Bella, standing in the doorway, with tears streaming down her face. My stomach clenched, and I almost turned back, but I had to leave, I had to do this for me.

I drove past the sign that, on the other side, said 'Now Leaving Forks' and instead of feeling relieved I felt sick, I felt wrong. But I continued on, knowing that the one thing that I wanted there, didn't want me back.

**Aww poor James, What did ya think??**

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	13. Ch13 No Control!

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Chapter 13: No Control!

Bella's POV

I clawed down his arms screaming loudly, feeling sick to my stomach. He was going to kill James, and then he was going to rape and kill me. Edward was in the corner of the room, no longer looking smug, now he looked green and petrified.

If I get out of this alive, his parents will know everything.

James was gripping desperately at his father's arms trying to pry them loose, but when his father mentioned hurting me, James made a horrifyingstrangled cry, and kicked his dad hard between the legs.

He let go of James and I fell back onto my bed, James coughed and his breath was raspy, and he kicked and punched his father. Without looking at me, James yelled for me to call the cops. I made sure when I ran past the still frozen Edward, I made lots of space.

"9-1-1 what is your emergency?"

"Yes there has been a break in in my home, My name is Isabella Swan, Chief Swans Daughter, please send someone now." I screeched. She told me they would be there in several minutes.

After hanging up I grabbed the paper with the number Esme left me and I called. It rang seven times before Dr. Cullen picked up. "Yes hello." Was his gruff voice, I could tell I woke him up, but didn't feel remorse at all.

"Um- yes Dr. Cullen, this is Bella Swan. Listen… um Edward is here, he brought James dad here because James is living here, and his father almost killed him. You need to do something about him, he is getting worse and he is going to cost lives." I said it trying to be strong but it came out soft and shaky.

"Oh no, god damn it. Are you alright Isabella, is James alright?" he questioned sounding panicked. I heard him stumbling around and I could hear Esme in the background asking what was wrong.

"We are okay, the cops are coming here, but I figured you would like to be here when they take your son away." Carlisle said he and Esme would be right there and hung up.

I didn't have to wait more than five minutes before the cops got there, and right behind them were the Cullen's.

I stayed downstairs and told them all to go up the stairs and they would see where the chaos was.

After everyone leaving with Edward's cussing because he was finally getting in shit for his horrid behavior. We told the cops everything then we were finally left alone.

I was exhausted and a little unsure of what I was doing with James. He had so much going on in his life, that I didn't think I quite fit in there. I was going through so much with my Dad passing away, that I was having second thoughts about letting James into my life in an intimate way.

After James went into his room I went to bed shortly, not getting any sleep, instead I lay there crying, wondering how I could care so much about someone who had always treated me so badly. Someone I barely knew.

The next day was quiet and James never left his room, I know I told him I would talk to him, but I had made my mind up that I would better myself, before even thinking about being with him. He seemed to have too much on his plate as it was anyway. I knew I had to tell him, but I felt sick about it, every time I would think about telling him I would chicken out because I liked the feel of him holding me, and kissing me, I felt so lost. Later on that day I heard him in the washroom, then I heard shuffling around his room after that.

After several minutes it was quiet again, like he had went back to bed.

I woke up to an Alarm in James room, and I heard him moving around, then going downstairs. Once I heard the front door close I got up.

I stood at the foot of the stairs, staring at the door, just then James burst back in quietly cussing at the key chain, trying to pry my house key off. Oh god he was leaving, for good. I felt sick, and I didn't know how to approach him, I chastised myself for not talking to him like I said I would. Seeing him about to walk out of my life and probably never to return, made me think I made the wrong choice, I should have told him I still wanted him.

"Your leaving." I stated. James body tensed and his head went down, before he spoke.

"I know you don't want me hear Bella, there is no sense living uncomfortably for my sake. I am sorry about my father, but what happened last night, that shit wasn't my fault, and for you to blame me and shut me out, its fucked. I need to leave, before I fuck you up even more."

I was about to tell him that wasn't it, that I didn't blame him, that he wasn't going to fuck me up any more than I already was. But he practically bolted out the door and to his car. I ran to the door, and called his name, but he was already inside. As he drove away I felt a cold wind whip around my face, and that is when I realized I was crying. I closed my door and slid down the front of it. My forehead placed on my knees. My cries grew louder and more hysterical. It was like the further he drove away the more my chest ached.

I knew I liked him, but the pain I was feeling, the horrible ripping in my chest was so much worse than intended.

I must have sat there for at least 3 or 4 hours, it was close to two in the morning, and my sobs were just whispers, my ache grew in intensity, which made me feel almost numb.

I practically crawled up my stairs and into my bed. Falling into a restless sleep full of nightmares and dark shadows.

Edward starring in most. First he would slap me, then he would stab me with pencils, dump boiling water on me… it was never ending. I woke up screaming when I felt someone touch my shoulder.

"Shh sweetie, it's okay, I just came to check on you." It was Esme sitting on my bed, running her hand over my messy knotty hair. I sobbed when the night before came rushing back to me, and Esme pulled me into a tight embrace, telling me everything will be fine.

"No no it wont be fine." I sobbed out, my voice high pitched from trying to squeeze it out between my loud obnoxious cries. "I - I let him leave, I told him I needed time and then I ignored him." I cried harder. "I made him think I blamed him for his horrible father and your Son." My hiccoughing sobs were beginning to get out of control, my words were becoming incoherent, so I stopped my talking.

"I'm so sorry about Edward, I didn't know he was such an awful person, had I known we would have stuck him in a military school long ago." Esme spoke into my hair, and if I wasn't so distressed I may have asked her to elaborate. "As for James, if you didn't want him to go you should be calling him and asking him to come back, because when he called me to come check on you, he didn't sound like he wanted to leave Isabella…" She stopped and pulled me away, she went to the bathroom and came back with tissue, I blew my nose and wiped my eyes about to ask her what she meant about him calling her to check on me. "James is under the impression that you don't want him here, that you don't care for him… it seems to me like it was a misunderstanding."

"Where is he." I asked carefully, wondering how far he went to get away from me.

"James is in Seattle, he was going to go a lot further, but he just couldn't seem to do it, he told me he couldn't go any farther until he knew you were alright." Esme gave me a little half smile that was like her son's but it was more genuine, and kind. "You are anything but alright Bella, and so is he." Esme walked down my stairs and I could hear her in my kitchen.

I came down there to join her when I realized she was cooking for me. "You don't have to cook for me Esme." I said in a shy meek voice.

"Oh I know I don't have to, but I want to, so just accept it, and thank me." So I nodded and said a small thanks. "So tell me Isabella, why did you let James leave?" Esme asked, while she was faced away from me, stirring some sort of white sauce.

I shrugged looking down, thinking of how to explain. "I guess, I thought maybe he had enough going on and so do I, that we don't need to complicate each others lives anymore than it already is. With his father, and especially with Edward, I feel like maybe him and I could never be compatible. What if he went back to school and decided to torment me with Edward again, how could I deal with that, it would hurt so much."

Esme tensed when I started to mention Edward, but I had decided the minute He brought James father into my home, I would tell them the truth. "Bella, be honest." Said Esme as she turned to face me. Her green eyes piercing my brown. "How long has this been going on for?"

I took a deep shaky breath and closed my eyes. "Since I moved here, the first day of grade eight…" Esme's eyes widened and she covered her mouth with both hands. "I walked in with Capri's and boots, and just an outfit that looked awful, I only had phoenix clothing, Edward looked at me and asked who hit me with an ugly stick…after that it continued, but it was only this year that he started to get violent with me." I looked down at my hands, when Esme had tears in her eyes and dripping down her cheeks.

"Oh Bella, I just, I am just so sorry that you have been through that for so long, all because of my materialistic son." Esme's hands turned into fists by her sides as she spoke of him, and I realized then that she was very angry with her son, and I felt good about it, I was happy that they really were caring people, they didn't just act like it.

"I think you need to give James the benefit of the doubt, I know he has always followed Edward, and I know now that that was the biggest mistake for him. I never realized my son held his best friend's faults against him, treated him like a puppet…you are the reason James grew a backbone with him Bella, you are the reason James stopped treating you badly, he finally seen the real you. He finally realized that you were a person with feelings when your father passed away, and his mother asked him to check on you… he knew right then that he had to stop treating you so horribly, he realized you were a woman, just like his mother, and he was treating you, the way his father treated her. That was a bit of an eye opener for him. "

"How do you know all of this?" I questioned, wondering how she had all of this insight.

"When he called me earlier, we sat on the phone for several hours, and he told me everything, how he felt, how he treated you before, how horrible he felt about it… but was scared that Edward would turn on him if he knew, and then how he realized he didn't care if Edward turned on him, because he wasn't a very good friend to begin with, and you were becoming too important to him to ignore, and to let people treat you badly. So I think that James is being sincere with you." She smiled slightly, while giving me the scoop.

"I just wish I could believe it was enough.." I said looking at my hands. "But I am so frightened of him turning his back on me." I told Esme honestly.

"Well you will never know until you try Isabella, and really at this point… what do you have to lose." My head snapped up to Esme by those words, I thought she was mocking me, or trying to make me feel bad, but one look into her eyes, I realized she was just being honest, she was just stating the fact.

After I had eaten Esme's spicy Italian penne, she pulled out her cell phone and dialed a number. She walked over to me and handed me the phone, before whispering. "No better time than the present."

I gaped at her, and felt a little nauseous, not sure if I was ready. I put the phone to my ear and listened to the phone ring, then he picked up.

"Esme is she alright, tell me she's alright, I feel like there is something wrong, FUCK, I'm pathetic." He growled the last part out. Obviously realizing how desperate he really sounded.

I took a deep breath and exhaled. I squeezed my eyes shut, trying to get myself together. "James." I spoke quietly, not sure if he had heard me, but I heard James take a loud startled breath… he knew.

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	14. Ch14 Stuck!

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**LEMONS!!!!**

Chapter 14: Stuck!

James POV

I drove for a while, feeling worse and worse every mile every moment I was further from Bella. Thoughts of her tear streaked face on her porch. Chanting to myself over and over again, this is for the best. I need to do this. I made it to Seattle at a snails pace, and decided to stay in a hotel there. Needing to make sure Bella was alright before I went any further.

After sitting in my hotel room staring at my cell phone for over an hour, I finally dialed the only number that I could think of. Esme, she was like a second Mother to me, never judging, always caring. "James, are you alright?" Esme questioned as she picked up the phone, obviously seeing my number on call display.

"I don't know if I am Esme, I need you to check on Bella for me. Things went… wrong after everyone left, and I need you to make sure she is aright." I told her, feeling odd and unsure.

"Of course I will check up on her, but not until tomorrow morning, first, I want you to talk to me, tell me what is happening James, you sound upset?"

So I sat there and told her of the past month, from my Mom leaving, to kicking my fathers ass before he booted me out, and of course, I told her of Bella.

"Well James, it sounds to me like you shouldn't have left, you should have stayed there, and let her think and figure things out, before you jump to conclusions." I agreed, knowing she was right. "James, this stuff with Bella, and school, did you do that too, in the past? Were you one of Bella's bullies?" I sighed feeling exhausted, but knowing I had to tell her everything.

So I spilled, from the first day, until I seen her being carried down the hall, crying and broken, after her fathers death, and my realization that Bella was not a plaything that I could hurl crude comments at, she was a young woman. She was a younger version of my Mom.

After getting off the phone with a very distressed and disappointed, yet understanding, Esme, it was past four in the morning. I fell asleep quickly, dreaming of Bella crying, her tears were blood red, and she was curled into herself.

I woke to a loud chirping noise and it only took a couple seconds for me to shoot up and grab my phone, it was Esme's cell. "Esme is she alright, tell me she's alright, I feel like there is something wrong, FUCK, I'm pathetic." I growled, feeling extremely desperate and feeble.

I heard someone take a deep breath on the other end and then say a soft "James." I gasped a startled breath, realizing right away, it was Bella.

"Bella- are you- are you alright?" I questioned, feeling my body rigid and feeling very insecure.

"Uh - hey James, yeah, I'm alright." She said quietly, her voice was shaking. We were quiet for a moment, both sighing. Bella cleared her throat, and spoke in an almost whisper. "You shouldn't have left." My heart sped up and I felt like my breath was taken away at her words.

"I know… I'm sorry I left. I thought it was the right thing, but - but the minute I did I wanted to turn back around." I got up and started to pack my bag back up, grabbing my keys from the small table in the room. Trying to decide whether or not I should go back.

"Will you come back? I - I mean even if its just so we can talk?" She questioned, I could hear the quiver in her voice, and I felt horrible about the whole thing.

"I'm coming right now, be there in a couple hours." I told her, closing the door behind me and jumping into my car, taking off down the street. I floored it speeding back to the beautiful brunette.

I made it to Bella's place just after 3pm and practically ran to her front door. She opened it before I had the chance to knock, and I went from feeling certain, to uneasy, and scared of the outcome. Bella looked nervous, and clasped her hands together and moved away letting my come in. I nodded and said a small thanks. I closed the door behind me and stood there, waiting for her to tell me where she wanted to talk.

Bella bit her lip and grabbed one of my hands in her small one. The electricity flowing between our entwined fingers, as she pulled me to the living room, and sat us on the couch, side by side. "After everything that happened the other day, I had decided that everything that was starting to happen between us, needed to stop… you have so much going on in your life, that I didn't feel I fit in. So instead of talking to you, I chose to ignore it. Hoping it would just go away..." She spoke in a rush, and my gut twisted uncomfortably. I was right, she had decided that I had too much baggage for her.

"Oh, I figured that was it, I figured that my life was too complicated for you. I'm sorry for that, I wish it wasn't." I pulled my hand from hers, feeling inferior. Bella shook her head violently and grabbed my hand again.

"I didn't finish James, after you left, the second you walked out the door, everything came crashing down, and I knew, I knew that I was wrong. I know what happened with your father and Edward was not your fault, and you also didn't choose your life, its not fair for me to blame that on you. I know that you and I together may not make much sense, but I want to be with you James. The thought of being without you, makes me feel awful. I want you James, flaws and all… just as long as you can handle and want me, with all my flaws." Bells looked down at the last part, her face turning a beautiful red.

My heart felt like it was throbbing at Bella's declaration. I didn't know what to say. She was right though even though we didn't make much sense together, I wanted to be with her too, more than anything. So instead of trying to speak, and stumble over my words, I pulled Bella forward, and pressed my lips to hers, lightly and sweetly.

Bella fisted her hands in my leather jacket and crawled onto my lap, I groaned as she pressed against my semi erect cock, hardening me further. She sucked on my bottom lip greedily, and I was taken aback by her all of a sudden forwardness. I grabbed her hips, and pulled her closer, eliciting a moan from her beautiful lips. I pulled away, feeling like I was getting ahead of myself again. I rested my forehead against hers. Breathing heavily.

"I want to be with you Bella, I want to be the one you kiss, the one you cuddle up to at night, I want to be the one you give sweet kisses to." I told her, running my tongue over her bottom lip, slightly swollen from our kiss. I could feel Bella smile.

"Are you saying you want to be my _boyfriend_?" Bella asked with a snicker. I snorted at the word.

"Well I guess boyfriend is one term…or lover… or better half…" I said between kisses. Bella smirked and pulled back.

"Better half hey? Well I must be the better half." She said as she thrust her hips forward. I gasped and groaned as her jean covered center came into contact with my erection, the soft fabric of my cotton jogging pants, doing nothing to hide it.

I nodded and spoke in a gravelly strained voice. "Yes- yes you are definitely the better half." Bella leaned closer kissing up my neck and pushed against me again. Before whispering into my ear.

"That's what I though." She lightly bit the shell of my ear and I gasped. How did I not know that sweet Bella had a little vixen inside of her. "Lets take this to my room." she spoke with roughness and sounded sexy as hell. Before I could agree, she was off my lap and pulling me from the couch, practically dragging me up the stairs.

I stopped halfway up and told Bella to hold on two shakes, I ran back down the stairs and locked and dead bolted the door, not wanting any interruptions. Bella smiled when she seen what I was doing and then we were headed up the rest of the stairs, and into Bella's room.

Bella pushed me onto her bed and straddled my lap once again, kissing me passionately, running her tongue over my lips and humming. "You taste so good." She mumbled, and I pulled back slightly, a little blush in her cheeks.

"I do, do I?" I questioned. She nodded and leaned to kiss me again, but I pulled back more. "What has gotten into you Bella? Not that I'm complaining, but what changed."

Bella shrugged and bit her lip. "Before I wasn't sure, if I wanted to be with you, but now, after knowing what it would be like without you, I'm more sure about this than anything else. I feel comfortable, and sexy, and everything feels so right… with you." I smiled widely at her and kissed her lips again.

"That's because you are sexy Bella, so fucking sexy." Bella moaned and I thrust my hips forward. Needing the friction desperately.

I turned Bella over laying her on her bed. My body covering hers. Lust and want in her eyes, I'm sure mine looked exactly the same. "I want to taste you so fuckin bad." I said in a low husky voice. Bella's eyes widened, and she looked unsure. "Let me taste you Baby." I practically purred, while unzipping her faded blue jeans. Bella slowly nodded, and I slid her jeans down her hips, and finally off her body. Next I slid her pink cotton panties slowly down and as I pulled them away all I could see was bare skin. I growled and ran my thumb over the smooth front of her. "Jesus Bella, that is so fucking hot." I groaned quickly pulling her panties off the rest of the way.

I positioned my face between her legs, and planted a soft kiss over Bella clit. She gasped and jumped, then reached down and fisted her hands in my hair. I could smell her sweet and musky arousal, and reached my tongue out, running it along her slit, finally tasting her. I moaned against her, her taste was sweet, and so fucking good. Bella was writhing and moving her hips up. So I moved my tongue faster, up and down her slit, my thumb rubbing her clit. Her hips meeting my tongue thrusts, her moans getting louder. I moved my tongue up and flicked her clit and sucked on it. I found her soaking wet entrance and pushed my middle finger inside, Bella tensed at first and then started to scream and moan wildly. I sucked harder on her clit, while moving my finger faster. I felt her body tense, and her hands tightened in my hair. "Oh James… oh I think I'm gonna…" She didn't even finish her sentence before her orgasm took over her entire body.

Her back arched off the bed, her hands fisted so tightly in my hair it almost hurt, her breathing erratic and a light sheen of sweat was covering her exposed skin. I slowly removed my finger, and took one last long lick, of Bella's beautiful pussy, Bella gasped again. I looked up at her, and wished I had removed her shirt before, wanting nothing more than to see her hard nipples. So I crawled up her body, and started to peel her simple black t-shirt off of her. She lifted her arms for me, and I had it off in seconds, glad there was no bra. I leaned my head down and kissed her lips lightly, not thinking she would want to taste herself, yet again she surprises me, deepening the kiss and moaning.

I ran my hands over Bella's hard nipples, and she arched into them. My clothed erection, pushing against her naked core. I closed my eyes, trying to keep control over myself, not wanting to push Bella too far.

Bella grabbed my jacket and took it off of me roughly and then my muscle shirt. "Too many clothes James." She mumbled as my shirt hit the floor. I agreed with a nod and pushed my joggers off, leaving my thin satin boxers. Bella wrapped her legs around my waste, pulling me tightly to her. Her wetness seeping into my boxers, making my hard cock feel slick. I closed my eyes, and put my forehead to hers, thinking I may have to leave to take care of myself… because lets face it… that shit was getting painful. When Bella's hand snaked down between us and wrapped timidly around my cock. "Tell me if I'm doing this wrong." She said shyly, as she started to stroke me softly.

I gasped at the feeling of her touching me so fucking intimately. So I moved my hand over hers and tightened it a little, setting the pace a little faster. Bella was starting to breath heavily again, and I could smell her arousal more. She was turned on by touching me, which only turned me on more. I moved my hips with our hand movements, already feeling close to cumming. "Fuck I'm not gonna last long." I mumbled into her neck, Bella started to move faster, then stopped. Pulling her hand from my boxers, she quickly pulled my boxers down, and pushed them the rest of the way with her feet.

I felt a little panicked, not knowing what she wanted, then the fucking vixen ran her hand over her wet core, and then wrapped it around my cock once again, now I was slick with her juices, and the base of my cock was pressed against her clit. We were both moaning and moving our hips. I was holding my upper body up, so she had room to move her hand, and my face was shoved in her neck, sucking and nibbling lightly. I was so close and Bella's erratic breathing, and her loud moans were telling me she was too. A couple more strokes of her hand and thrusts of our hips, moving slickly over her swollen sensitive clit and we were both cumming hard, together.

I came in hot spurts all over Bella's creamy white stomach, our chests heaving, my arms gave way and I collapsed on top of her. Bella wrapped her arms around me tightly, her hands in my hair, my hands at her sides. After several minutes, I could feel the sticky mess between us, as I sat up, we were practically sticking to each other. Bella's face was beet red. "Um sorry bout that." I said kind of sheepishly. Bella shrugged and waved it off. I went to get off the bed, but first I pushed my thigh against her core once more, just to see her beautiful reaction. She gasped and threw her head back, her back arched and erect breasts pointing straight up. "So fucking sexy." I mumbled before kissing her lips once more.

Once I stood up, I pulled Bella up with me. She looked at me questioningly. I just shrugged and pulled her to stand in front of me, her back to my chest, and walked us to the bathroom like that. I started the shower and pulled my nervous Bella in with me. Running her soapy sponge all over her body, washing my cum off her body, and then when I was done everything else, I ran the sponge between her legs and roughly over her sensitive clit. Bella gasped and let out a little squeal. The back of her head falling on my shoulders. My erection pressing into her lower back. I brought Bella to her third orgasm that day. Once she was clean, she turned around and grabbed the forgotten sponge from the tub floor, her head right by my cock. I groaned at the close proximity and instead of Bella blushing, she smirked and snaked her tongue out, running it over the tip. I bucked my hips and threw my head back.

Bella enveloped my cock in her mouth, and groaned. The vibration driving me crazy. She licked, and sucked, and ran her hand around my base. It didn't take long for me to reach my orgasm. "Bella Baby, watch out… I'm gonna… fuck, I'm gonna cum." I said through gritted teeth. Instead of moving, Bella moaned again, and sucked harder. I came violently in her sexy mouth. Moaning her name over and over. After Bella finished me off, she licked her lips and stood up. Smiling smugly. "Fuck you amaze me." I told her, pushing her against the wall and kissing her hungrily.

The water started to run cold so we finished up quickly. We dried each other off and Bella ordered a pizza. We sat around the rest of the afternoon, wrapped in each others embrace, watching movies on my laptop, in her bed.

I felt more at peace than I ever had before, with the most beautiful goddess beside me. Well after midnight, Bella rolled over and kissed me chastely before whispering a goodnight, and falling fast asleep, me joining her shortly after.

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	15. Ch15 Hell High!

**Stephenie Meyer Owns These Characters!**

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Chapter 15: Hell High!

James POV

The next morning, I woke up with Bella snuggled in my side. I smiled widely at how light I felt. Two days ago I was determined to take off, leave without a trace. Now I couldn't bring myself to leave her bed. The alarm started to go off, and I sat up quickly, Bella falling away from my side, I quickly grabing her so she doesn't fall off the bed, and start pushing buttons on her alarm clock. "Jesus fuck, how do I make it stop?" I finally asked, covering my ears. Bella giggled and reached over, pushing a single button and ending the horrid sound.

"See that wasn't so hard, was it." she said before laying back down and shutting her eyes.

"Aren't you getting ready for school?" I asked, while staring down at her brown hair, fanned around her. She shook her head and said a soft no. "Umm why the hell not." I asked more snippy than I intended to be.

"Because I am dropping out, I don't need that shit anymore, I don't need to be treated like that anymore." She said while shoving her face into the pillow.

I laid back down beside her, kissing her shoulder. "There wont be anymore shit Bella, trust me… Edward is no longer at that school, his parents sent him away for a bit… and I sure as fuck am not going to let any of those bitches touch you." I took a deep breath, wishing I had stood up for her long ago. "I know I didn't protect you before, but I will now." She looked over at me, biting her lip. I could see her debating with herself. After a couple minutes of silence she finally sighed and nodded, getting out of bed.

"Fine, I just cant wait for this year to end." She mumbled, while walking to the bathroom. She came back with brushed hair and a fresh face. She dug through her drawers, then looked over her shoulder expectedly. I drew a blank. What did she want. I raised my eyebrow, silently asking what the fuck. "Could you leave so I can change?" She asked exasperated. I laughed loudly while her face turned red.

"Baby last night I seen every single inch of you." I said while crawling off the bed and walking over behind her, wrapping my hands around her. "And I have to say I really like what I see… so there is nothing for you to be embarrassed about." I grabbed the bottom of her shirt, from the sides and lifted it over her head. Her nipples hardening instantly from the coolness of the room. I kissed up her neck and nibbled on her earlobe as I grabbed the elastic of her shorts and pulled them down her legs, now the only thing left on her body was a pair of blue boy cut panties. "See that wasn't so hard, was it." I said into her shoulder. She took a deep breath as I ran my hands over her pert nipples. "You are so beautiful Bella… so beautiful." She turned around and wrapped her arms around my neck, kissing me deeply. I ran my hands down her back and over her ass, squeezing it. Bella gasped then moaned, grinding herself into me. "If I didn't know any better I'd say you liked that." I said grabbed her ass roughly again. She moaned again and then her face turned a more vibrant red.

"Maybe I do." She said in a breathy voice. She kissed me once more than turned around and dressed quickly. I walked to my room wishing there was no school so I could ravage her, and dressed into a pair of blue jeans and a black Metallica shirt. I threw my hair in a ponytail and walked down the stairs. Bella was already in the kitchen, eating a bowl of cereal. She had a pair of black skinny jeans and a brown t shirt, her hair in a high ponytail. After we both ate, we locked up.

"So do you want to ride with me Sexy?" I asked, wrapping my arm around her waist. She nodded and said a shy yes. The way to school was silent and slightly awkward. I could tell Bella was scared of the outcome of school today. I felt very confident. She was the only thing that mattered to me in this school now, everyone else could go to hell. The second Bella opened the door and stepped out, the school was on fire with gossip. I walked over to her and grabbed her hand. "We are in this together Babe, don't think for one second that you are alone." She looked up and smiled widely at me. I leaned down and kissed her tenderly, before we made our way inside.

"Oh my god, look at them, is she like blackmailing him or something." "What the hell is he thinking." "Wow how is that even possible, did he fry is brain or something." "Maybe that's how he's paying rent." "That's disgusting." "How could he choose her…. Over Victoria." This was all heard within a minute of entering the school. By the time we were halfway down the hall. I had Bella pulled snuggly against my side.

"Its okay Bella, after a couple weeks we will be yesterdays news." Bella scoffed but nodded anyway. This was going to be a long fucking day.

Bella's POV

Lunch had just ended, that was lovely, people pointing and laughing at us, like we were some kind of mutants. I was headed to gym, and I was a little scared, Jessica, Lauren, and Victoria were in that class, and I had a feeling I was going to catch a lot of shit today. As I walked into the Change room, I was proven right. "You little BITCH." Yelled Lauren from behind me, before kicking my in the back of the knee I crumpled to the floor. "You got Edward taken away, how dare you, he is an amazing guy, and you lied to his parents, you fucking ugly piece of shit."

Jessica came up then, as I was struggling to get up, my knees were bleeding and I was happy for dark jeans. Jessica kicked my tailbone and I cried out in pain. "You piece of shit, not only do you get Edward taken away, but you decide to take James from Victoria too, how the fuck did your ugly ass manage that." I slowly stood up, and started walking away, before Lauren grabbed my ponytail roughly.

"THAT'S ENOUGH." Roared another girl from behind us, I turned around and looked about as shocked as Lauren and Jessica. It was Victoria. She looked pained and upset. "Leave Isabella alone, I fucking mean it. Edward was a fuck nut, and you know it… both of you…" She eyed both girls, that were absolutely speechless. "And as for James, that man will do nothing unless he wants to, so he obviously chose her himself. Don't either of you dare bring my name into any of this shit ever again, she didn't take James from me… because he was never mine." The last part she said a lot quieter, and I had all of a sudden wanted to hug her so badly, but I refrained knowing it would end badly for me.

The other girls left, and Victoria and I were the only ones left. "I know you didn't have to do that, but thank you, I really do appreciate it." I mumbled out staring at my feet. Victoria started to laugh manically.

"Don't you dare think for one second I did that for you, I love James and I want him happy whether it be with me, or anyone else… I don't want to see him hurt, and him seeing you hurt would hurt him…" She shook her head and sighed. "I fucking hate you Isabella… so much, but I wont touch you, consider yourself really fucking lucky." With that she turned around and left.

Gym went horrible, my tailbone was killing me. And when I got to class with James, I wanted nothing more than to curl up in his lap and cry. But I kept my strong face and he patted the seat beside him. I sat down quickly and winced, while hissing. "What Baby? Are you okay." I nodded and gave him the best smile I could muster.

"Yeah just a little… um accident in gym." I told him. His face went hard and he growled. "What ?" I asked quickly.

"I will fucking end Victoria for hurting you." He said before standing up. I grabbed his hand quickly and pulled. He turned back. "Don't try to fucking stop me Bella, She deserves it."

"No she really fucking doesn't." I snapped. James eyes went wide. "Victoria is the one who stopped it before it got worse. It was Jessica and Lauren… Victoria, hates me, but she said she would never hurt you, and hurting me would do exactly that." I told him bluntly, wanting to stay honest with him.

"Oh." He said while sitting back down. "Wow that was unexpected." He said. I nodded agreeing with him.

The rest of the day went quick, and James told me to meet him at his car after school. I was walking to the parking lot and my breath caught in my throat. There was Victoria, with her arms wrapped around James neck, and her tongue down his throat. I looked around me and people were staring at me, waiting for me to fall to pieces in front of there eyes. No way in hell would that happen. I walked closer and cleared my throat, swallowing back the vomit threatening to rise.

"Oh hi Isabella." Victoria purred. "I was just saying goodbye to James… you know my way." She said smiling sweetly. I rolled my eyes and looked up at James who looked shocked and a little pale. I walked over to the passenger side of the door, cursing myself for not bringing my own fucking vehicle.

"You gonna unlock the fucking door or what." I snapped. James turned towards me quickly, the car between us. He unlocked his and got in, unlocking mine a couple seconds later.

"You weren't supposed to see that Bella." James said as we pulled out of the school parking lot.

"Riiiight, good to know, I was under the impression that you were no longer fucking around with other women…. Oops, my bad." I said while laughing a humorous laugh.

"Fuck Bella, I'm not with any other women, she just said she wanted a kiss goodbye. The woman wouldn't let me go." I laughed at that, full out hysterical fucking laugh.

"Yeah because she could overpower you no problem, right James?" I said sarcastically. James groaned. We arrived home and I jumped out quickly. Practically running to the house. Once inside I took off up the stairs and into the bathroom. Closing the door quietly, trying not to slam it, then the walls came crashing down, along with tears rolling down my face. I took deep breaths, not wanting him to hear my hysterical cry.

After a good hour of practically hyperventilating, I walked out of the bathroom, I was about to walk into my room, but James was laying on my bed. Eyes closed, and a slight snore. The fucker was sleeping in my bed. "You have got to fucking be kidding me." I growled out. I walked down the hall and into James room. I lay down on the bed, and more tears escaped my eyes. It didn't matter what happened, everything and everyone was against us.

I was sure it was harmless. She probably said something like, 'Oh James, just one last kiss' He says fine… but really, she did it so people would see it, she did it so I could see it. The thing is, I wished he would have said no. I wish he would have cared enough to say no I couldn't handle Bella doing that to me, so no way in hell will I do that to her. I covered my face with my hands and cried silently, my whole body shaking with violent sobs.

I fell asleep awhile later, as the sun went down. Deciding that today was my last straw, never would I step foot into that hell hole again. It did nothing but destroy me.

* * *

I could feel someone shaking me, out of my dreams. "Bella, wake up… Bella." I blinked my eyes a couple times and looked around, remembering I had slept in James room. "Get up, get ready for school." He said roughly. I snickered and stood up.

"I'm not going to school anymore, yesterday was the last fucking straw." I said through gritted teeth. "Have fun though. Say hi to Victoria for me." I said over my shoulder, before walking into my room and closing the door, throwing myself on my bed, the pillow smelled of James and I turned it over roughly.

James walked in looking angry. "You have to go to school, graduate and move on, and it was not what it fucking looked like with Vickie, it was a kiss goodbye." He said angrily.

"Oh a kiss goodbye. So your telling me that you care about her so much, that you needed to kiss her one last time?" I questioned feeling hysterical, my voice rising.

"What… fuck no, she wanted one last kiss, not me." He said shaking his head.

"Ohhh, so if one of my ex fuck friends, asked me for one last kiss, and I said sure, and let him stick his tongue down my throat… you would be alright with that?" I asked.

James smirked, and crossed his arms. "Fuck no I wouldn't be okay with that, but I don't have to worry about that, since no one ever fuckin wanted to kiss _you_." He sneered at me. My breath hitched in my throat, and I choked back the tears violently. James eyes widened the minute he said it. "Fuck Bella, I didn't mean that." He said stepping forward.

I put my hand up, to stop his movement. "Yes you did, you meant every word of it, I meant put yourself in my fucking shoes for two seconds. What you did yesterday was wrong, and horrible. I hoped that maybe you would have cared enough to say no, 'no Victoria, I am sorry but I cant do that to Bella, because if Bella did that to me it would hurt deeply' That's what I would have liked. I get a hug, even a peck on the lips…" I shook my head running the scene from the day before over and over in my head. "But to be okay with her sticking her tongue down your throat, its not right…" I said, stopping right there. I was so tired of this half assed stuff. "Just go to school James, I am no longer going there, I'm enrolling online." I lay back down on the bed, and rolled over, away from the door.

I could hear James walking away, in complete silence, and I didn't know if I was glad about that, or more hurt. Who the fuck knew anymore… I sure didn't.

James POV

When I woke up alone in Bella's room, I started to panic. I knew I had fucked up. Why the fuck did I let Victoria kiss me like that. I knew it was wrong. I wasn't enjoying it, I was just giving her what she wanted, because it would never happen again. But when Vickie spoke to Bella, I knew she had done it for just that reason… she wanted Bella to see it. The morning conversation we had went all wrong, and she gave me so much to think about. What if Bella hadn't seen, would I have told her… Probably not. How would I feel if it was the other way around, I would rip the guy apart. When I told Bella I didn't have to worry about it, that no one ever wanted to kiss her before. That was old me stepping in. I hated that I said that to her. The hurt in her eyes clear as day. When I got to school, Vickie was waiting for me.

"Hey Baby, thought I could walk you to class." She said, as if nothing had happened, as if my Bella didn't even fucking exist.

"Fuck no, I think you have caused enough problems Vickie." Her eyes widened and she feigned hurt. "Cut the act bitch, you and I both know your full of shit. I wouldn't be so pissed if I enjoyed the fucking kiss, but I didn't… I don't normally enjoy people trying to fucking swallow my mouth thanks though." She narrowed her eyes and clenched her fists.

"Don't you dare talk to me like that, you and I belong together, we are perfect for each other, and you fucking know it." I laughed loudly at her. The thought of belonging with Vickie never even a possibility in my eyes.

"Listen closely to me Victoria, never will we ever be a couple, even if Bella and I don't make it through this, I still wouldn't be with you. Leave me alone." I growled out. Victoria stomped her foot and spun around, walking away quickly. Instead of going in I got back into my car. I needed to talk with Bella, and I sure in the hell couldn't wait for school to be over.

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	16. Ch16 Regrets!

**Stephenie Meyer Owns These Characters!**

**Enjoy!**

Chapter 16: Regrets!

James POV

"Bella." I hollered as I opened the front door, smoke bellowing from the kitchen window. "Bella baby, are you okay?" I ran to the kitchen to see Bella red faced and running water in a burned pan. "What the fuck happened?" I asked, the scene in front of me a little surreal.

Bella had flour all over the front of her, her hair in a messy bun, and a bowl of some sort of mixture. "I was trying to make crepes, and got side tracked." She mumbled. I snickered, Bella burning anything seemed humorous to me. "What the fuck is so funny." She bellowed, before turning around and stomping up the stairs. I stopped immediately, realizing that now was not the time to make fun of her.

"Baby, please talk to me, we need to talk." I yelled as I walked up the stairs after her. By the time I got to the top I could hear the shower starting. Without thinking I walked into the bathroom. Bella was just getting in.

"Damn it James, get out." She yelled at me. There was no way I was leaving the bathroom. I pulled my clothes off quickly, and jumped in the shower behind her. I pulled Bella to me, wrapping my arms around her. She stiffened slightly, then melted to me.

"I am so fucking sorry for allowing that whore to kiss me, it was stupid and horrible of me, and she only did it to hurt you, I know that now. I care about you Bella, so much, and I keep fucking hurting you. I need you to help me get better, teach me how to treat you the way you should be treated baby." I mumbled into her neck. My emotions were coming to the surface and I could feel my eyes prick with tears. The thought of crying in front of my woman, and showing her weakness disgusted me so much. I was always taught that crying meant you were weak. So I pulled away, and was about to step out, so she couldn't see me lose control.

"Hey wait." Bella said turning around and grabbing my hand. "Her eyes softened as she seen I was upset, and that just made me angry.

"Don't fucking look at me like that." I growled. Stepping out of the shower and grabbing a towel before slamming the door to my room and laying on my bed.

Bella's POV

Woah he went from apologizing to snapping… what the hell. I thought about the look in his eyes, the glossy look, he was going to cry. That must have been it, his father probably hurt him if he showed weakness. I got out quickly and wrapped a towel around myself, before quickly walking to his room. I walked in and seen him laying on his bed, his arm covering his eyes.

"You know what James, your Dad, he isn't here right now, and showing emotion doesn't make you weak or any less of a man, it shows me that you care enough to be upset about hurting me." I told him as I sat down beside him, pulling his arm away from his blue eyes. "Thank you for apologizing, and I swear to god if that bitch Victoria touches you again I might have to go all crazy on her." James showed me his sexy grin. "Your mine." I whisper leaning towards him. "And I refuse to share you." I said before kissing his lips forcefully. James moans and pulls me to him tightly. The kiss was short, and we lay there afterwards, silent. I knew it would take a bit for me to be fully over it, but I knew I would get over it, because I cared about James and I didn't want to let him go.

"Thank you for being so fucking understanding." James whispered into my hair. I finally got up and got dressed before cleaning the kitchen. The rest of the day was quiet, as James and I danced around each other, sharing sweet kisses. That night we fell asleep in my bed, James holding me tightly.

James POV

I woke up early the next morning, my Bella was snuggled closely to my side. Her hair fanned around her and a slight smile gracing her face. I thought about what it would be like to wake up to her every morning for the rest of my life, and the thought pleases me. I could hold her forever.

Bella must have felt my eyes on her because she woke up soon after, her beautiful brown eyes staring back at me. Before I could think about stopping myself I blurted out the only thing I wanted to say to her. "I think I'm in love with you." My eyes widened as soon as the words left my mouth, and so did Bella's. I blushed…. I fucking blushed, I felt embarrassed and rejected as Bella just lay there staring at me, not saying a word. "Fuck I shouldn't have said that I'm sorry, you don't have to say anything back, I- I should go um- have a shower." I stuttered as I started to get up.

"I think I'm in love with you too." She whispered back, pulling me back down. I didn't know what to say, I didn't think she would tell me that. "I know it hasn't been very long, but I cant see myself without you James, and I know you feel the same way, its- its like we were meant for each other." She blushed as she said the last words and I smiled at her and nodding profusely.

"God Baby sometimes I feel like your reading my mind." I mumbled before kissing her softly. I didn't want to leave the bed, but knew it was time for me to go to school. "I need to go to school Baby, go back to sleep." I said kissing both her cheeks then her forehead and finally her lips again. "I love you." I whispered against her lips, smiling like a fool. Bella mirrored my smile and told me she loved me back.

As soon as I got to school I knew it was going to be a bad fuckin day, sure enough Victoria was standing by the parking lot by herself, glaring at my car. I took a deep breath and got out, making sure to lock it, and set the alarm.

"Hey Baby." Victoria cooed, "I'm sorry about yesterday, forgive me?" She asked, while trying to grab my arm. I shake her off violently, and glare daggers at her.

"Call me Baby again, and I might have to pull an Edward and knock you down you idiot." I bellow out. "Bella as in Isabella Swan, is the only woman allowed to call me Baby, you got that shit?" Victoria narrowed her eyes at me, like she didn't already know I was taken.

"Whatever James I will only tolerate this for so long, but if you keep it up, you wont have me when you decide to ditch the dork." I laughed bitterly at her, the girl was nuts.

"Listen Victoria." I sneered. "Bella may be what you consider a dork, but she is my dork and I fuckin love her, I ain't never letting her go, so get used to it." Victoria's face looked stunned, and I smirked, before turning around and walking into the school.

"Dude, is it true you fucked Isabella swan?" Erik Yorkie asked with a snicker. I turned around and shoved him against the locker.

"Talk about my girlfriend again, and see where the fuck it gets you." I growled angrily. Erik put his hands up in surrender and I pushed him one more time before letting him go and walking away.

All fucking day I had to put up with girls trying to sway my mind, and the guys asking if I fucked my girl, I damn near left at lunch, but instead I went to my next class early and kept my head down. I wasn't used to sitting alone, but not having to talk to anyone, or try to fit in by making fun of people, it was actually nice. I could get used to this new life, as long as I had Bella by my side.

**Okay I know it was a lil umm boring, but I'm desperately trying to get back in the groove of things, still review and insult me if you must!**

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	17. Ch17 Sexual Healing!

**Stephenie Meyer owns these Characters!**

Chapter 17: Sexual Healing!

Bella's POV

I could hear James car pull into the drive way, and my heart beat a little faster. Confessing our love for each other this morning made me feel giddy, and excited. James opened the front door and slammed it loudly, causing me to jump. I turned away from the counter, and the potatoes I was peeling, to look at him. He stormed over to me with an angry look on his face, at first I thought he was going to yell at me, but instead he stomped right up to me, grabbed my arms forcefully, and kissed me hard. His hands loosened and circled my waist as I wrapped mine around his neck. "How was school?" I asked, as he pulled away to breathe and stare into my eyes.

"It was a fuckin nightmare Baby." He mumbled, kissing me once more before pulling away. "I wanted to beat every male in that place, all of them asking if I fucked you, like your nothing, and chicks throwing themselves at me. It was fuckin stupid." he growled, ripping his pony tail out and running his hands through his hair.

My insecurities tried to surface at the thought of girls trying to touch him, but then I thought back to this morning, and quickly dismissed the jealous feeling. "Well I'm sorry you had such a shitty day." I told him honestly, kissing the tip of his nose before turning back to finish supper. "Do you mind peeling and cutting the carrots?" I asked. James pushed himself against me, and kissed the back of my neck, before stepping back and grabbing the carrots.

We fell into easy conversation, James told me about Victoria and I growled, I really was starting to hate her, more than ever before. "You know what Baby, you and jealousy go good together." He chuckled, leaning over to kiss me. I bit his lip lightly. James groaned and dropped the carrot and peeler he was holding, and wrapped his arms around me. He pulled me up to sit on the kitchen table, leaning in and kissing me deeply. "Fuck you taste so good." He hissed into my mouth, causing me to moan. "Tell me what you want Baby, because the only thing I can think about is taking you to your room, stripping you down, to kiss and lick and touch every single part of your body." He said in a deep, scratchy voice.

"Oh god I want that too." I mumbled into his neck. James backed up pulling me from the table and led me to my room. I stumbled up the stairs as James practically dragged me, I started to giggle at his impatience until he threw me on the bed, and covered me with his own body quickly.

"What are you laughing at?" He growled while smirking and dipping his head to nip at my neck. I moaned loudly and threw my head back, my body reacting instantly, I could feel my wetness dripping between my thighs. James moved his one thigh between my legs and pushed it against my center, causing me to gasp.

"Oh James, I want you so bad, all of you." I moaned out, wishing both our clothes would disappear. I had never needed or wanted anything as bad as I wanted James inside of me, claiming me right now.

James stopped his movements and lifted his head so he could look into my eyes, his eyebrows furrowed. "Baby are you sure." He asked in a soft voice, so much emotion in his eyes I almost choked up.

"I've never been more sure about anything." I told him firmly, before pulling his face to mine, and capturing his lips with my own.

James slowly drug my light t-shirt up over my head, kissing every part of my exposed skin, I felt like I was being slowly tortured. I reached down to pull his shirt off but James quickly stopped me. "Go slow Baby, I want to savor this." He said in a rough voice. I nodded and pulled my hands away, and allowed James to remove my shorts and panties at a slow pace, without complaining. After my clothes were removed James started to kiss up my legs, and would peek his tongue out to lick sensitive spots. I felt like a live wire.

Slowly James took his shirt off, leaving him in his dark jeans, his grey silk boxers peeking out the top, I felt like groaning, it didn't matter how much I looked at him or touched him, his body always stunned me. James smiled almost like a predator, before spreading my legs, and before I could get nervous or feel self conscious, he dipped his head and gave me a hard kiss right on my clit. I jumped shocked at the feel then moaned, moving my hips up without even realizing it.

James licked up my slit, before sucking my clit into his mouth, my moans and panting getting louder. I could feel one of his fingers circling my entrance, the anticipation killing me, and then he slipped it inside pumping slowly, then he slipped another inside, causing me to scream out, my orgasm so close as my muscles tensed, James pumped his fingers inside me once more as he lightly bit down on my clit, and I exploded around him, my back levitating off the bed. "Oh fuck." I murmured coming down slowly. I looked down at James as he smirked lazily at me.

I reached down and pulled James too me, roughly unzipping his pants. "Now Baby, I need you Now." I growled out. His smirk dropped and I heard and felt his chest rumble, his lust filled eyes trained on me. He stood quickly and removed both his pants and boxers and quickly covered me with his now fully naked body once again, his erection pressed against my inner thigh, only an inch from where I wanted… needed it to be. The feel of our naked skin rubbing against each other was amazing. James, hair fell into his face as he leaned in to kiss me once more. His hair tickling my face and neck. "I love you so much." I murmured as James placed his erection against my entrance.

"Oh god Baby, I love you too, so so much." He murmured. "Are you sure your ready." He asked once more, the tension in his face and voice. I nodded and smiled, pulling his chest to mine. Slowly James started to push himself inside of me. We both groaned and gasped at the feel. "Fuck Baby your so tight, and wet." He gasped out. He pushed into me quickly, and the pain flashed white hot. I threw my head back and screwed my eyes shut, waiting for the pain to subside. It didn't last long and I was thankful for that, once I was in control I opened my eyes, and James was staring down at me, concern and love in his eyes. "You alright Baby." He asked in a strained voice.

"Yeah it's already stopped hurting." I told him honestly, as I moved my hips slightly. James and I both moaned in unison. The feeling was amazing. "Oh god that feels good." I whispered, moving my hips again. That's all James needed to hear. He began moving against me, as I wrapped my legs around his waist and my arms around his neck, needing him closer, James must have felt the same, because in the next instant he let his arms drop, so his full body weight was on me, his arms wrapped around my back and he crushed me to him, his hands supporting my neck, it made everything so much more intense, his pelvic bone rubbed against my most sensitive part as he continuously pushed into me. We clutched onto each other desperately, and we both fell into our orgasms at the same time, like we were one.

It was amazing and perfect, and I shook against him with tears in my eyes, still clinging to him, not willing to let James go just yet. "That was the most intense thing I've ever experienced." James mumbled into my hair, his voice thick with emotion. I nodded not yet able to talk, with all the emotions running through myself. James moved his head back to look at me, when he seen the tears his eyes widened. "Baby, oh god, did I hurt you." His voice sounded so scared.

I smiled widely at him and shook my head. "No it- it was just so intense, and amazing, it was so perfect." I told him as he wiped my tears away. James then smiled widely and leaned in to kiss me softly.

"Me too Baby, me too." Smiling down at me. He slowly pulled himself out of me, causing me to gasp. I wanted nothing more than to feel him inside me forever. He was my home. James walked to the bathroom, and I couldn't help but ogle his firm behind. He looked back and caught me, causing me to blush and him to chuckle.

A minute later James came back with a wet cloth and spread my legs, I was going to ask what he was doing, but before I could, he ran the cloth over my center, cleaning up our mixed juices. After disposing of the cloth he came back and lay down beside me, pulling me to his chest. I could hear the thump of his heart and feel his chest expand and contract as he breathed and could not think of a better place to be. "I love you." I told him without moving my head. The minute I spoke the words I could hear his heartbeat quicken, as he whispered his love back into my hair. It was then, at that moment that I realized, I affected him, just as much as he affected me. I fell asleep with a smile on my face, and not a care in the world.

James POV

What a day, when I got home the last thing I thought would happen would be to have Bella give herself to me… fully. It was amazing, and so intense. I had felt tears come down my face and had to hide in her hair so she didn't know. I had never felt so vulnerable, and happy, and loved.

I lay beside her, listening to her soft breathing, and thinking about how much I love her… until I smelled smoke my eyes widened when I realized there was some sort of meat in the oven, I think Bella said ham. I moved slowly from Bella's sleeping form, so I didn't wake her and jumped up running down the stairs quickly, and turned the oven off. I didn't know whether to open it, or what. I looked through the window of the oven and there were no flames, thank god. So instead of opening it I left it there, and opened a couple windows, so the whole house wouldn't smell like smoke.

I chuckled to myself as I walked back up the stairs and into Bella's room my discarded pants were on the floor, my wallet had flown out and sat open, something gold flashed, I furrowed my brows and took a step closer, to see what it was and then my heart stopped. The small unopened foil package glaring at me, calling me a fucking irresponsible idiot. "Fuckin' great." I mumble before crawling back into bed with Bella. She moved her body into me, like we were magnets to each other, I loved the feel of her body, but my brain would not shut off, Bella's first time, and I had forgotten one of the most important things… a fucking condom…. Oh well what are the odds of getting pregnant your first time… right?

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	18. Ch18 Morning Light!

**Stephenie Meyer Owns These Characters!**

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Chapter 18: Morning Light!

Bella's POV

I woke up the next morning sprawled across something hard, and warm… I quickly realized it was James, our legs were tangled together, I lay mostly on top of him, my head on his chest, my chest on his stomach. I then realized that we were both very naked, and his very prominent erection was pressed against my lower stomach. I could feel myself blushing wildly, as I tried to disentangle myself from him, but James wound his arms around my body and held me tightly to him, turning us both on out sides. James grabbed my one leg and hitched it over his hip, causing us both to gasp, as his erection pressed against my clit. James slowly ran his hand up my back to my neck, and pulled my face to his, he hadn't opened his eyes yet, but he was definitely awake. He pulled my mouth to his, kissing me so deeply, sucking my bottom lip into his mouth.

"Morning Baby." He said after a minute, both of us were gasping for breath. "How are you feeling today?" He asked, concern in his eyes. My brows furrowed in confusion, then I realized he was asking if I was sore from last night… the truth was I could feel nothing but want right at this moment.

I let out a breathy "Fine." While thrusting my hips forward, causing James' erection to run over my very wet slit. James chest rumbled loudly, then he pulled away. I couldn't understand what I did wrong. James must have seen the hurt in my eyes because he gave me a breathtaking smile and leaned over me, he pulled something off the floor and I realized it was a condom. "Oh." I said dumbly, as James fumbled to open it. After rolling it over his stiffness, he lay back down beside me, and pulled my top leg over his hip once more, slowly, very slowly, he entered me, he snaked one arm under my body and pulled my upper body close to him, his other hand held my hips close. I loved the closeness.

"Fuck you feel so good." James moaned against my neck, as he sheathed himself fully. I could only moan in response, it was so electric, as he moved in and out of me in slow motions, it was so intense and yet not enough, I had a slow aching feeling in my lower stomach, it was growing and uncomfortable. I started to moan and thrust my hips to him, trying to do more. "What do you need Baby." He whispered against my shoulder.

My shyness seemed to have leapt out the window, because I said without even blushing. "Faster, harder, fuck I need more." James' chest rumbled once more before he quickly rolled us over, so he was above me, and then he pulled us up, so we were in a sitting position, my legs wrapped around him, arms around his neck, and then James started to pound into me, gripping my hips hard, pushing into me faster, and it was so much deeper. My head fell back as I could feel my orgasm coming very quickly, and before I could form a coherent thought, I came, screaming and shaking wildly. James was still moving wildly, kissing my exposed neck, then lower, taking one of my sensitive nipples into his mouth, biting lightly, and I could feel myself close again, it was the most intense experience, I didn't even know it was possible. "Oh god James, I think… oh god I think I'm gonna cum again." I moaned out, feeling the coil tighten. James then reached one hand between us and started to rub my clit.

"Cum with me Bella Love, cum with me." And I did, I screamed out his name, my body convulsing once more, and more violently than the last, and I could feel James tense at the same time. He moaned out my name, his body shuttering. It was amazing, and so powerful. I hadn't thought anything could be batter than the night before, but this was so much more powerful. James lay us both down, and pulled out of me, he quickly got up and walked to the bathroom, seconds later, he came back, and lay back down beside me. I raised an eyebrow wondering what he had just done. He shrugged and smiled, pulling me to him and kissing my forehead. "I had to take the condom off." He said into my hair. I nodded then thought of the night before.

"We didn't use one last night." I stated, kind of surprised that I hadn't thought about it, but then we had been in the heat of the moment. James took a deep breath.

"I know, I forgot, and I am so sorry for that, I should have been more careful." I looked up at him and covered his mouth with my hand.

"Hey You, don't you dare try to take all the blame, I may be knew at this, but I know about condoms, I even have a box in my drawer, we are both to blame." James was smirking at me by the end and nodded. Kissing my hand lightly before I pulled away. "Good, now I need a shower." I said getting up. James was right behind me, holding me close.

"Well then I need one too, mind if I join, you know to preserve water and all." I rolled my eyes at him, and blushed slightly.

"Oh Baby, now you blush.." He chuckled in my hair.

It was nearly twelve in the afternoon when I decided to venture out of my house. James was at school, and I needed to buy some groceries.

The drive to the grocery store was quick, and I was zipping up and down the isles like nobody's business, as I came around the last corner in the produce isle I smashed into the side of someone's cart. "Oh my god I am so sorry." I called out looking up. I noticed a crooked grin first and then began to blush. It was Dr. Cullen.

"Oh well hello Isabella, how are you doing?" He asked with a slight chuckle.

"Oh um I'm good, how are you?" I asked, feeling a little uneasy, since I hadn't spoken with him since the Edward incident, only Esme.

"Well that's good to hear, I really am sorry about all of the trouble my son caused you." He told me with a slight frown. I nodded and told him it was fine. "Well then have a good day Isabella, I have to pick up several more items for Esme, and I am having a hard time finding them." I giggled a little, remembering how Charlie was the same way… totally lost at the grocery store.

"By Dr. Cullen." I said and was about to walk away, then I remembered something. "Oh um.. Dr. Cullen, would I be able to um- maybe set up an appointment for birth control." I stuttered out, my face going beet red. Carlisle's eyes widened for a second, before going back to normal.

"Oh well, yes of course Isabella, make an appointment for three weeks from today, and we will do a full exam before I put you on anything … alright." I nodded and said a thank you, before walking away. I was not looking forward to a full checkup, I had never had a pap since there was no reason, and I avoided it, but there would be no more of that… ugh!

I quickly finished up, grabbing strawberries and raspberries to put over some ice cream for dessert. Then I made it home, with little trouble.

It was nearing six in the evening and I had just finished cooking supper, just spaghetti, and James still wasn't back. I was itching to call his cell phone, but didn't want him to think I didn't trust him. My mood was going downhill and I felt awful for being upset with him. It wasn't like we were a married couple, we were still in friggin high school, he can do whatever he wants… well to an extent as long as we were a couple.

After finally eating myself, I made a small bowl of ice cream and cut up some fruit, before turning the television on. I watch some sort of sitcom without really seeing it. My stomach was in knots, and I could feel myself getting more and more anxious.

By ten o clock I broke, and picked up my phone to call him, when he answered, I had wished I hadn't called. There was so much noise in the background, catcalls, and screaming, whistling. "Hello." James yelled into the phone, I could hear him laughing and commenting to someone in the background.

I cleared my throat and tried to keep my voice calm. "Hey, I was just calling to make sure you were okay." I said while I smiled, hoping it made a difference with my voice. It was like we would take one step forward and two steps back.

"Oh hey Baby, I'm just visiting with some friends." He slurred into the phone. I nodded feeling my throat tighten. I really didn't want him to know I was upset, I didn't want him to feel bad for my insecurities.

"Come on Jamie, get off the phone and have a shot." Screeched a girl in the background.

"Damnit woman, stop calling me Jamie." He growled back, I heard the girl giggle and say 'whatever' "And I'm trying to talk to my woman, so everyone shut the fuck up." He laughed and yelled at the same time. I could hear people making gagging noises in the background, some people shouting out how he could do better, other people calling him a pussy. I heard one shout 'oh your just fuckin' her so you got a place to stay.' I clenched my teeth together along with my eyes.

"Well have fun with your so called friends." I choked out before hanging up. "Fuck fuck fuck." I screamed loudly, picking up my glass I threw it across the kitchen, and it shattered against the far wall, by the front door. My breathing heavy and erratic. I didn't lose my temper often, but right at that moment I was so…. So….so angry, and hurt, and pissed at myself for being so angry and hurt. He had a life before me, and it was stupid of me to be upset that he still had one. I was just hurt that the people that were supposed to know him, that were supposed to be his friends, talked so badly of me.

I stared at the glass for a long time before walking over to it, I stared down at it, and the water, the broken shards glittering brightly against the kitchen light. I leaned over and began picking up the larger pieces, but of course I cut my hand open. I growled and quickly threw the pieces away that I picked up, and practically ran up the stairs and into the bathroom, before opening my hand. The gash was not wide nor deep, but the instant I watched the blood start to swirl down the white sink with the warm water, my head began spinning.

I quickly grabbed the cloth and closed it in my bleeding hand as I walked to my room and lay on my bed. My head spun wildly as I tried to regulate my breathing. "Fuck it, I'll clean it up tomorrow." I mumble to no one but myself. I drifted off more quickly than I could have thought possible, but I was so very thankful.

James POV

I was in a great mood, smiling like crazy, as I pulled into the school, and I was shocked as hell that my old friends were all standing there minus one pretentious bastard Edward. Jasper, Alice, Emmett, Rosalie…. They were all there with smiles on there faces. "To what do I owe the pleasure of your fine ass holes company." I joked. Emmett boomed a laugh loudly, and everyone else just chuckled.

It was crazy, but also nice how easily we all fell back into our old pattern. Lunch time we all sat together and caught up. "So James, tell us about Bella." Came the lil Pixie's voice. I sighed and looked down trying to hide the smile, but no one missed that shit.

"Aw man, our boy is in Love." Jasper laughed from beside me. I could feel myself blush, yet again. _What the hell is with all the blushing, Bella must be rubbing off on me_.

Everyone else joined in laughing, but they weren't making fun, they were just genuinely happy that I found someone… well everyone but Rosalie, that bitch was a bitch, no matter what, everyone ignores her.

"So we are going out to La Push tonight to have some drinks, we are leavin' right after school, and we aren't takin no for an answer." I thought about it for a minute, wonderin' how Bella would feel, but she would be fine, these are my friends, and I haven't hung out with them in a bit.

"Yeah man, that sounds awesome." I told Emmett. Everyone seemed pleased and I was kinda excited, it had felt like so long.

The rest of the school day went by quickly, and Jasper jumped in with me to go to La Push, and Alice decided to ride with Rosalie and Emmett, I knew something was up. "Okay man, spill." Jasper chuckled before lookin over at me.

"So you Love her don't you." He stated. "I mean head over fucking heals in love with Swan." He chuckled, sounding amused. I nodded still looking out the window. "Well okay then, just don't let her change you… chicks like her, they are kinda prissy, and well just don't change for her, stay true to yourself." I didn't know whether to hit him, or laugh.

"Sure sure man, I will." I didn't think Bella was changing me, taming me yes but that's only because I couldn't imagine another woman touching me now. But I don't think I am changing. I shrugged and kept driving, today was about drinkin and having fun with friends and that is exactly what I'm gonna do. "I should probably call Bella, let her know I'm not gonna be home for dinner." I mumbled out, not wanting her to worry about me.

Jasper laughed loudly. "Fuck man, I'm sure she'll manage." He said amused. I took a deep breath and put the phone back in my pocket as we pulled up to the beach.

"Yeah man your right." I said before jumping out. There was already a handful of people on the beach, sitting around a new camp fire, including all of my closest friends.

"James man, come take a shot and a beer." Bellowed Emmett. I quickly ran over and grabbed both from him.

It was dark out, the fire burned brightly, and I was beyond dizzy. Fuck I should have called Bella. I thought as I looked at my cell phone. I was gripping it tightly in my hands all night, not wanting to miss a call if she wanted, or needed to get a hold of me. Alice and Rosalie were dancing by the fire with a group of girls. Emmett Jasper and a couple of the La Push guys were goofin off. And beside me was Leah, she was from La Push, and nice, not once did she try flaunting herself at me, and I didn't have to worry about her. Every half hour Alice would come over with a shot and I would take it, even though I knew I should probably stop.

It was just after ten when my phone rang with its familiar ring as the screen lit up saying 'Home' with a picture of my blushing Bella. The minute she started talking I knew something was wrong. She was trying to keep it hidden, but it didn't work. Then some assholes made fun and started talking shit and the last thing Bella said was "Well have fun with your so called friends." Before hanging up. I growled loudly and looked up at everyone before standing up and stumbling.

"You guys have got to be fucking kidding me, my woman calls me, and all you people can do is cut her down." I was raging, yelling loudly. "I am in love with her, and it really fucking sucks that you ass holes cant suck it up and treat her the way she deserves to be treated, she doesn't deserve the crap she gets." I growled loudly before stumbling away. I was almost at my car when a small hand grabbed my shoulder. "What the fuck." I yelled and turned around to find Leah standing there with one hand on her hips and the other hand out.

"Give me the keys ass hat, I am not letting you drive, I will drive and get Sam to follow." I nodded and handed her my keys, knowing she was so fucking right. "Sam lets go, follow me."

"Sure sure." He mumbled, while her cousin glared daggers. I never did understand why he broke up with Leah for that snot bag.

Once we were driving I looked over at her. "Thank you Leah, your awesome." She smiled and nodded.

"I think you made a mistake coming tonight without Bella, why didn't you bring her?" Well that threw me off guard why didn't I bring her.

"I don't know, I guess I don't put my friends and my girlfriend in the same category." I mumbled. Leah snickered at me.

"Well sorry to burst your bubble Romeo, but if you want your relationship to go anywhere you better start putting them together." She looked over at me and raised her brows, I nodded. "I would fucking lose it, if my man took off to a party without even calling me, what the hell, and you guys live together, so not only have you gone all day without calling her, she has to sit at home worrying about you, not knowing if your okay, and probably scared to call you cause she doesn't want you to think she was overstepping, you put her in a really shitty spot tonight."

"Wow, I never even thought about it like that… and I should have… Fuck." I growl at myself, we make love the first time the night before, and I go AWOL on her the next day… damn I'm a jerk.

"I think your friends are supposed to be supportive, not trying to get you away from her." she mumbled quietly. "And you shouldn't let them make you doubt yourself." I nodded as we pulled up to my house… my very dark quiet house. "Now go drag your drunk ass up those stairs, and kiss her ass… and don't you dare sleep in, hangover or not, make her breakfast." I nodded again and got out. After locking my doors she handed the keys to me, as Sam pulled up. I started walking away before she called out. "And take a fuckin shower like now, you reek." I laughed at that.

"Thanks Leah… oh and fight for your man, that bitch don't deserve him." I yelled so Sam could hear it too. Leah blushed and Sam looked down. I quickly made my way inside and hung the keys up in the dark, I took one step and something crunched beneath my feet. I quickly turned the light on and noticed a shattered glass, with a small drop of blood. My gut twisted uncomfortably as I ran up the stairs and into Bella's room, her bedside lamp was on, and she was sleeping above the blankets fully clothed. She had a cloth in one hand and I gently removed it to see how deep it was, it was just a small gash, and was no longer bleeding. I sighed in relief and made my way back downstairs, cleaning up the glass.

I quickly jumped in the shower and scrubbed myself, then brushed my teeth and used mouthwash. I brushed through my hair leaving it down and damp. After putting on a fresh pair of boxers I walked into Bella's room, gently removing her slippers and socks, and pulling the blanket out and over her then I crawled into bed and turned off the light. I pulled her against me and she turned over facing me, wrapping her leg around me… at least she wasn't so mad that she woke up screaming at me to get out. I enjoyed the cuddles, knowing that tomorrow was going to be a bad day… Fuck I'm an ass hole. "I'm sorry Baby. I love you so much." I mumbled into her hair before kissing her lips lightly, and closing my eyes, letting the darkness take me.

**Well I hope you guys enjoyed the new Chapter! **

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	19. Ch19 Here We Go Again!

**Stephenie Meyer Owns These Characters!**

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Chapter 19: Here We Go Again!

Bella's POV

I could see the light streaming through the window, with my eyes closed, I felt two strong warm arms wrapped around me, as I lay on James chest, I burrowed my face against him more, trying to get comfy… then everything came rushing back from the night before, and I seen red.

Quickly jumping up from my bed I stared down at James sleeping. He reached over, obviously trying to find me, but instead grabbed a pillow, and wrapped his arms around it. His hair hung around him, his naked torso showing. Damn it if he wasn't perfect. My breathing was erratic, and I was so angry. I wrenched the pillow from his arms in one quick motion, lifted it over my head and swung, hard, hitting him in the face. James eyes popped open in shock, and once again I lifted it over my head and hit him again.

James didn't move, he just lay there stunned at my actions, and I kept swinging. "Don't you ever do that to me again." I screamed loudly. James cringed, obviously hung over. "You make love to me, the night before" '_Smack' "_Then you take off" '_Smack' _"You don't even call to let me know your okay" '_Smack'_ I was hitting him everywhere, I knew the pillow wasn't doing much damage, but fuck it felt good. "Fuck you for making me feel this way." I screamed again, feeling my whole body shake with the force of my scream. I hit James once more, but this time, James grabbed the pillow and pulled, making me topple over him.

He wrapped his arms around me tightly pulling me to him. "Shh Baby, Shh. I'm so fucking sorry." It wasn't until he said '_Shh Baby_' That I realized I was crying. Damn him. "I was a dick for not calling you, and an even bigger dick for not dragging you with me." He mumbled into my hair. "I keep fucking up with you."

I calmed down, and lay there with him, trying to collect my thoughts, as my adrenalin left my body. Taking a deep breath I looked up at him. "Are you sure you want this." I asked sincerely. James looked confused and I kept on. "I mean I know you love me, and I love you, but are you sure you want to be with me James, to be in a relationship with me?" He just stared at me, I could see the hurt in his eyes.

"Of course I do, why would you even ask that?" He said in a dead tone.

I shook my head and sat up, crossing my legs I looked down at him. "It's just that things you do, make me think you want to be single… unattached. Maybe your not ready for this." I looked down, feeling sick. "It's not like I'm going anywhere James, if you need time I will give it to you." I told him choking back my tears. "I know we love each other… but we are supposed to communicate… things like yesterday…it shouldn't happen" I mumbled the last part. James was sitting up and leaning against my headboard, his face was totally void of emotion.

"Are you breaking up with me?" He asked, crossing his arms in a defensive position.

"No… I don't want to break up James, but I'm giving you an easy out." I could feel my tears fall down my face. I quickly wiped them away and turned my face to look out the window. Anything but staring at his emotionless face. I could feel James moving, and felt the bed shift as he got up. I was expecting him to leave the room, but instead he kneeled down in front of me, both arms on either side of me, his eyes were glassy, as he looked into mine.

"Don't give up on me Bella, I need you." He whispered out, his voice cracking at the end. "I want this I want this more than anything in my fucking life, I just need you to teach me, tell me when I'm being a fuck up." He looked down as a tear fell down his cheek. I breathed a sigh of relief and pulled on his arms to bring him closer.

"I'm not giving up, I just want to make sure your ready for this." I told him with a shaky voice. James moved forward quickly and captured my lips with his own. Pulling me from the bed and straddling his lap.

"I'm so fucking sorry Baby… I was supposed to cook you breakfast." He mumbled against my neck. I giggled at that.

"Why were you supposed to cook me breakfast?" I asked amused.

"Leah told me I was an ass hat for doing that to you, and that I better not sleep in and to cook you breakfast, I slept the fuck in." I laughed at that, not knowing who Leah was but liking her a lot.

"Well I think I like her." I told him, biting his earlobe lightly.

James moaned and squeezed me tighter. "I can do it, right now if you want me to." He said while getting up, and lifting me with him. I shook my head, tightening my legs around his hips.

"I'm not hungry for breakfast right now." I purred in his ear. James groaned loudly before laying me on the bed, and himself on top of me, most of his weight on me his hardness, right where I needed it.

"Hmm and what my sweet Isabella, are you hungry for?" He growled seductively against my neck, causing me to moan.

"You Baby, I'm hungry for you." I moan out as he pushes against me. Next thing I knew my shirt and bra were thrown to the floor, quickly followed by my pants, the only thing between us was my lace panties and his boxers. "God why do I feel so lost without you." I mumble out, pulling James body flush with my own, feeling his naked skin against my own driving me crazy. "I need you closer James." I whisper into his ear. Quickly we both tear off our last piece of clothing and I reached into my bedside dresser for condoms.

"I feel the same way Baby, I need you closer, always closer." He mumbles as he quickly puts it on.

"Hurry James please, I need to feel you." I beg as he positions himself against my entrance. My hands pulling at his hair, as my legs are wrapped around his waist tightly, pulling him into me.

He entered me quickly, my nails biting into his back, as he bit into my shoulder pumping quickly. I knew it wouldn't last long, everything was too intense. I was screaming and my head was rolled back. James pelvic bone was slamming into my clit repeatedly and before I could even think about it, we were both screaming our release, clinging to each other. "Well fuck that was quick." He chuckled into my hair, causing me to laugh breathily.

"But still amazing." I tell him. "I love you James."

"I love you too Baby."

Our week after that went by quickly. After my pillow attack and our make up sex, we let it all go. I knew that James was new at this… and who the hell am I kidding, so am I. So we got through it together, and we will continue to get through it together.

When James went to school on Monday, I felt a little uneasy at first, but I knew that I had to get over that.

He had told me he was surprised that I didn't think he was with another woman, but I knew that he loved me, and even though he was a tad… inconsiderate, I knew he wouldn't do anything with another woman, especially after the whole Victoria fiasco.

But when I had heard his car pull up after school, I cant say I wasn't breathing a sigh of relief.

"So baby what we having for supper?" James asked on Friday, as he came up behind me, kissing my neck. I took a shuttering breath trying to concentrate on peeling the potatoes.

"Ham and Potatoes." I mumbled as I heard a knock at the door.

James ran to answer it, and I could hear a female voice, talking. "Well come on in, and ask Bella." He said, I could hear a smile in his voice. I turned around to see a pretty girl with caramel skin and long black silk hair. "Hey Baby this is Leah, Leah this is my other half Bella… or should I say me better half." He joked.

I wiped my hand off and shook her offered hand. "Hey nice to meet you." I told her shyly.

"You too." Leah said with a big smile. "Nice to see you didn't throw his ass out after the lil stunt he pulled." Leah said as she narrowed her eyes at James, James put his head down and scowled. Making me laugh lightly.

"Nah, he is so stuck with me." I told her honestly. James looked over and smiled at me lovingly.

"Well I came here because I don't have your number, but I wanted to invite you guys to La Push Beach for a bon fire its not this Friday but the next, no booze just friends hanging out… and I don't mean those ass hats from your school, I mean friends from La Push." She said giving James a look. I nodded enthusiastically

"That would be awesome, what time you want us there, and should we bring anything?" Leah thought for a minute.

"Hmm just hotdogs and marshmallows, I will get the buns and graham crackers and chocolate for smores. And lets say come around four." She said excitedly. I agreed and we exchanged phone numbers before she left.

"I like her." I told James as she drove away. James looked down and smiled brightly.

"I'm glad you do Baby." With that we finished supper.

Two week after that I was sitting in Dr. Cullen's office Friday at noon waiting for him to come in. My legs were vibrating, and I was coming down with a flu. I didn't say anything to James, because I really wanted to go to that Bon Fire tonight.

"Isabella, hello how are you feeling today?" Dr. Cullen questioned as he opened my folder. I nodded and said a small fine. "Well that's good to hear, now Have you been sexually active?" He asked as my face turned tomato red. I nodded. "Okay then have you had unprotected sex at all?" OH MY GOD I was screaming in my head.

"Um yeah once, but we have been safe except for that one time." I said in a rush, I could see the disapproving look on his face and I wanted to stick my tongue out.

"Okay then have you had your period since then?" I thought about it, I had my period a couple days before we first had sex, I hadn't had it since.

"Um no but I think I should have it soon." I told him feeling a little uneasy. Trying to count the days in my head.

"Well then I will have to do a pregnancy test just to be sure, then we can get your pap done. I nodded feeling sick. "Okay here is a cup for you to pee in, and the bathroom door is on the left, when your done, leave it on the counter." I nodded mutely and grabbed the cup.

It took a minute to make the pee come under pressure, but it finally did. When I walked out there was a nurse standing by, ready to grab it. I ducked back inside as Dr. Cullen. Was prepping the little bed. "Ok now Bella, I want you to remove everything from your bottom half and cover yourself with the paper blanket, I will come back in with a nurse to do the exam." I nodded and quickly stripped after he closed the door. A minute later he was knocking lightly. I called him in, and he walked in with a strange expression and a nurse at his side.

He quickly did my exam. (AN Seriously, I don't think any of us want details on that! LOL) Excused himself while I got dressed again. It wasn't as horrible as I thought it may be, but Dr. Cullen hadn't said much, was something wrong. Again he knocked and then came in, with the same nurse. "Is- is something wrong Dr. Cullen?" I asked as they both stared at me.

"Well Isabella, it seems that I have some news for you." I raised my eyebrows waiting for him to tell me….

James POV

I was finishing my last class, feeling excited about tonight, and worried about Bella, she was nervous about going to the doctors she really didn't like going there much, but she knew she had to get it done, and birth control would definitely be nice.

I drove home quickly, and noticed Bella wasn't home, so I quickly jumped in the shower and got ready to go to La Push. It was a great day out, the weather was warm, it was going to be fun.

I ran to my room and threw on some boarder shorts and a muscle shirt, throwing my hair back in a low pony tail. When I heard the beast pull up, then the door open. "Hey Baby I'm almost ready to go, are you ready." I yelled down the stairs.

"Um yeah give me five minutes, and I will be." She yelled back. She sounded strange. So I came out of the room, and seen her walking up the stairs she looked dazed.

"Baby, are you okay?" I asked, she turned to me, and looked out of focus for a minute before she shook her head and nodded.

"Yeah yeah I'm fine, just in a daze." She chuckled. I nodded and she went to her room.

We packed up and grabbed warmer clothes just in case, and we drove down to La Push in Bella's truck. When we got there, there was only two people sitting at a fire. It was Leah and Sam. She was clutching his hand tightly, and he was kissing her forehead. I smiled brightly as we walked up. "Well hell, its good to see you two back together." I said as I shook Sam's hand, and hugged Leah. Leah laughed lightly and Sam grinned. Leah introduced Bella to Sam and I sat down, pulling Bella between my legs, in a big fold up chair.

Bella was being quiet and I didn't know if she was just being shy or if something was wrong. But before I knew it more of the La Push gang showed up, and Bella started talking with Jacob, she said she knew him from her Dad, and they were laughing, talking about old times. It was nice to hear her talk about her Dad, she was more light hearted about him as days went on, hearing his name made her smile not cringe.

It was starting to get late, and Bella was leaning back against me. She had gone quiet again, as everyone talked around us I watched her side profile. She was worrying her bottom lip, and seemed to be having an internal discussion. "Baby, is something wrong." I asked quietly so no one else could hear. She took a deep breath and nodded.

I could feel my heart start to pound wildly, after the incident three weeks ago, we had gotten along so well, did I do something, is she fed up with me. My head felt dizzy as I wondered what I did, she grabbed my hands and placed them on her stomach. My brows furrowed in confusion as a tear slipped down her cheek. The next words she said stopped my breath, my heart.

"I'm pregnant…"

**DUN DUN DUN! OH MY GOD I know I know mixed feelings, but I had to do it, I just had to… **

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	20. Ch20 Stunned!

**Stephenie Meyer Owns These Characters!**

**Enjoy! I apologize if there are mistakes!**

Chapter 20: Stunned!

James POV

I sat there staring at her, my mouth agape, Bella had turned her head to look at me, as my hands still rested on her stomach, which had a baby inside… our baby inside. I closed my eyes feeling faint. One fucking time, the first time and I get her pregnant….what the fuck are we gonna do. Is she going to get rid of it, do I want her to get rid of it, do I want to keep it. I didn't know. "Oh" Was all I could say, all that would come out of my mouth. Bella nodded slowly and turned her head back to everyone else. We both stayed silent for awhile.

We sat there as the moon raised high in the sky, and the only ones left were Seth and Embry. Seth looked over smiling. "You should take sleeping beauty home." He whispered. I looked down and was shocked to see Bella sleeping, I hadn't even realized she had fallen asleep. I slowly slipped out from behind her, and lifted her up bridal style. Saying a quiet goodnight, I slowly and carefully walked us over to the truck. She felt more fragile to me now, more vulnerable. I took a deep breath breathing in her scent and slowly placed her in the truck. She opened her eyes as I pulled the seat belt over her and smiled timidly.

I smiled back and leaned forward, kissing her hard on the mouth. "Were in this together." I murmured against her lips and pulled back. She smiled her lips began to quiver. "Hey Baby hey don't cry." I told her. She took a couple deep breaths before she looked back into my eyes.

"I want to keep it." She whispered as she lay her hand on her stomach. I nodded mutely and looked down at her hand, covering it with my own.

"Than we keep it." I said simply. Trying to act like I had more confidence than I really had. Inside I was quivering like a bitch. I was gonna be a Daddy… holy fucking shit. "Lets get home." I told her, kissing her lips once more before closing the door and walking around. I got in and started the beast, I reached over and grabbed Bella's hand as we drove in silence.

The drive home was short, and Bella quietly walked inside as I grabbed our bags and the cooler with our pop and water. I placed everything in the fridge and dumped the melted ice down the sink. I could hear Bella start the shower, and made my way upstairs. Quickly removing my clothes, I jumped in the shower behind her, wrapping my arms around her tiny frame, she slowly turned around, returning the embrace. We stood that way for awhile. Letting the hot water beat down on our naked forms. Bella cried silently against me, clutching me.

"We will get through this Baby, we'll take classes, take up a babysitting job for experience, everything will be fine." I cooed to her. Bella nodded against my chest, as her sobs became more faint. I washed Bella's hair for her, helping relax her further.

I guess I had a feeling deep down that there was a chance, since I had woken up twice in the last week to Bella throwing up. After we were finished up I dried her off slowly, kissing her neck and back and chest as I went. "Lets go to bed Baby." I said as I finished. Bella nodded and slowly walked to bed. It was killing me that she was so quiet. As we lay down beside each other, her back to my front, we were totally naked, and vulnerable. "Talk to me Bella, tell me what your feeling." I finally said, knowing full well she was awake.

She took a deep breath before speaking. "I'm scared, I'm scared you will leave me, I'm scared you will decide that I'm not worth all of this… and I am so… so scared that I wont be a good enough Mom." She said all of this quickly and quietly. I pulled her closer and kissed her shoulder, running my hand over her stomach.

"I will not leave you, and you are so worth everything… and this child, this baby growing inside of you, is mine too, I will be the best Daddy I can be, and you are going to be an amazing Mother. You are always putting people first, and you are so caring Bella, you will be amazing. She sighed and rolled over facing me.

"Thank you, I needed to hear that… and you will be an amazing Daddy." She smiled brightly kissing my lips. I smiled against her, pulling her tightly to me, of course my cock hardens at the feel of her. But I quickly shook my head.

"Don't even think about it… we need sleep Mr." Staring down between us with a stern look on my face. Bella laughed loudly, kissing my forehead. Sleep took us both quickly, and with Bella in my arms, we can conquer anything… even parenthood. The last thought I had before falling asleep was that I wish my Mom was here.

I woke up the next morning to Bella flying off the bed and into the bathroom, seconds later she was throwing up. I quickly followed her in, and pulled her hair back, while she emptied her stomach. "Okay its obviously not the flu." She mused as she slowly reached up to flush the toilet.

I chuckled and shook my head. "Nope definitely not." I agreed as I placed toothpaste on her toothbrush and handed it to her. "Here Baby brush your teeth and go back to bed, I'll make you some toast and Jam." She smiled and nodded, saying a small thank you.

I ran downstairs and quickly made her toast, with a glass of water. _I would have to talk to Dr. Cullen and ask him what can help with morning sickness_. I made my way upstairs with her food and drink, and a book for her to read. "Okay Baby, relax, read, and call my phone if you need anything, I have to go out for a bit." I told her, kissing her on the forehead.

"Okay thank you James, I love you." She mumbled through a mouthful of toast. I chuckled and left quickly.

I drove up to the Cullen residents feeling a little uneasy. I knew I would get a talking to, especially from Carlisle. I took a deep breath and pushed the button for the door bell. Esme opened it almost immediately with a huge smile on her face. "Oh James how are you… and why do you look so guilty." She asked raising a perfectly shaped brow.

"Um well, do you think I could come in." I asked needing to sit for this. Esme quickly led me to the living area and I sat down. She excused herself to get us a drink, and Carlisle. They both came back, Carlisle looked stern and Esme looked confused. "Okay you two tell me what's going on." She said as they both sat down across from me.

"Well um I know your not my parents, but I think of you as just that, and this is hard, and I know Carlisle already knows…" I trailed off clearing my throat. "Okay Bella is pregnant." I finally said. Carlisle nodded, and Esme gasped.

"Oh dear, is she okay, and James what were you thinking not using protection." She said raising her voice higher. I looked down at my hands not saying anything. It was irresponsible and I already knew that.

"Bella is fine, well except she has been getting sick the past couple mornings, and well we know now that it is morning sickness. Is there anything to help with that?" I asked looking at Carlisle.

"Well why didn't she say anything?" He asked standing up. "I will write a prescription for her. I shrugged and nodded. Esme stood up and walked over kneeling in front of me.

"Are you alright James, how are you handling this." I shrugged looking down once more.

"Its still new, I'm processing. Bella wants to keep it, so I have to man up and help however I can, I know it will take time, but its my baby in there, so I am dealing." Esme smiled and pulled me into a hug.

"Oh James I am so proud of you… now I'm not saying teenage pregnancy is something to be happy about, but I am happy that your taking responsibility. And I will be here for both of you, every step of the way, all you have to do is ask." I nodded against her shoulder, feeling like a weight was lifted off of me.

"Thank you Esme, that means a lot." I told her, hugging her back, tightly. Carlisle came in and cleared his throat.

"Well here is the prescription, you may want to grab that today and get her to take it soon, it takes a couple days to start working." I nodded and said thank you. "And James, if you need anything, even just someone to talk to about what to expect, call me, I am always here for you son."

"Thank you Carlisle." I said shaking his hand, feeling my emotions on the edge. After leaving I went right to pharmacy and grabbed her prescription thankful that Carlisle put it in my name.

"Hunny I'm hooome." I called as I walked inside. "And I come baring morning sickness cure…. Or at least something to lessen it." I yelled walking up the stairs. There was Bella, brushing her freshly washed hair in the bathroom. A smile on her face, and she was no longer pale.

"Hey, I feel better now, I don't need anything." I smirked and handed her the bottle of pills.

"I beg to differ you definitely need these, Carlisle said to start taking them today because it will take a couple days to start working" Her eyes widened.

"You went to see them?" She asked surprised. I nodded and smiled.

"Yeah I don't like seeing my Baby suffer, and I needed to talk to them about it anyway, they are kinda like the closest thing to parents since my Mom took off. She nodded and smiled, pulling me into her and kissing me deeply.

"I love you." She murmured, causing me to smile.

"And I love you." I told her before kissing her once more.

**Holy Jumpin Jelly Beans…. I'm all written out for today, hope you guys enjoy!**

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	21. AN SORRY AGAIN!

**Ugh hey everyone, I know it has been forever, buut... lets just say i would love to throw my computer clear across the room... its broken down... again. I cant believe i have only had it for less than a year and yet it refuses to cooperate with me... on top of that i am writing my own novel on the side, slowly but surely... they are all my characters and I am falling in love with them dearly, thank god i have a backup drive i save to... So between un cooperating computers and my lovely novel coming into shape, i have been forced to put my stories on hold! Damn i hate saying that, I promise that as soon as i am up and running again i will take the time to re aquaintence myself with my amazing readers and my fanfic stories... Please dont curse me i promise to be back and finish them all...**

**And thank you so much for all your reviews, i read them all, i may not respond often, but i honestly love to hear everyones positive and helpul messages, please take care and i will be back!**


	22. Ch21 Growing!

**Stephenie Meyer Owns It All!**

**Hey Guys, I seriously am coming to a close on this story soon, I dont have much left to write on it so enjoy while ya can :P Enjoy!**

Chapter 21: Growing!

James POV

3 Months Later.

I lay beside My sleeping Beauty, her soft snore making me chuckle, it seems every week that goes by her snore gets a little louder. I had made the mistake of bugging her once, she cried... alot, I apologized... alot. So lets just say no more teasing the pregnant woman. My hand was placed on her stomach, and I could feel our little baby nudging my hand, it was the first time I had felt it, Bella has been feeling it a lot lately, but not me, every time I would place my hand on her swollen belly, baby would stop. Bella told me it was because I calmed it. So this morning, finally feeling my angel nudging my hand, I felt incredibly happy, and like the luckiest man in the world.

"Ohh about time." Came Bella's quiet sleepy voice, I hadn't even known she had woken up.

"Morning Baby, our little angel finally acknowledged me." Bella smiled widely and giggled.

"She already acknowledged you before, she was just playing hide and seek." I rolled my eyes at Bella's silly antics. Kissing her lips then kissing her stomach I stood from the bed and walked downstairs.

Bella had finally decided to move into my room, her Dad's room, she was going to counseling once a week, to help her grieve, and she realized there was nothing wrong with taking over his room, and especially since her room was literally half the size, and would be a perfect nursery.

Now I was making Bella breakfast as I do every morning, my woman on an empty stomach, was something that made me cringe. Making scrambled eggs and toast, I set the table. Feeling very much like the domestic man I had become.

We both opted to leave Forks High School, and do an online program to help us graduate, and Esme Volunteered to stand by for our tests. I didn't mind that people knew I was about to be a father, but I just didn't need nor want to hear people talk down about my Bella... bad things would happen if I heard people bad mouthing her, things that could send me to jail... and that is something I did not want to happen.

Bella had gotten very close to Leah, so we made regular trips out to the reservation, and Leah would coo to Bella's stomach for what felt like hours. Bella thought it was the funniest thing in the world... I have to admit, I was a little jealous the woman cut into my tummy time, but I refrained from saying anything because I knew I would sound like a fucking douche if anyone ever found out how whipped I really was.

Carlisle and Esme were a godsend, Esme insisted on redoing Bella's old room, and paying for it all, under one condition... we were not aloud to look, watch, or even sneak a peek until it was complete. Bella was upset about all the money she knew Esme would spend on the nursery at first, but after awhile she became genuinely excited about it. On occasion Esme, would bring up Edward in conversation, talking about his Military school, and how much he had changed... for the better. I had a hard time believing it, but I hoped for all there sakes, that it was true.

As for Carlisle, he was my own personal savior. Carlisle was not only teaching me how to be a better father than my own was, and how to discipline without physically harming your child, he had helped me find a mechanics training job... where I was learning by watching and a little helping during working hours, and cleaning the shop... and the washrooms, after it was closed. The washrooms were a downfall, but I would never complain about it, the opportunity was amazing, and the pay wasn't bad either.

I was taken out of my musings, by my beautiful womans arms wrapping around me, as I finished cooking the eggs. "What you thinkin bout sexy." Bella purred, kissing one of my many scars on my bare back, making me shiver... the woman was insatiable. My woman pregnant was a very sexual being.

"I was thinking that you better eat before your food gets cold." I told her as I turned to face her. She had an adorable pout on her face, that made me laugh. "Aw come on my horny lil devil, after you eat I promise to let you take advantage of me, we have all day I don't work today." Bella's smile grew huge as she rubbed her hands together like she was scheming... and then sat down to eat.

We spent the rest of the morning reaquainting ourselves with each others bodies... like we really forgot. Bella's little belly cocooned between us, always protected, as it will always be protected. Just before two in the afternoon, Bella jumped up and gasped. "Shit, shit, shit." She growled, throwing clothing on, and quickly whipping her hair up. "Our appointment is today James, the ultra-sound. I could feel my eyes widened, I couldn't believe I forgot. Jumping up, I too got dressed quickly.

We got to our appointment just in time, and an older lady with pop bottle glasses and a massive wort on the side of her nose, led us in, she was the technician. first she found the heartbeat, it was small and quick, and such a sweet sound. Then we finally got a picture of our baby, the tech pointed out our baby's feet, and hands, and legs, and the face... but when she asked if we wanted to know the sex of our child, we froze up. I didn't know, I hadn't given it much thought. "Well it's up to you baby, what do you think." Bella shrugged, her eyes wide, and still staring at the screen.

Finally she turned to the tech and said. "Is there any way you can write it down and put it in an envelope for us... I don't know if I wanna know, I need to think about it." The Tech rolled her eyes and snorted, but did in fact write it down and stick it in a small envelope for us. Then after paying for a couple of the ultrasound pictures we left, with huge smiles on our faces.

Bella's POV

I felt like I was on cloud 9, in my glory. I had never seen or heard anything so beautiful. Our child, we got the first glimpse of our precious baby.

I placed the envelope on our kitchen table, not knowing what to do with it quite yet, and sat in the living room with James by my side, we stared at the two pictures of our precious baby. It was the most amazing thing. The tiny little feet, toes, fingers. James was as excited to stare as I was, he was such an amazing man to have at my side, and he worked so hard at being there for me... for us... I rubbed my stomach once more, as I stared at the picture, feeling for the first time anxious, wishing the time was now... but really it was so far away, we had close to five months to go still. I was even more anxious to see the room Esme was setting up.

"I dont think I have ever been so happy." James whispered against my neck, his one hand against mine on my stomach, the other on my lower back. "I am so, so lucky to have found you... for you to have accepted me into your life." His words sounded choked, so I looked over at him, and sure enough her had tears in his eyes. I leaned up and kissed his slightly roughened chin, since he had opted shaving for the day.

"Whats wrong Baby?" I asked leaning back so I could look at him.

He shook his head and smiled at me. "Absolutely nothing... thats just it though Bella, for the first time in my entire life, I don't want to move, or run away, or hide, or fight... at this moment in my life, there is nowhere in this whole world that I would rather be... no one I would rather be with... I never thought I would feel this way... I never thought I could be so damn happy."

By the end of his sentence I too was in tears. "I feel the exact same way James." I mumbled, wrapping my arms around his neck, and kissing his lips lightly.

James quickly deepened the kiss and I moaned loudly, my hormones taking over. I quickly turned and straddled his lap, grinding myself against his rock hard erection, my core already soaking wet. I ripped the elastic from James hair so I could feel his silky strands against my palms, as his hands run under my shirt and up my body, to my beaded nipples. I moaned again at the exquisite feeling. My whole body a live wire. I quickly reach for James belt buckle, needing him inside me, but before I could even start to undo it, a loud bang startles us both out of the moment. Someone was banging repeatedly, and loudly at our front door.

James moans. "Are you fucking kidding me, that would have to be the worst timing in the whole entire world." I nodded and slowly slid off of James lap, then started to walk towards the door.

"Cover that thing eh." I teased as he adjusted his erection, to hide it... or at least make it not so noticeable.

I grabbed the door handle, and opened, then jumped back and gasped. There on the other side of the door was Edward fucking Cullen. James started walking toward me then, but he couldn't see the door where he was standing. "What the fuck Baby, you okay." He asked, coming up behind me. When he came into view, I couldn't see his reaction, but I could hear his intake of breath, and he quickly grabbed me and pulled me behind him, in one, swift but soft, move. "What in the fuck are you doin' here you prick." Ground out James.

Edward was standing there, his face one of calmness. "Well I came here to apologize." Came his reply in a rough voice. "I know I fucked up, and damn near got ya killed, so I felt badly." James laughed out loud, but the sound was hard, and held anything but humor.

"You want to apologize for bringing my abusive father, whom you knew was abusive, into our home, while we slept... wow Edward how nice of you. How about apologizing for vandalizing the late Chief Swans room... or maybe you could apologize to Bella for it, and don't forget the rock throwing... oh and how about pulling her from her truck and letting her fall on her face..." By the end of that, James chest was heaving, his fists clenched at his sides. I knew he was close to breaking point. So I reached out and touched his back, running my hand over the center of it, then up onto his shoulder, and then down his arm, and finally to his hand. He grasped it immediately. His body calming.

"Oh fuck James, you did a lot of shit too." Came Edwards heated reply. "Pushing her, calling her ugly duckling, why the fuck is it all being blamed on me?" James took a shuttering breath, I could feel him tense from the memories of the horrid way he used to treat me. But I forgave him long ago... he just needed to forgive himself now.

"I apologized for that... repeatedly." He said in a shaky voice. "I will forever be sorry for the shit I put My Bella through, but thank god, she forgives me... listen Edward your not welcome near our home." James said his resolve getting stronger.

"Are you fucking kidding me, you get the her knocked up, so now we can't be buds no more." James tensed once more, and this time so did I.

"I don't want to be buds anymore, because the only reason we were is because I enjoyed being destructive... I'm not like that anymore man, I'm actually happy for once in my life, and I'm fucking proud that I'm gonna be a Daddy, this will be the best thing I will ever do... and I swear to fuck, if you ever talk down to Bella again, I will beat you down."

James POV

I watched Edwards eyes widen as he realized I was a very different person from the last time I had seen him. "Listen man, the best thing you can do for yourself, and for your family, is to go see a counselor, find out what makes you so damn angry." Edwards nostrils flared, his fists clenched. "Baby go upstairs to our room for a bit okay." I said over my shoulder, still keeping Edward in my sights. Bella grunted a response, that let me know she was not happy about it, but she went anyway.

"Listen Edward, last time I saw you were in the corner of Bella's room while my Father tried to strangle me to death, you showed him where I lived, you wanted me dead, there is no way in hell that I want you back in my life. The only one to fuck up our friendship is you... and in all honesty, the friendship we did have was cruel. I am so over it."

Edward crossed his arms and huffed. His cheeks were tinged pink, maybe he was finally rightfully embarrassed by his actions. "I know I fucked up, and I was such a prick, but I'm getting my shit together, I'm better I promise. Hell I even met someone I'm serious about. I just wanted to come by and apologize... I know I have a long way to go with my temper, and especially where Isabella is concerned, but I am trying."

With that Edward turned around and walked back down the drive way where his silver Volvo was. I sighed in relief glad he didn't resort to violence, fighting just wasn't something I was interested in anymore. "Oh and by the way." He yelled back as he opened his door. "Congrats man, your gonna be a great Dad... even though it is fucked up that your only 18... but still man, I'm glad to see your happy." I nodded a thanks and closed the door, shutting him out of view.

I needed to think long and hard whether I let him back into my life... and Bella would be a big part of my decision. She had the final say in the end.

I walked up the stairs and into our room. She was laying on her back, reading a book. A scowl on her face, that told me she was pissed at my dismissing her. "Aw Baby, I'm sorry." I said crawling onto the bed, and kissing her stomach. "But I didn't want you near harms way and he was close to wanting to attack me." I said as I kissed my way up, lightly nipping one of her nipples through her thin shirt. "Don't be upset with me, I just wanted you safe." I said in a softer more serious tone, as I kissed her jaw. "I love you so much, your my world, I want you and my daughter safe." Bella sighed, and put her book aside, pulling me over her, the anger had left her eyes, and now there was understanding and trust.

"I know James, I was just upset that I couldn't be there for you." She finally said, kissing me lightly on the lips. "And why did you say Daughter... do you know what it is, did you look." I smiled and shook my head.

"Just a guess... Baby, I think I want to look." I finally said remembering the envelope on our kitchen table. "what about you?"

Bella nodded, her smile widening. "Yes I really, really do." she giggled. I smiled and laughed with her then jumped off the bed.

"Ok be right back." I ran down the stairs, grabbed the envelope, and then ran back up the stairs. "Do you want to look or do you want me to?" I asked. She leaned forward and kissed my cheek.

"How about you do the honors." She said softly.

I took a deep breath, and then slowly opened the envelope, pulling out the small square of paper, the side I was looking at was blank, so I slowly turned it around, and there in the middle of the page was one beautiful word...

**Mwah ha ha ha... What do you think it will be? Boy or Girl.! I hope you enjoyed!**

**Review Please!**


	23. Ch22 Reveal! End!

**Stephenie Meyer Owns It All!**

Chapter 22: Reveal! **LAST CHAPTER PPL!**

James POV

I smiled widely at the single most beautiful word, I could feel Bella vibrating with anticipation... I almost wanted to tease her, but I didn't want to tick her off. "You want me to tell you, or do you want to read it yourself?" I asked seriously.

Bella rolled her eyes at me. "tell me right now James!"

I smiled again and leaned foreward, kissing hier lightly on the nose. "We my beautiful Bella, are having a girl." Bella's eyes lit up and she threw her arms around me tightly, we both started to laugh, and then cry. The emotion that ran though me at that moment, was like nothing I had ever felt before. We were going to have a little girl, I pictured a little girl with her mothers hair, and my eyes running around happily, her tinkling laughter a constant thing in our household.

"This is so amazing." Bella sobbed into my neck, I nodded into hers, unable to use my voice.

...

Later that evening, as Bella and I relaxed on the couch, embracing each other, our gazes on the television screen but our brains far away, both of us most likely thinking of the same thing... our beautiful future. "What do you think she will look like?" Bella murmured, confirming my thoughts.

"Brown hair, like you, blue eyes, like me... i think she is going to have the same cute nose you have..." Bella giggled and turned towards me, her swollen stomache cocooned between us once more.

"I hope she has your eyes... you have amazing eyes." She told me, as she softly run her hand over my brow bone.

5 months later (okay I know some of you may not like this... but they are happy, and I really don't want to put anymore hurtles in there way during pregnancy! sorry!)

"Push Baby, you have to push." I said firmly to my Bella. She was beyond sweaty, and looking pissed off, her glare, and grip were almost enough to send me to my knees, but I was gritting my teeth and holding on, because I knew it was nothing compared to what she was going through.

"What the Fuck, do you think I'm doing..." she trailed off as a scream erupted from her throat. Carlisle was at the other end, between Bella's legs, monitoring her and the progress. I could see the distress in his eyes, and at that moment I wished I didn't know Carlisle so well, because I wanted to be oblivious.

"Bella, I know this hurts more than anything else in the world right now, and if I could stop the pain I would, but the honest truth is that I need you to push through the pain, your Daughter is struggling right now, and in order to get her safetly into this world, you are going to have to hurt yourself." Carlisle told her grimly. "Can you do that?" Bella's anger melted away, and in it's place came horrible, stark, fear. I could feel it set into myself too.

"I can, and I will." She said confident, and determined.

Carlisle nodded. "Okay, another contraction will be hitting in seconds, and when I say push, you push Bella." Bella took a deep breath and nodded, "PUSH" he yelled, his voice was so loud it rattled the walls.

Bella was completely silent, her breath was held, she was pushing violently, and hard, then Carlisle breathed, relief washed over his face, Bella finally breathed again, and then, a cry erupted in the silent room. My head whipped back towards Carlisle, and there in his hands was my baby girl, she was covered in blood and fluid, but still, she was the most precious beautiful thing. Carlisle looked like a proud Grandpa, and he damn well was in my books, and I knew in Bella's too. "Congrats to you both, you have a beautiful, and healthy baby girl."

I walked over and took the scissors from a nurse, who then directed me to cut the umbilical cord. Bella was smiling dazedly as I brought our daughter over. She smiled up at me, and opened her mouth to speak... but then a machine started to go crazy, and a nurse hastely but carefully pulled me away,I turned back and Bella's eyes were closed, and she was motionless as Carlisle stood over her. I placed my girl down in a plastic looking bassinet, then stepped closer to my Life. "Tell me she is going to be fine." I choked out to the roomfull of people.

Carlisle didn't look up, he just worked quickly, there was a nurse working between Bella's legs, and I could only imagine the mess that they had to stitch up... I was more worried about Bella's pale skin, her blue tinted lips... and just as I was about to lose it, the monitor stopped, and Carlisle sagged. "She's fine, she's fine." He murmured, I think more for his own benifit, than mine.

"What happened." I asked, wide eyed and scared shitless, a couple minutes later.

"Bella lost alot of blood, and it slowed her heart down... too much, but we have her hooked up to a bag, and she is already getting color back, the nurse is done stitching her up... which by the way she is going to be horribly uncomfortable, and not be able to move well for awhile, which means you will be doing alot of baby duty for the first month James, can you do that?"

I nodded like crazy. "Of course I can."

...

Carlisle was so not kidding when he said I would be doing most for the first month, Bella was in alot of pain, and she was frustrated because of it, she hated to be helpless, but it was hard to be pissy for long in our house, our baby girl was always making us smile.

"Where's Angel." Bella asked half asleep.

"She is in her kick ass bedroom, fast asleep baby, so don't worry." Bella smiled and rolled over. Her discomfort was slowly getting better it had been three weeks since Angel was born. When Bella and I had come home, and opened Angel's bedroom door, we damn near fell over... it had everything, crib, rocking chair, change table, monitor, a full closet of clothing, diapers in 4 different sizes, formula stored... and a whole lot of frilly pink things, and stuffed animals. So our Daughter was in style. Her Gramma did her good... and we let Carlisle and Esme know just that... that they were her Grandparents, and we were so thankful that they were there for us. We put a picture of Charlie in her room, so that she would know her Papa too.

So we are doing amazing, our lives had gone from scared, sad, alone, and troubled... to happiness, love, hope, and peace. I dont think I could ask for anything better, nor would I want to change a thing.

Edward had not come back, and I was thankful for that, some people... you just have to let go, even though it may hurt a little.

**Okay there you go guys... THE END**

**I hope you liked it, I know it was short, but like I had written in there last chapter, I was done, the main reason I wrote this story was to see them through the hurtles... and I think I succeeded in that! I hope you liked, please review!**


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